DTH Classic: Best of DTH - Year 1

[00:00:02] This is a Bramble Jam Podcast

[00:00:48] We're making it perfectly clear up front, Clip Show Clip Show They tried to trick you They tried to trick you We're not trying to trick you, not here But I think you're gonna like it So for the next two weeks we've split it up because it's a lot It's a doozy It's a lot Today we're gonna take a journey back to our very first year Because I don't know if you guys know this But next week is our two year anniversary of doing this podcast Wow, unreal One thing we didn't get to do last year around this time

[00:01:15] Was do a best of competition Did we have a best of? We did like the best of episodes We counted on the top five That was almost like a That was more of a trick, I feel like To get to a million listens Yeah, it didn't work But it was close It was close But in all honesty Maybe people might wanna hear the top five Because some people come in after the season Maybe don't bend yet I actually am excited to listen to this I've not listened yet But you gotta put it all together So here's what we have This week we're gonna go back to our very first year

[00:01:44] June 30th, 2018 to June 30th of 2019 Wow And we're gonna listen to the best of moments from year one And then next week we're gonna do it all over again Year two And there's been a lot of great moments There's been so many good moments It's almost like when you're just with your buds Hanging out, watching a movie It's like good moments just transpire Transpire You're so right You're so right Guys, are you ready to dive into this? I'm ready Let's do it Here's how it's gonna work

[00:02:12] We're gonna hear what episode these clips are from You'll hear some clips And then you'll get an introduction to the next episode And so on and so forth Bingo bingo For the next nine hours Are you guys ready to go? Let's do it Let's do it These first batch of clips are from Rocky Mountain Christmas June 30th, 2018 Hi, I'm Brandon And I love Hallmark movies I'm Daniel And I like Hallmark movies And I'm Dano And I despise Hallmark movies And this is the Deck the Hallmark podcast

[00:02:51] Welcome to the first ever Deck the Hallmark podcast With your three best friends And they put the tree up He has said no trees And he comes in and you think he's gonna get like fiery I thought that was gonna be the drama He gets a little fiery And instead he's like He says He says What's this tree doing in my living room? But then he said We treat our guests well And then he says You're not the first guy to try to sell me the same horse twice Right Which I did have questions about But then he lets them put the tree up and decorate it Like so Uncle Roy clearly is still pro-Christmas But I do

[00:03:21] Yes I have a question after that statement He's just stinging from aunt or aunt Beth's death Has he bought the same horse twice? I'm gonna go base off of that Yes And I think that's why his ranch is failing Right He's a pushover It's because he only has two horses out there Right And he's buying them again and again Somebody's paying for four horses But he only has two Yeah Calling it a ranch is a stretch It's a barn two horses a house I don't know I do think No We need to We need to point out that there are some things in the distance

[00:03:50] That we're not privy to Yes Okay Okay Yeah Sarah is in the lobby of the hotel she's decorated in Yes And her friend at work, her classic work friend Is telling her how good of a job she did Yes And her friend walks off And Sarah's I think bummed Kind of melancholy Yeah But happy, you know And her friend does a turnaround And comes back And I'm not making this up Walks up to her and goes Just a heads up

[00:04:18] Big boss man Jeffries or whatever his name is Yeah Is at your 12 o'clock And then big boss man Jeffries or whatever his name is Walks from behind her Now I don't like either Either she doesn't know how to work a clock No Or she's never used the 12 o'clock phrase Here's the thing 12 o'clock is in front of you She was at her 12 o'clock Sarah's 6 o'clock So was it information But she said It was a misinformation At your 12 o'clock Yeah I think that's true You never say someone's at your That's where you're looking already I understand

[00:04:47] And so I know it's a small thing But I'm in the movie And she says Big boss man Jeffries is coming at your 12 o'clock And then she comes from behind her And I'm like somebody doesn't know how to tell time And this person's in charge of a hotel Christopher Palaha Rocky Mountain Christmas July 6th 2018 I want to remind you of something that Daniel said About your movie And he said that it was a dog turd And I would like to give you time to rebuttal that

[00:05:17] And to try to persuade him that he's wrong That Rocky Mountain Christmas is not a dog turd Because it's not I mean Daniel Dan Danny Dan This is surreal What do you do? I mean what do you do with that? Like how do you say No it's not a dog turd? If you think it's a dog turd When we filmed You know it's funny

[00:05:44] When we filmed Rocky Mountain Christmas We actually had a bunch of scenes Where we were on horses And we were riding There was actually some really beautiful footage That did not make it in the I was about to say I didn't see much on horseback No in fact the only guy And he fought for it Because he's Treat Williams Who by the way is a stud You want a podcast about stories with actors? I've got a ton of stories This guy blows me out of the water He has stories about driving through Cuba

[00:06:14] With Robert De Niro and Christopher Walken Where he's the only guy Who knows how to change the tire That's gone flat Like he flies a plane Christopher Walken Not knowing how to change a tire Is a SNL skit right now I don't know Is it a nut? Is it the rim? It's flat It should be not flat Like yeah exactly There's three more Can't we still drive on the three that are good? That's fantastic I love it

[00:06:44] Switch for Christmas July 21st 2018 This is how I And I think I got it So Tom and Kate meet In the short window of time that he's there When did they establish he was there? When At some point we know that they met And planned to go skating that night And he shows up to skate And Kate could not make it to the skating room She had a prior engagement Correct

[00:07:12] So she in her excitement of meeting Tom Says Tom I'll meet you at the skating room And then later she's like oh no And she says Chris just go for me And like get to know him And then come back So then my next question is So basically Kate goes Chris I really love this guy Yeah I can't make it Can you just show up And and put on a good face And maybe not make out with any guys while you're there And Chris What was she hoping would happen between Chris and Tom?

[00:07:41] Chris cannot keep her desires in check Right And just goes nope Got to do the kissy face That Chris Dixon let me tell you She is just a rapscallion Just an absolute woman of the night And she can't You mean to tell me She cannot just meet Tom Kinder And say hello Nice to meet you I'll see you another time And call today and go make out with whoever she wants to She can't even do that for her sister If the rest of this is accurate That would make sense why Kate and Chris are hanging out This is a way to remember the whole month This is a combo too

[00:08:09] But it's important to note that Tom showed up early Right? Tom showed up early So Chris had plans with the man If you're doing the switcheroo You can't be like well we'll make out until it's He's supposed to be at eight So let's make out until 7.59 But what if she already had plans? She already had the plans But she said she'd do a solid for Kate I know But what I'm saying is Kate says hey can you just go for me And she's probably like yeah I can go I'm already gonna be I already gotta be there Cause I'm making out with the boy It wasn't a fiasco because they switched It was a fiasco because she just

[00:08:38] It was a fiasco because Chris couldn't stop it It was a fiasco because Chris isn't a good sister The Tom Kinder Fiasco Explained Featuring Randy Carter July 26, 2018 There were Originally in the film There were flashbacks To the Tom Kinder fiasco And in fact if you look up I am switch for Christmas IMDB You'll see actors including real twins And somebody credited as teenage Tom And the teenage twins And they had real twins playing them

[00:09:08] And so all was explained And I'll go through exactly what the Tom Kinder fiasco is Thank the lord But they felt Like the forward momentum of the story Sort of just died Whenever we cut to these flashbacks And so they wanted them taken out It's years ago However many years ago it's supposed to be Kate meets Tom At an ice skating rink Can I pause you right there? Is Tom in town? Cause Tom's from California Is he just visiting?

[00:09:36] Tom's in town cause his dad's in town on business Got it, okay He doesn't live in town, he's just visiting Here's what happens They meet, it's love at first sight They skate all night They fall in love Tom tells her Oh you know I'm going back I think to Los Angeles I can't remember exactly where we're supposed to be from Because I'm leaving town like in a couple of days And she says well tomorrow night is the big winter carnival Or whatever it was Can you come and skate some more And we can hang out at the winter carnival

[00:10:05] It'll be like our last date And he says I'll be there So then later Kate foolishly realizes Oh she has to work like a booth at the carnival She's already agreed to work a booth at the carnival And she has to work there all night long So she goes to her sister Chris And says can you take my place at the booth Even though Kate's the only one apparently qualified To work this booth We'll do the switcheroo You'll work the booth And I can go hang out with this guy who I just met

[00:10:34] But I've fallen in love with And Chris is like okay I'll switch with you It'll be fine So Chris is then leaving The ice skating rink portion to go to her booth And she's talking to her boyfriend And Tom shows up early And sees Chris Of course he doesn't know that she has a twin He thinks it's Kate Sees Chris kiss her boyfriend goodbye And thinks it's the girl he fell in love with yesterday Kissing some other guy So off he goes

[00:11:03] And then Kate shows up for the date And Tom never shows up Cut to 15 years later The Tom Kinder fiasco Love at sea August 17th 2018 Yeah, we get to Christmas time And our podcast takes off Takes off rocket ship Come January We're gonna be faced with the decision Do we keep reviewing these movies On a regular basis Or do we wait until next Christmas And I'm telling you what's gonna happen

[00:11:32] What's gonna happen? We're gonna keep reviewing these movies We would have to have just an overwhelming Response from people that listen For me to do this year round I love hanging out with you Brandon Hey And I love talking about a good movie Or a good bad movie But at some point The dam's gonna break The dam's gonna break Pearl in Paradise August 20th 2018 We got another call? I think we have one more call Book it

[00:12:00] Alright, here we go I just thought the acting was kind of brilliant In general Especially that one guy Chris What was cool about it was like It was almost like being in Fiji The movie took me to Fiji I mean literally the movie took me to Fiji I filmed it in Fiji

[00:12:29] Chris Pla Calling you guys from Orlando I just wanna say, you know Hey, shout out Thank you Chris Oh, of course he called in I will say this One of the nicest guys If you ever get a chance to talk to him One of the nicest guys in the world And was willing to come on our podcast After we did our first episode And then he calls the old hot take line Now Chris, are you there? Is that Dan being nice? Oh my goodness Time out

[00:12:58] Chris is on the show right now He didn't It's cause I've got nothing else to do Dan I mean, Brandon fooled us It's a brand trickery The Christmas Train August 23rd, 2018 My wait what is I don't think the bartender knows what alcohol is Or what it does And so stay with me The first time he goes I'm gonna make you a Grinch Have one And then basically Like you're gonna be wasted for life I think You're gonna be like

[00:13:27] You're gonna think it's Christmas everyday Which by the way That's what he says He says that Two Get ordered Yeah, I ordered two Grinches Tom and Danny Glover Are just like Count me in I don't wanna drink this train One drink I'm gonna be drunk the rest of the world The two guys are supposed to be paying attention to what's happening on the train I don't wanna know what's going on The director of this play And the guy being set up And then later With the fake married couple He's like Something about like A whizzy candy cane or something It'll make you kiss The one you love

[00:13:57] Alcohol doesn't do that But then like When it comes to hot chocolate Like he knows all the tricks of the train He's charging extra for whipped cream He's putting an extra candy cane That is a great I will say this Whipped cream is on the house They got that Crown for Christmas August 31st 2018 This stew has magical You're gonna love what this is by the way This stew has magical powers It transcends Cultural Racial Socioeconomic lines It can It can

[00:14:26] Just meld hearts and minds together We should be pouring bowls of this stew At the United Nations At the White House Like I wanna know more about it Are you ready? I'm ready Mulligan stew Is a dish said to have been prepared by American hobos In camps in the early 1900s Hold on Another variation of Mulligan stew is called community stew It's a stew that's put together by several homeless people How?

[00:14:55] So Okay, that is a with all That is it So how Do the great people of which You're Just Just like The line should have been What do you know about Mulligan stew Dude, Fergus Oh my goodness Just like mom used to make when we were hobos In Windshire Season for love September 7th 2018 Auxiliary means like providing supplementary or extra support That's what that means So I'm confused Like I'm just confused Well, all the men are dying

[00:15:25] That's right So they have to provide And so I wanna know Red Rock's history with that as well Those two are my big one The Hallmarks So could we create A Hallmark mystery movie About the women's auxiliary group Killing all the men The men In Red Rock, Texas I mean Sold and sold Season for death Now Ruth We have had those Wow That got a big laugh there Love and design September 21st 2018 And I think that Hallmark has three giant like wheels

[00:15:55] And they just spin one wheel And it's just like home and garden show Design show Food Food show Adventure Something And then they spin another wheel And it's a relationship wheel It's like Same job Hate each other Right Competing this Old high school sweethearts Blah blah blah And then the third wheel Is all smiley face emojis And they spin it anyway And that's how they make a movie Okay Or when they're actually dancing To their song

[00:16:25] On the purple I thought that's what you were gonna go with You would think I was gonna go with that Yeah But then Yolo Sparrow And here's why For me I saw Yolo Sparrow in concert They were amazing Let me take a Yolo Sparrow The most wonderful time of the year September 28th 2018 I get what you're saying But to Amber's point I mean we've just met this guy And he's borderline homeless With no identification Except for a passport That we don't know is real Sure he looks like Michael Peña meets Viggo Mortensen With the voice of Sean Mullins

[00:16:54] But it doesn't It doesn't mean That he's trustworthy And I think that a kid I'm gonna need you to Slow it down a little bit I'm sorry Michael Peña Yeah And that reference Does anybody remember Sean Mullins? He sang the song Everything's Gonna Be Alright But he talked the voice The verses Can you do it for me? It's kinda like Nashville With the tang Yeah yeah yeah I got it now He That guy had his voice But he was a combination Of Michael Peña And Viggo Mortensen At least in my mind Truly

[00:17:24] Madly Sweetly October 5th 2018 Full disclosure I like Fall Time more than I like I think Christmas What? Which is I love Fall Time We're gonna have to edit a lot of this out Because we've No, no, no Do you like Fall? Like Fall Time More than Christmas The season of Fall Between October November That month Leading up to Christmas I'm This whole time is just wonderful Those are two different colors But I like the Fall colors Those are two different colors Do you like Fall The Foliage Do you like the foliage of Fall

[00:17:54] More than you like Thanksgiving to Christmas There's no way the answer is yes It can't be The Foliage here in Greenville Is not that It's not worth saying yes But I love the pumpkin spice lattes Yeah, but then you get the Oh dear, sweet gracious But then you get the Peppermint mochas It's a one for one there Oh Gosh, I love peppermint mochas As soon as Yeah that Guys tune back in next week One person is gonna get to win a Skype call A Skype date With Dan You guys get to drink Peppermint mochas We did not

[00:18:23] None of that was exciting This is happening None of that was discussed Yeah, it's gonna be a five hour Skype set No, no, no, no What Dave Ramsey comes on the movie And helps them budget appropriately So that they can get Breaks out the envelopes And he helps them And that would be a fun movie to watch Okay, let's do this right now If we If you guys out there Get the hashtag Dave does Dave does deck the hallmark Oh my goodness If you get it trending on Twitter I think Ramsey will come on

[00:18:52] We will pay him Whatever he wants in his Yeah Podcast on We'll pay off all of his unsecured debt Dude, I'm the one that came up And he was just Reckless I did it for the flyer miles They always get me They're like Just get these points Just get these points Just get these points Oh my gosh The Christmas card October 12th, 2018

[00:19:20] Faith and Cody are in the church together And they're making eyes at one another The entire time And he stared at her While they're singing the carols While they're singing the carols While they're singing the carols Let me tell you When I was a kid growing up in church And there was that cute girl in church I made eyes Like during the singing I'm, I'm, you know I should have been worshiping the Lord But there were times Where I was checking out the girl Did you turn back And like shrug like you didn't know how to sing? Like it was this weird Like she keeps turning And like her shoulders keep going up She was doing a weird jig It was like a weird

[00:19:49] Like a sheepish smile and a shrug Like I'm sorry I'm in front of you and singing It was a very weird bit Look, I thought it was cute I remembered it I was like What is she trying to portray here? It got me Okay, it got me Hey, reminded of those early days of flirting While trying to worship the Lord Ooh, those were the days The difference though Is that there was no girl giving you eyes back That's true I'm really still less tone deaf than this film Somehow Somehow

[00:20:20] Dottie is Faith We didn't mention that Right, sorry They call Faith Dottie because they have a dot system Because she likes to count the dots For counting wood Which could easily just be There are this many blocks All you have to do is go I counted And there's this many I, I still don't understand So if it's five dots It's a full block? Well you add an extra one So the, the, the You make five And then when you cross it through To make a block It's actually six From what I understood Yeah, but But something to do with the size of them All I know is this What makes a not, what

[00:20:50] It was the least efficient Counting system of wood That you could possibly come up with You would have been I just want to know the, I just want to know the origin story I would love to hear If somebody could explain the dot system to me How are we going to count all these? I got an idea I got an idea We make five, six You know what? That's the best You take the rest of the day off That's that dungeon Where if we said there's five No, that's six

[00:21:19] What is that? It was very confusing Oh my goodness You would have been better with an abacus And you could have literally There might be people out there who haven't seen the movie And are like, what are they talking about? We don't know We don't know We are unsure of the dot system It would have made a lot more sense to have a four year old and a crayon Writing a number down Here's 300 wood blocks That would have made more sense than the dot system Falling for you, October 19th, 2018 What you're thinking of is the boom mic

[00:21:47] That mic is camera like in size It is camera like in size And I can see why you would think that is a boom mic I'm glad you pulled that up on your phone though You were right, I was wrong Thank you I have no problem We took it to the tape and the tape doesn't lie Took it to the tape and the tape don't lie Took it to the tape and the tape don't lie Took it to the tape and the tape don't lie Christmas at Pemberley Manor, October 29th, 2018 This is our first Real episode Real episode Where we are reviewing a movie that came out yesterday Wow This is amazing This feels great

[00:22:17] We have, let me, can I set the scene? Please do Set the scene, Brian We have Hallmark Channel on right now behind us So that we can kind of look over and just get a little Mary Cherry Mary Cherry Okay And we've got We've got some homemade hot chocolate We have that All three of us have the mugs And I will say that this hot cocoa is delightful Yeah, it's exceptional My sweet wife Yeah And with marshmallows She said I'm going to bed and I said no you're not You're not gonna edit that out are you? No Okay I love you

[00:22:48] All I want is the marshmallows at the bottom of my cup and I just can't get them I got plenty right here, plenty of mallows You want some of those? No, I just, they all sunk Yeah I drank the whole drink This is great, this is great stuff You guys can see it, that's it Yep So, did you get them? Okay Okay Just slowly but surely, there they go Wow Mmm, thank goodness Is it worth it? Mmm Mmm Mmm Christmas Joy, November 8th, 2018

[00:23:14] Some of you are listening to this after watching us on Good Morning America Hi Hey Now, that's a sentence that I never thought that I would have said Never thought that I would say And yet here I am Unbelievable How are you guys? In a post-Good Morning America world Wow We did it Yes I hope you like what you saw I hope you like it I think you looked great Thank you, I thought you looked And we're super excited to welcome our guest today, Michael Strahan Michael, how are you? I'm doing well That's not Michael Strahan That's not Michael Strahan

[00:23:43] I don't even know if we can, you know God bless him Put that on the air God bless him Yeah Ben drives all the way up to Washington D.C. Puts on his tux for the gala Goes in to the gala Sees Joy talking Looks around And all the servers Have the same tux that he has on Which is a classic black tie event tux Nothing wrong with it It looks great One of them goes Hey, we gotta go get champagne from the back Like all the servers are wearing this tux And he goes

[00:24:12] Oh gosh darn it I can't fit in And he rips the tie off And he goes back He's like I did it again I wore the servers tux I don't even know what to do in the big city No one ever tells me I always do the opposite of what I should do He's in his nicest tux and it's like

[00:24:28] Yeah, that's what people are wearing their tux Now Michael Murray just feels He may as well be in a surfing film Like he's in a different world There was like a couple of like Hang loose bro Yeah, there's a couple like What's up?

[00:24:56] I'll just refer you to Danica McAlligar and Andrew Walker Now Danica McAlligar is an Irish Danica McAlligar lookalike Danica McAlligar Yeah, Danica McAlligar The whole McAlligar family Don't trust them No, I wouldn't Wouldn't trust them Swindlers It was a very weird way to try and paint Chad Michael Murray's character out to be a good guy So many things you could have done And instead he's like I don't really like my brothers

[00:25:25] But I sent him a box of food Some people Some people Some people spend money to sponsor a kid For compassion in Africa That's right No, I'm gonna sponsor my brother Can you imagine like Sarah McLaughlin In the arms of Hi, I'm Danny Derek and David live comfortable lives But wouldn't you know it? They need non-perishables Could you send them just one canned goods? Could you give them 27 cents this day? One time? Derek and David are like, Danny what are you doing?

[00:25:55] Even just peanut butter Even just peanut butter will do That's right That's right That's the ultimate way What for me? That is just unreal Marrying Father Christmas November 10th, 2018 There's a pastor in the film Who tends to be the go-to actor Yes Of a certain type for Hallmark And he was in the other movie I watched that even wrote to Christmas And he does like counseling with him And it's kind of this weird bit But at the wedding They're doing his vows the whole time He's performing the ceremony

[00:26:24] And like I have some relatives that are pastors And like I've seen a lot of wedding ceremonies performed And he goes Ian and such and such have these vows they've written for you And he walks off He legitimately just leaves In his defense It's Christmas Day They end up coming on Christmas Day I hope they pay him to give him well for that My man is like Alright, I feel like I'm good here I don't want to hear your vows It says to exit stage right I'll take their word for it He walks All he has to do is stand still

[00:26:52] Yeah, you're married already That's right I mean his premarital wasn't really all that intense No it was not Hey, you guys love each other? Yeah Do you chill out? Okay, we're good It's Christmas Eve November 12th, 2018 Justin, you said that gloves bother you? I want to hear a little bit more about that So can you kind of give us your thesis on that? I just I get claustrophobic My hands especially My hands are warm But they're also screaming like Why? Why? And like

[00:27:24] That's my favorite That's my favorite moment on our podcast so far My hands are screaming like Why? Why? I love it And I can't control it You know, my hands They have a mind to their own They do That sounds a lot worse than I'm gonna correct too Justin, I wouldn't advertise that, bud I wouldn't advertise it That's actually the name of Leigh-Anne Rimes' new single Oh my gosh The hands are mine on their own Christmas in Love November 15th, 2018

[00:27:53] First of all, they said that a Kringle when you make them could be and I want to get this right as small as a pizza No, no, no bigger than a pizza smaller than an airplane tire That was the sizing Now I get it that pizzas can be any size We've all had the bagel bites and so I get the small Kringles I get it But an airplane tire That's a big tire I don't know if you've ever seen an airplane tire but there is not an oven There's not a fryer

[00:28:22] that makes a Kringle that big Maybe it's like a perspective thing like an airplane tire when we look up at it in the sky Like it's a perspective So basically the same size as a bagel bite Yeah, same size So it's one size fits all Yeah, that did not make any sense to me at all I'm curious as to how corporate has never thought Do you know how we can make money all year? We make Kringles all year

[00:28:52] instead of just for one month Say, Steve, these iPods are really doing well in December What do you think we expand these bad boys? Well, you do have a good idea In this particular reenactment Steve Jobs is played by Foghorn Leghorn Well, I say, I say, I say, I say, I say Let's make some iPods A Veteran's Christmas November 16th, 2018 Here's the deal In one of the scenes

[00:29:19] He asked her when they first meet Joe and Grace He looks at her and he says So, are you a vet? And she goes Or a veterinarian Actually uses the full term And she goes, no, yes, I'm a veteran I want to point out that that's a very simple answer No, no, no, there's a veterinarian and a veteran Yeah, one is not the same as the other They're not the same She was literally struggling She's like, well, kind of, pretty much

[00:29:48] And I want to point out that no, you're not Yeah, yeah Next year there will be a movie called A Veteran's Christmas Yeah, A Vet's Christmas A Vet's Christmas And if you're a veterinarian And you don't stand You don't stand

[00:30:17] They're not the same thing I just want to point that out They're not the same But if you, if you fought for our country And you want to call yourself And you want to call yourself a vet You call yourself a vet Let's just make it clear But I want to point out, he doesn't ask her that He asks her, are you a veterinarian? That's right, I don't know She is confused by that question It's a great way to watch It really is I want to know who the dog trainer was for Justice

[00:30:46] Because they did too good of a job Grace is really into Justice Like, oh, just such a good dog Like, really doing the full bit And Justice is standing at attention And staring in the distance Like he wants nothing to do with Grace And Grace is supposed to have trained dogs For a living And she is really trying to love on the dog And Justice is like, I got to stare at my master Or I don't get the treat You can pet me all

[00:31:14] I got a job to do I got to get that biscuit You can pet me, but I'm going to get the biscuit Don't distract me with everything I'm getting the biscuit I do love this love, but I love that biscuit Christmas at Graceland November 20th, 2018 Look, I do think that Kelly Pickler Treated the script like Ron Burgundy treats a teleprompter If it was not on there, she did not read it Yes I really, like, this is a movie where Kelly Pickler's character

[00:31:44] Sings Silent Night four different times And on the third time she asked for help with the words That all happens in the movie And look, I'm sorry Like, I don't know how to get around that And she was asking her daughter Her daughter was like, you need help with the words, mama? Like, it's kind of a fun bit But still, she, of all the songs to sing for her big performance She sings Silent Night four different times And also, she's a character that grew up singing in Memphis, Tennessee

[00:32:11] And when her mama died, she said, you know what? I got to go become an investment banker I don't know what else to do I'm quitting the singing life And I'm gonna go work for a big wig bank in Chicago, Illinois Return to Christmas Creek, November 21st, 2018 It's time for presents! Oye, presents! He looked around and said, I've brought you my presents

[00:32:42] Which one? I'm gonna go with a T I'm gonna go with a T I'm gonna go with an S It was... No, presents with an S No, no, no, no, no They both have S's in them You dummy E-N-C-E presents Hey, you found the workaround, buddy I'm gonna go with the one with the P I'm gonna go with the one with the C You would've been right had you known how to spell both presents So, um This is what Uncle Harry says Word for word Stay with me

[00:33:11] I know I've not always dealt with things in the right way I've said a lot of things that I'm proud of No, he did not He did Go look it up I've said a lot of things that I'm proud of That's what he said I would love to be wrong You rewind it? I rewound it three times I've said a lot of things that I'm proud of Her mom's Danish?

[00:33:41] Like, I'm confused Dutch? What is it? It's Danish The Netherlands are Dutch Denmark's Danish Danish is a food It's a food... Homonym alert! Okay, what Danish are you around? I got it, I got it, I got it And then I looked at Marv and I said, hand me that Danish Ooh, ooh, the one with the H The one with the H You got me there It was actually a tiny Danish person

[00:34:15] I'm sorry I apologize to all the Danes out there Especially anyone listening Especially the great ones Alright, which games are we talking about? And I said, I brought the Dane over and said Who's a good boy? I'm going with the person You nailed it! You nailed it! Yeah! Oh man, we have gone off the rails here Just a hair Letters to Santa November 22, 2018 Guys, I feel really assaulted right now

[00:34:46] Insulted, that's the word I wanted to use We're not assaulting you, that's for sure No, insulted, I feel offended I feel assaulted by how insulted I feel They sound more similar than you would think That's right It's time for... No, no, no, no No, no, no, no No, it wasn't Don't cheapen it, okay? If there's a homonym, we'll do the game But there isn't one yet A God wink Christmas November 23, 2018 I felt like God was winking at me to turn this movie off On a number of occasions

[00:35:15] This movie should be called A God Winks Christmas Rich People Problems Reunited at Christmas November 26, 2018 D-E-C-K-Y That's still Ducky Ducky What you guys don't know is I tried to do that for the opening And Dan said, record it again And so I'm gonna make it What I wanna do is I wanna do S-A-T-U-Y D-A-Y D-E-C-K-T H-E Hallmark

[00:35:43] Where did you go with H-E? T-H-E T-H-E Okay Well it doesn't work Spelling It's never been my strong suit And you know that And you're exploiting it We did it A thousand by Thanksgiving That's exactly right We did it except somehow Apple emailed us and they couldn't put 400 or so We lost 400 of them So if you could help us out And get those 400 back for us And get us up to a thousand that would be wonderful We got Johnny iTunes on the line Johnny how are ya? Hey what's up I'm Johnny iTunes

[00:36:13] What happened to the 400? You know they got lost on a truck somewhere That's not how reviews work Yeah it is I'm reviewing you one star Thank you Johnny It is time for today's Have your pet spayed and neutered I thought that the plot was really interesting And divergent from what we've seen before Divergent? You mean it diverged? Divergent from what we've seen before I'm standing by that Guys are you Kate Wenslett Insurgent Are you a Ronifor

[00:36:42] Are you a Are you a tiger or are you a Pterodactyl Me too What's your tattoo? Rim shot Panda I don't know the divergent series Oh I just said three words I don't know anything No You could've said anything I said Ronifor That's not a thing But that could've been I saw the movie and I don't remember anything in it It was terrible It was not great God bless you Welcome to Divergent

[00:37:11] That's actually gonna be what we do after Deck the Hallmark We've been talking about doing a Patreon And the Patreon's gonna be devoted to the Divergent We're gonna watch Divergent every week for a year Oh no, no, no, no I don't wanna watch Hallmark movies How much? How much money? I get paid six figures a year to watch Divergent Guys, make it happen If you pay me $100,000 a year I'll watch Divergent every week No, every day Oh, good gosh I think I'm out I can't do that I think I'm out I literally can't do that No, no, no So, anyway, I really like the story Five days a week

[00:37:43] Insurgent's in there too though And Resurgent And Assurance And Insurance What about Astringent? Astringent So you like the good At the end of this movie How many times in a row Do they say Merry Christmas? It's five Five? Brandon, what's your guess? How many times in a row do they say Merry Christmas? Let's go with a seven What if I told you it was eleven? What?

[00:38:12] It's eleven They say Merry Christmas eleven times In a row to finish this movie Literally, it's like everybody in the Walton family saying goodnight to each other Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas Eleven times You can look it up It's eleven times Read a book I counted And I couldn't believe what I was seeing Like I thought I was so tired I watched these out of order It was like 1.30 in the morning

[00:38:42] And I was like Did they just say Merry Christmas for 30 straight seconds? And then it just ends There are screenwriters going How do we end this movie? What if we have them say Merry Christmas? Not enough They gotta do it more than once What about I don't know Half dozen times Nah Let's go with twelve Back it up a little Gary Okay, let's play this out It's a baker's dozen Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas

[00:39:11] Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Merry Christmas That was eleven They do that In the actual movie And after we finish recording You can look it up It's a thing that happened I can't believe it And somehow That was an actual ending To an actual movie This thing is a piece of celluloid That should never be seen By anyone ever again It's a dumpster fire I hated it Christmas at the palace November 26th, 2018 I love Underline

[00:39:40] Hyphen Asterisk There's no hyphen This movie No, you cannot L-O Hyphen I love V I love V I love V I love V I love V I love V Pride, Prejudice, and Mistletoe November 27th, 2018 Since we're all piggybacking Or piggyback I believe is what you said I don't know what that is I don't know I'm not a big pig guy You're not a big pig I'm a piggyback I'm a piggyback I don't like all the backs I'm gonna pick what she said

[00:40:10] And continue it All in the back of it On the back That's right Makes more sense than piggybacks Look, Christmas everlasting November 28th, 2018 Lucy finds a trunk full of quilts With a tag on all those quilts That say This guy With a trunk They all say Ma'i Ma'i Ma'i The tag that says It is pronounced for Maeve Who's Eve is it? It's Ma'i

[00:40:41] I don't usually use the word elegiac When I think of Hallmark Wow But this one This one left me empty and sad Like all good Christmas movies should That's right That's right We found the one person Who's more pretentious with his words Than Dan How dare you How dare you Jonathan Shapiro and I Are starting our own podcast Where you just say big words Back and forth Big words with John and Dan It's gonna take off Clear your calendar Jonathan Tell Billy Bob Thornton

[00:41:10] You have to put that on hiatus I love that there's not only A friend quilting club But also they have rules Like you know the first rule Of friend quilting club is You have to finish it in the house You started it in Like that's what we're gonna ride Or die by You cannot take that quilt So help me You take that quilt out of that house You see what happens Which we actually thought Was a great idea For our quilting group guys That's right But ours we shouldn't We don't talk about the quilting group We don't For our quilting group That's right

[00:41:40] You don't talk about it That's right Just forget what we just said That's right Doesn't exist Take it out and post Mom to Mom's the word on the quilting group That's it Dan Christmas at Honeysuckle Lane November 29th 2018 First thing that Made me go wait What was just The brother in general Oh yeah His whole His whole way of life Yeah Was just a He was so emotional And so uneven And so like

[00:42:08] I can't believe that you would do this without asking But then he does something crazy Like selling the house And he's always holding things Yes They go down on Christmas 40 And he's like in the fetal position Holding a gift that he's dropping And I'm like what is with this Is he a sleepwalker? I don't know He's holding plates of cookies He's a weird guy He's like Linus But less likable Oh my gosh I just was not a fan I kind of wanted it to fall apart Just I just wanted to be like

[00:42:38] They left you nothing in the will We're selling the house Your wife's leaving You're like I just wanted you to just be like Like sorry dude You don't You just You're bad Whoa He was not a great character A shoe addict's Christmas November 30th 2018 Mrs. Fulton that owns the store Which is Fulton's I guess Is what we're calling it Sure Get off your high horse lady Look I have no problem With you wanting to plan A very upscale gala But if you're gonna plan an upscale gala

[00:43:07] Maybe don't hire a fireman And a human resources manager Like Either Hire someone And plan a big Uppity deal Or Have your human resource manager And the fireman Break out the snow machine From the attic Like those are your two options Okay Mingle all the way December 3rd 2018 If there's a scene that Gave me Or elicited any sort of Feeling on the Richter scale It's gonna be The old Richter scale

[00:43:37] The feels Richter scale The old 6.2 On the Richter scale Of feels It's a feel quake It's a feel quake Good gosh Pick any other type of scale For the love of everything I don't know that many scales Make up wire The feels scale The flat feel scale The feel Okay Feel scale Okay Feel scale On the feel scale This gave me like a 2.2 Okay And it's when She falls off the ladder Into his arms It was cute It's a classic bit there There wasn't a lot here

[00:44:06] So the feel scale Like follows the same Like number On a 1 to 10 It's a 1 to 10 Okay So it's not like a hurricane Category No No It's not a category And the Richter scale Doesn't go up to 10 Does it It does Okay I believe It's a feels cane Everybody just gets all wound up And there's a 5 It's a what? Feels cane Feels cane I'm not good at this Just stop talking I've had a feels NATO That sounds like It's EF4 That sounds like It's inappropriate A feels NATO Emotional feels 4 Christmas Wonderland December 4th 2018

[00:44:35] If you could be in the car With any three musicians Who would it be? Bonnie Raitt Bonnie Tyler And Bonnie Jenkins Now you don't know Bonnie Jenkins But she is in a Hoobastank Folk cover band And she's wonderful Probably the best Of the three Bonnies I would definitely Have the Three Bonnies What would What would a Hoobastank album For Christmas Be called? It'd be called

[00:45:05] Stank Your Own Christmas That's what it would be called I don't think it would Fit them well There are some people That I Dream guessed For me On this podcast One is Dan Dave What's his name? Ramsey Ramsey And the second Is Hoobastank A DZ The whole band If they come out With Stank Your Own Christmas We have to have them on Oh absolutely Once Upon a Christmas Miracle December 6th 2018 So I have an alternate

[00:45:35] Title to this movie And if we have to Take it out That's fine We'll just see how The night goes Christmas Delivered Oh god That's bad Christmas Delivered Could have been watching It's a Wonderful Life Guys I don't know What to say Just skip the Polar Express twice Oh no That's all you gotta do No no Hot chocolate Oh my gosh That movie's fantastic It is fantastically awful You're fantastically You know what We can talk more about this At another juncture

[00:46:05] Not only does he hate Hallmark movies He doesn't like The Polar Express This guy's Satan In a black shirt Calm down Over there I love Christmas movies That are well made The Polar Express Just isn't one of them Wow It's getting cold Love you Santa Before we dive into our Wait what Last Vermont Christmas December 10th 2018 Next Lane The real estate Mogul

[00:46:35] Slash I guess Pseudo villain Of the film Early in the movie She looks at Nash Dead in the eyes And goes Do I look like a Donut person to you Right Yes Lane You do Because you're a human being Because you're a human being Everyone looks like a There's one thing I learned From Danica McKellar And Andrew Walker Everybody Everybody loves donuts No exceptions Don't even give me that Garbage lane Hope at Christmas December 12th 2018 You know another thing That I once did with a Christmas tree is We came home and we Realized we had

[00:47:05] Our Christmas tree was Too big Been there And so for whatever reason Instead of cutting from the bottom Because the top was hitting the roof You didn't cut the top The top was hitting the roof And so I cut the top off What a rookie move And I was like well that was really dumb It was not your best And I say I like Christmas I don't know how to cut a tree Panda Never make asparagus for me I can promise you Asparagus burn Really good

[00:47:35] Got me No I just We have all the jokes We do Someone somewhere Is going to be like I would never thought You're an asparagus joke And got them We got them I'm on the bingo cards Dave Ramsey loves A good asparagus joke Got my produce envelope The little girl is How old are we saying She is in this film I'm going to go Nine or ten

[00:48:04] She asks At one point What is a Gingerbread house Competition No No No And at some point You just have to look And say like What's wrong with you What word did she What word did we lose her on That's my question This is Was it from the beginning Or I don't know Ginger Wait a minute Wait a minute Alright you threw bread In the mix Now I'm confused And now there's a house What did you do Is it a loaf of ginger

[00:48:35] Where's the competition In this I don't understand Are only redheads allowed Oh man Start over Start over Let me get my Let me get my whiteboard out Diagram it out She then proceeds to build A mansion Yes she does And wins the competition She's a savant She's a gingerbread house She's like house That's right I only know one That's right Man That's right I love that

[00:49:03] Homegrown Christmas December 17th 2018 I would like to know more Maybe about This principle Now this principle Is one of my favorite Humans in the world Because He goes up there And he's like It's It's It's time to talk about Let me get all the adults On the floor Cha cha real smooth What's up

[00:49:34] He was my favorite The line there There are no mistakes Only decisions Yeah No I didn't quite I didn't quite understand that No I really Had trouble wrapping my head around it So it's almost like I don't think that's a real thing Isn't a bad decision A mistake I feel like It's a decision I feel like mistakes and decisions Can both exist Independently Of one another If my son Were to put his hand On a hot burner I wouldn't say

[00:50:03] That was a That was a decision That was a decision That was a mistake That was a mistake That was a mistake Let's not do that decision again This movie was a decision If I've ever seen one Memories of Christmas December 18th 2018 My kids Who were two and a half Had hot cocoa For the first time During the snow day Oh really And it was awesome They loved it Yes And then one of my

[00:50:33] My twins He believed That That hot chocolate Like he was trying To find different ways To get more hot chocolate And so one of them Was like He hurt himself Or he'd get sick He would be like Oh mama Boo boo I need a hot chocolate drink He would literally Like fall on purpose And bang his head And he'd be like Oh my He would legitimately Hurt himself I need a hot chocolate drink And we're like No No That's not how that works Can I say this One of the best parts Of being an adult

[00:51:03] Like it finally dawns on you In your early 20s Is when you can get Whatever you want Whenever you want it And no I doubled up on hot pockets I'd eat a whole box At one time That's right That's two Who's gonna stop me We wouldn't recommend That under any circumstance It was actually I lied It was a lean pocket Yeah Oh I definitely wouldn't Recommend that Lean pocket Oh my gosh What is your problem Lean pocket's so bad They didn't even They didn't even Worry about the jingle They're like Let's stick with The hot pocket jingle Oh my gosh It's like It's like going to Cece's Pizza And eating the salad bar With the ranch dressing

[00:51:33] Welcome to Christmas December 19th 2018 For $30 You can get a year Subscription to Canada Mag Canada Mag Canada Mag Now I don't want to Talk bad about The Canadians No You should But if you have $30 Unless you are A Canadaophile Most of us are I mean Between the fur trade And the barren wasteland Of winter I mean there's a lot There I will say that When I subscribe To Canada Mag They have a great Discount on mooses

[00:52:02] Going on Yeah But that's Canadian Dollars Which is still more Expensive You're right And so it's not They price And sells out For me There was a Buy one Get one I do want to Make sure It's moose It's not mooses Nope it's meese No meese Mooses No Do you remember The mayor of Toronto From a few years ago Oh he was snorting the cocaine He was great Yeah he was This is a weird bit You can read about it In a Toronto mag It's Canada mag Or you can give What did I say Toronto mag You said Canada mag And Toronto mag Yeah The sister Do you get both Sister publication Is it like a southern

[00:52:32] Living country Living thing It is How about just donate to American Leprosy Missions Instead Just drives me absolutely Crazy in Hallmark films When parents cut their Kids off In the middle of a Really heartfelt Conversation They're like Time to go to bed This It happens all the time But this dad Is the king of it Yeah He's just They're in the middle Of something deep The daughter's opening up And he's like Oh man Go to bed It happened in Christmas at Graceland She comes out

[00:53:02] And wants to play The piano with Kelly Pickler And she's like Sweetie go to bed And then at Christmas joy Or hope at Christmas One of the One of the bookstore And she's like Mommy it's Christmas break Can I stay up and read And she's like No I think we're all Praying each night That we can go Through our whole lives Without having a real Conversation with our kids And so the minute My son comes To try to talk to him He's like Hey You ruined a good thing You ruined a good thing If Hallmark taught me anything It's don't take your car To the mechanic And don't let your kids Tell you anything Yeah Just don't Yeah For sure

[00:53:32] Exactly Time for me To come home For Christmas December 20th 2018 Guys I'm gonna go All in guns blazing It's the last scene Of this movie Which is the dumbest movie Seen in a Hallmark film This year Let me get my violin Go for it Guys They're pulling instruments Out of nowhere I mean they're just It's like Freddy comes down With the drum I mean The middle guy Wasn't there before He wasn't He just shows up Out of nowhere I thought that was A southern thing too

[00:54:01] My favorite part Of this movie Guys your families Doesn't have a fiddle player That comes on Thanksgiving On Christmas Day We keep them locked away That's right Yeah yeah That's right Wait you guys didn't watch The deleted scene No we missed it There's a deleted scene Where he emails A sound memo To everybody That's right Yeah yeah yeah Hey

[00:54:31] I know They're showing that I haven't written This song yet But you're gonna all Know it Trust me We're all gonna Choreograph it perfectly I like the fiddle player And he's like Johnny listen I don't know what I got But I got something And you need to be there For it Just be ready It's Christmas Day man Be ready Get there This is more important

[00:55:00] Be ready And then he has to hide The fiddle player's hiding In the closet He's like This is my moment That was the weird That was a weird scene First of all I want to know more About the banker Because apparently The taste of the candy Determines the loan And I Like I want to know How he's still in business And but it does Explain why he's A little bit hefty I want to know About these I want to know About these Jam making machines The jam making machines That are just the devil

[00:55:30] That make jam The machines Make the jam How How do they do it But I'm in to find out I think he's mom Is making brisket And pink applesauce And I want to know How many times They throw up While he And then Well the last one Is the violin player I don't need Any problem On that one So let's just Tamp out of the Bank owner For a second Who literally Is like I don't want To support you With any of our money Oh it's a Oh that's pretty good Those are my With the hallmarks

[00:56:00] Entertaining Christmas December 21st 2018 Panda Kringles Kringles That's not my last name What if it was The panda's not Your first name So Hi panda Panda Kringles Nice to meet you The whole Kringles family Good people Okay If we raise $500,000 For the American Leprosy We will all Change our last name To Kringles Wait a minute Collectively That is incorrect We will change One of our three names To Kringles And it has to be

[00:56:30] This December $500,000 That's a lot of money Yeah Well how much money Am I getting If I have to change My name You're not getting It's non-profit Dan What do you think That means Oh we said For American Leprosy Sorry We'll talk about The specifics Let's keep Oh if we raise $500,000 For us $500,000 Divided by three How much am I No no no This is for charity If you can believe it And I have to change My name to Kringles One of your names You don't have to do Your last name You can even Keep your name If you want That's right

[00:57:00] You can add it It can be a hyphen It can be How long do I have To keep it for Whatever It's a legal thing My first name is Daniel Like I could be Daniel Kringles How many people Do you go around And say your middle name to Like it's never Going to come up That's right I'm Daniel Kringles Thompson Nice to meet you I would wear that As a badge of honor Yeah you would Yeah Northern Lights Of Christmas December 22nd 2018 And I want a little Something like This Zoe is a pilot Who just Inherited an old Reindeer ranch

[00:57:34] So she hops On a plane Because that's What you do When you're a pilot To go check out The ranch One last time Before she puts it On the market Yeah The black market Black market reindeer Tough to come by Just ask Don't have any reindeer On the truck We didn't meet out He's the current Ranch hand He's rough around The edges And he rides a Motorcycle in winter In Alaska What more do you Need to know He's not super happy

[00:58:03] About her selling The place Because that's Where he lives And what Dot He's like Gus The guy Wouldn't want you To sell it To just some Rando And she's like He would want me To because He wants me To buy a plane So he threatens To leave Which is bad Because she doesn't Know the first thing About running A reindeer ranch So she asked him To stick around To try to find The right buyer Plus she'll give him 10% of the sale

[00:58:32] So obviously he stays So The first couple comes And they look at the place But they have boats And stuff So no go I can't So weird things Keep happening One of the reindeer Keeps getting out And ends up At the airport Could it be that They're flying I hope so I've got bad news Spoiler alert Super pumped Super pumped I wrote it

[00:59:02] I wrote it And I was so confident I was like They're going to fly The reindeer We're actually flying It's just a bummer And that's My friends Is the North of the Christmas Easily the best Synopsis we've ever had Oh my gosh What a movie Oh my goodness What I can't believe They didn't fly How did they not fly I can't believe it In a movie About a pilot It's about flying And about reindeer How did they not fly How did the reindeer get out

[00:59:31] Because reindeer can't fly Because Alex can't fix the fence Apparently And at one At one point She's like What was that And she looks up in the sky Not Not the reindeer Not the reindeer A gingerbread romance December 23rd 2018 Who are you My name's And I love Hallmark movies

[01:00:00] My name's Panda I like Hallmark Christmas movies I'm Dan And I despise Hallmark Christmas movies And this Is the Deck the Hallmark Podcast Small Town Christmas Live With Chris Palaha December 24th 2018 First of all And I I want to make sure I'm clear on this We tried a Kringle Kringle No You cannot do that Right now

[01:00:30] Because I have to say That word No less than 10 times In this There's nothing you can do There's nothing you can do It's the rules Don't do it I can't see a single face Out there But look at my eyes Don't do it Okay So we tried one of those pastries On Wednesday Pastries And And We tried one Straight from Wisconsin Racine, Wisconsin O&H Kringle Place Yeah And I didn't see it coming Jonathan Parker

[01:01:00] Who was in his nice Tweed suit Is going to kill us Because we're going to go An hour and a half I'm just talking about right now So Here's the deal The Kringle was delicious And It was so good That Chris told us That this movie Was about Kringle Fest And Here's the thing They're in Wisconsin Where Kringle's Kringle It's this guy It's this guy It's your dad That's my dad That's the problem It's your father Unbelievable

[01:01:29] It all makes sense now Brandon's dad I just looked over And saw a silhouette And he goes I'm his dad We spoke earlier And you know how much I appreciate you guys And how proud I am Of you And what you've accomplished And what you're doing I think Is a lot of fun It's community building And your hearts Are in the right place And you bring a lot of people Joy and laughter And I love You can feel the love Even from Grumpy Dan It comes through Loud and clear

[01:01:59] Guys So what you're doing Is particularly You know Just particularly Today Every generation Needs a laugh And you guys Are providing it It's awesome Thank you I'm happy to be part of the ride Chris Palaha Merry Christmas Chris And go see Chris Palaha Merry Christmas Everybody Yeah Christmas for the books December 27th 2018 On Christmas Day At their house We have the best Asian food It's wonderful Egg rolls Crab ring I'm a legend of this I've had her egg rolls

[01:02:29] They're crazy good King crab legs Oh my gosh It's just It's stupid good I just eat all day It's so wonderful Hey I'm king crab legs Come on down To king crab legs And get yourself A whale of a deal I don't understand Whales are also In the ocean I got it But it's just like Kind of the same No no it's not great But I want to eat there now These crabs are Royally delicious Yeah Yeah

[01:02:59] That's right Open up your text messages Go to the Go to the fifth message Do it right now Go to the fifth message Okay And read the third Not the last message But the third from the last message And this is your horoscope For the next week She had an infected eye Or something And keeps making me look at it Merry Christmas Merry Christmas Please thoughts and prayers For the panda's infected eye Christmas at Grand Valley December 28th 2018

[01:03:29] Hallmark is in a poker game With themselves Over what can be The crappiest ice rink Like every Yeah the ice rink's on That ice rink is In bad shape There is Leaves Leaves It has got a Solid three inches Of snow just on top Like Early on there was a movie And now they're all Running together Where they skate And I was like It can't get anywhere Oh yeah Christmas everlasting There's like trees And lights out on the ice That thing is like It's hazardous The South Trenton ice rink Compared to the one

[01:03:58] Every time we go further It's like these ice rinks Get worse and worse Sooner or later It's just going to be A circle of ice And everybody's just got Ice skates on their fingers And they're just Doing triple lutses And axles And it's the Finger skate Olympics And then they can go Look up their fortune In a book Finger book Fortune Jingle Around the Clock December 31st 2018 And so it was so fun And rewarding Yeah we want to do A lot more We have some other things Where these characters

[01:04:27] Might go next And then some other fun ideas It's a great world To be part of Jingle Around the Clock 2 Colon The Christmas copy Maybe Even jinglier Even jinglier The jingliest of all The jingliest of all It's just like In a world Yep Christmas bells are ringing January 1st 2019 We're going to be Getting emails And I just see it Like Panda Where are you talking about Danny was adopted Danny was adopted

[01:04:57] For the love of Everything good and decent Danny's adopted No one's got a magazine In January What the Christmas spread Is that movie Panda Christmas made to order January 2nd 2019 The very first one I have to point out Is one of the scariest scenes In a movie we've watched This Hallmark year Scary for me She's on a ladder In high heel shoes That is terrifying I thought she was going to die

[01:05:27] It was terrifying for me And he offered to help And she said no No Which first of all Props to her But that's a terrible idea There's another movie We're recording tonight Where three people go out For one person To get on the ladder And they get hurt And this girl's In high heels In a ladder Totally fine She's just better Than everyone else But she's also decorating At the same time She's a terrible decorator I want to toss that one out That's a weight What for me in general It's almost like Hallmark makes sure Whatever the protagonist Profession is That they're actually Really bad at it They're bad at it Which is It doesn't make any sense

[01:05:57] It's like I'm Winnie Cooper And I'm an artist No you're not You're terrible at it He's dead He was He was the worst Surly I'm just glad They killed him off I can't believe You're going with that

[01:06:26] So if all the Hardys Are still with us Oh my gosh This is Guys This is really Really bad Winter Castle February 4th 2019 A couple things About this That I thought Were really interesting Check in at 9pm Check out You have to check out Before 9am Why is that What about that Is cool Okay It's 23 degrees To 27 degrees Constantly in the hotel And there's an entire Rigmarole you have to do To even get into bed

[01:06:55] It takes Like it takes Like 30 minutes To actually get to bed And if you have to Use the bathroom You have to go through The process all over again So go back Go back to the Check in check out None of that What's neat about The check in None of that None of that But I hear it's A great experience Just look The check out times Earlier in In your traditional hotel And it's awesome And it's later To check in You gotta see the stars When you check in Actually everything About the hotel Seems kind of miserable When you start thinking I actually Okay real quick So going back to The night time thing It's a 30 minute

[01:07:25] It's a 30 minute process What does that mean So basically You have to go That you can't Get like mummified Well you kind of do So what you end up Having to do Is they have a Separate changing area Where you have to go And my understanding Is they have lockers You have to Like undress Put in like These Like Jimmy John Long John Jimmy John's Jimmy Jams You know what You know what Have a Canadian draw Take the next few plays off Jimmy Jams We have to take I said Jimmy John's Jimmy John's is a sub place Yeah Jimmy Jams Sponsor for the next step Yeah Jimmy Jams

[01:07:55] You have to put on Jimmy Jams And then what you end up Having to do Is you have to Like go to the When do you start Your new job At the ISO This is absurd I spend a lot of time Researching it All that to say This movie's not good They don't know The male species At all Like it is As bad as Hallmark movies are At least whenever We watch one from 10 or 15 years ago They're always like You know women They have to cook And clean This movie is like The male equivalent Of that You know men

[01:08:24] They don't communicate They just grunt And fist bump And play darts You know Have you ever met a man That couldn't resist A good dart game Like what is going on And then the dad Does a bit about Like a husband satellite And you're just like None of these people Have ever met a man I don't think Like it's absurd You know Does she have feelings for him Darts Canadian try

[01:08:53] I mean Just Just doesn't understand North Pole February 11th 2019 Whether it's sweet Whether it's salty It's a Snackers Yeah And that's why You go grab one At your nearest grocery store Right now And if you go to Snackers.net Dot net And you type in the password Dekkie D-E-C-K-I-E D-E-C-K-I-E D-E-C-K-I-E You're going to get 10% off of an order Of 100 Snackers or more Now Once you get them They go bad

[01:09:25] Well and but this is also This is also So get the snacking We're pretty excited about this Because we actually got in On the ground floor Of the Snackers MLM Multi Multi-level market Yeah And so if you sign up Under us Do we have an opportunity For you Because here's what's Going to happen You are going to get Your welcome pack And you're going to be able To sell Snackers To all of your friends And then you can Recruit them To get under you And we make a boatload Of cash Yeah we do We will stop this podcast And just count our money All Snackers all inside

[01:09:54] Kids snacking What was the phrase Whether it's sweet Or it's salty It's a Snackers That's right Everyone talks In Christmas Slogans in this movie They do And just It's over the top They do There's a lot of like Christmas puns In the movie Oh my gosh And then there's a lot of like If such and such Does X Then Y Will happen They do that bit a lot And the Y is always like They'll deck my halls Or they'll rig me up

[01:10:23] By the Christmas tree Or whatever Somebody says You are the deer's ears Yeah And I have questions Because Shouldn't it be Reindeer's That's Chelsea Bailey Madison I don't know what's her name I got it down here It's Bailey Madison Bailey Madison Shouldn't it be the reindeer's ears Didn't you know that Bailey Madison is in Witchcraft What is it Witchcraft She's into witchcraft She practices wick It's the good witch The good witch But she also is a wick Based off of what we just heard From Dan Does she have like a cauldron I'm confused

[01:10:51] She's into witchcraft She's into witchcraft Sacrificing the goats I wrote that a bunch She said My ice is cracked Yeah Snow M.G. You're the deer's ears Snow my goodness Which I don't know why You expanded on Snow M.G. Either it works or it doesn't Why do you ever Yeah What was the word Instead of awesome It's Dazzy Yeah I wrote that down too Dazzy That's Dazzy You know what's Dazzy Snackers

[01:11:21] Will you Will you take any of these And use them in your life Absolutely not Love, romance, and chocolate March 4th 2019 Guys guys guys We make a movie It's called The Three Chocolatiers And we gotta take down Max And we gotta take down Max Okay And he's more dastardly Maybe he has an eye patch Yes I love it And we take him down with Are you ready for it Three Musketeer candy bars But we don't say that No Yeah right Correct We say we're the Three Chocolatiers And here's our candy bar

[01:11:51] To infinity You can stash anything on them cups All for one and one for all All for one and all for one Chocolate No All for all and all for none No All for one and one for all You got it Okay Killed it The Mistletoe Promise March 11th, 2019 Oh before we do We do gotta talk about our sponsor We do gotta It is this brand new company If you can believe it And it's called Ducks Incorporated No Not Ducks Incorporated You go to Ducks Incorporated You're gonna find a whole

[01:12:20] Slow and bad products You don't wanna go there No no no Ducks Incorporated Yeah Ducks Co Ducks Co Yeah and they basically just sell ducks And you can do what you want with them And they sell ducks And they sell them at any age Like most people like to get the chicks But others You just want a full You want a full mallard That's right You want a mallard Full mallard Big quackin' mallard Yep You go to Ducks Co That's exactly right So you go to DucksCo.co.com DucksCo And you show the word is Dot D-O-T So it's D-U-C-K-S C-O D-O-T C-O Dot com

[01:12:50] DucksCo.co.com That's exactly right And you You type in Ducky Yes you type in Ducky And they will send you A random duck And you can kind of You can keep us updated On the ducks And we will We'll start a website Where we kind of give people Updates on the ducks And it's going to be really fun I want to I'll go Because I'm Picky Bicky Backing Say that one more time For everybody We're going to try that One more time Picky Bicky backing That's DucksCo.co.com We'll fix it I'm going to

[01:13:20] I'm going to go now Because I'm going to Picky Bicky So here's I like the decorating scene Andrew Walker returns March 18th 2019 You sent me juice I loved it You sent Panda juice Loved it You love it Dan what did you think Of the juice Now here's the thing Is I No Here's the thing Andrew Is I never got any juice And And I just was under The assumption That The guy

[01:13:50] That despises The movies Just got left Out of the juice Train And I was just like Man Andrew Walker Seemed like a nice guy But he really Man True story I didn't get any juice Andrew But I've heard It's delightful It's wonderful Yeah Dan You probably won't Get any juice Man You gotta start Coming around Oh man Crossword mystery A puzzle to die for

[01:14:19] April 1st 2019 Can I ask you a crossword Please Go for it Yeah This type of gram Happens with sweetness This type of gram Gram Is it a golden gram Nope Is it a teddy gram No I know it It was a graham cracker No It's a candy gram I thought you meant gram Not You Gram is one syllable You would be terrible Because that sounded like A Jeopardy question It's a candy gram

[01:14:50] Candy gram Candy gram Candy gram Candy gram Candy gram Because you're buying For some quarters I did find Oh thank god Brennan Elliott April 8th 2019 I remember the very Very first day we filmed And Mariah Carey Has her own world I mean she's a lovely Lovely lady I remember the first day I got on there And I just finished Working with Lacey And I thought Oh this is the second one Okay I'll work with Lacey I think this is great Let's go do it And we're in Cincinnati And I remember We get on set And Mariah Carey

[01:15:19] Wasn't there We knew she was coming in On a plane or a private jet She was doing music With Justin Bieber Or some crazy thing Outside of my conscience As you do Classic Biebs You know classic Biebs And I thought okay And I remember The very first day of shooting We had one of our producers Who's obviously not a director Or an actor He might even been One of the financial liaisons Between the network Where he goes Alright so we established We gotta block the scene guys We can't wait for her She'll be here Let's block the scene And get something in the can I said absolutely And he goes Have we established this chair

[01:15:49] And everybody looks at him like Because I guess we're sitting on chairs At a table or something And I just looked And I went Wow okay This is gonna be different And it was a lot of fun But it was just It was That's the great thing About Hallmark movies Is that every movie Is It's just a different experience It's not like Some shows You know what you're gonna get into It's in a good way And I actually really Enjoy the excitement Of something different All the time So Christmas under wraps April 15th 2019 He has to be Santa Because if he's not Then we have another case

[01:16:18] Of Hallmark Introducing a reindeer Who you think Is gonna fly But at the end of the day It doesn't fly Can I point out That both of the movies Were in Alaska Isn't that fun Northern Lights of Christmas I love that Make the reindeer fly And somehow The green screen For the Aurora Borealis Got no better No You had the opportunity To make the reindeer fly I will say The science and the advancement Technological advancements For making good green screens Of the Northern Lights Just hasn't advanced It's not advanced In four years Hasn't done it It's hard Wow it's tough

[01:16:47] Morning Show Mystery Countdown to Murder May 13th 2019 Three time NBA champion Rick Fox is there Because I guess he's a detective Now that he's retired From playing ball Rick Fox Three time NBA champion And shows that It's like Remember when I won Three NBA championships Simpler times Movie ends With Billy and Rick Fox Kissing He shoots He scores I love my friend

[01:17:16] It's time for the part Of the show Where we share our Our feels For me it's Duck No I'm kidding For me it's Three time NBA champion Rick Fox My only what the hallmark Is Rick Fox In my mind In my world The Rick Fox In this movie Is three time NBA champion Rick Fox I don't even know His character name In my mind he is Rick Fox So Rick I would love to know After you hung up your

[01:17:45] Your Nikes And you put down the The ball for the last time How'd you get to hold it How'd you get to No How'd you become a detective Yeah that's true That's fair I like that A very merry mix up May 27th 2019 How did Al How did Look He's right here He's climbing up his web Look You're missing it It's right there If you said he's Climbing his web Man we should There should be some music Let's get it started Let's get it started In here

[01:18:16] And the spider keeps running Running Running Running Running Running I can't believe This is gonna make The final cut It is You're not gonna Edit this out No why would I It's a spider Man Live in the studio You are looking live Sailing into love June 3rd 2019 And you said you like the scenery What in blue blazes Are you talking about Well that brings us to The all the feels segment Where I share about my feels And I'll tell you The one feel I got Was the fact that They apparently bought a drone

[01:18:45] Really great boat shots Very nice boat shots With the boat sailing On some man made lake Stop it Stop it It's not the ocean It doesn't matter what it is Just tell me where they are Okay They're in the blue island They're so blue in the entire movie The north They're in the northeast They're clearly in the northeast region Like off Maine Off Maine Off Maine in the ocean Yeah Off Maine In one of the great lakes in Maine It's an ocean They're on an ocean There's not a single tide Or wave in the film There's not even a beach

[01:19:15] It's just a lake I've had it All I have to say Is I really like the drone shots You didn't even think about it You thought they were on the ocean They're not I didn't think they were on the ocean That's the thing No I was convinced They were on the ocean Here's the thing is Pandolf and the people That make the movie I believe Wrote it for them To be on the ocean And they're on some dock In a lake somewhere What are your all What are your all the feels Fanda

[01:19:44] Is it the scenery still Guys They're going to Blue Island My world just got rocked There's not a lot of times On this podcast Where it's just like I feel like I've been Shyamalan on this You're right There's not a wave There's not a one to be found Holy smokes It's got choppy at all Smooth sailing Literally Smooth sailing Guys they might have been On a lake Yeah or a pond Maybe just They found some joker In Toronto Who had like a You know I feel I feel had Yeah I've been Shazammed

[01:20:14] Yeah Shazammed Wedding at Graceland June 17th 2019 You did hear us Allude to this And man am I Excited about it Because Danny Glover Makes gloves He does He's knit some gloves But he doesn't knit them No he does not He's too old for the knit That's exactly right So he has gotten His good friend Ronald And And And Jay Cornwall And They are his Good friends They're the ones

[01:20:43] They're the knit boys And that was actually A band that they were in And And he found them And said Hey would you mind Also knitting for me And they were like We've never done that But they Turned out They learned They learned And they're actually Really good at it And these are hand stitched They're hand stitched Gloves What Danny does do Is he autographs The tag of each one That's right Very tiny autograph Very tiny autograph You can see it If you look closely So if you go to They breathe Which is nice Oh yeah Very breathable If you go to DannysGloves.com

[01:21:14] Backslash Decky Decky Decky Decky DannysGloves.com Backslash Decky Decky You're gonna get 10% off your first order Your first order Of 20 or more Of 20 or more gloves Wow Now that's individual gloves Single gloves That is actually The interesting thing They sell One at a time They sell one at a time Are they gonna be mismatched When you get them Maybe That's part of the charm That's part of the charm Their customer service Isn't where it needs To be right now I got one size Too small One size too big

[01:21:44] That's right And I don't wanna be The downer guys But in July We're gonna have Some real ads And I'm sorry People are gonna be like We're not signing up For those guys Smile sponsors Are gonna be like Why don't we get A return on investment Smile direct club Doubt it Where are the Owls O's at That's what I wanna know Squarespace Squarespace sounds fake

[01:22:15] You know To rent out The roof of the Peabody Is actually free If you can believe it What Yeah And they will do The full table service And everything And it's free Yeah How do you know that I was just kidding Because it's Free Of course You said it so You delivered that line Wow You're a better actor Than anyone in this movie That's I'll take it Have you guys ever seen That meme That's the husky dog That tells a joke And the dog's mouth Is open wide Like hey I just told a joke Haha That's Kelly Pickler

[01:22:45] Delivering every line Like it's just like Like she just tells a line And is waiting for a feedback In response It's so bad Did you just declare You just called Kelly Pickler A husky dog Backtrack Backtrack I'm just saying She's like a meme Yeah There you go There you go There you go That's probably gonna get Cut in post production We got We got a great editor It's not We're running out of time Christopher Palaha And Robin Thomas

[01:23:15] June 21st 2019 Chris Chris I love Chris He's just incredible He's like a son to me Wow I mean you look You look like You'd just be his brother Though if we're being honest Right You and Chris Oh you're too kind You're too kind Hey Flattery gets you Nowhere here But smoke and mirrors Come on Well Look You were in Pacific Rim You were in Pacific Rim He's not in Wonder Woman Until next year So give it to him While you can Robin Yeah How about that How about that Right He's gonna kill it He's gonna kill it How embarrassing

[01:23:45] Is it gonna be When we all go see the movie And he was cut They'll find a way To use that In a Hallmark movie Yeah That's what they'll do Yeah they will They will You know It's kind of hilarious Because I'm on the phone Here talking to you guys While we're actually Rolling here And it'll be interesting For you guys to see If this actually makes it In the film Because they might They might like Cut it out You know what I'm saying But thankfully I'm in the background So you know It's right now

[01:24:14] I'm never in the background And I'm told that I'm never in the background He said You're on the phone In the background Of the shot Yeah Yeah Okay Okay Go up Go up And grab Grab your ear And then look At the camera And wink Maybe just hold up One finger Like hold on One second And then we'll know You're really waving to us I just Yanked my ear I just yanked my ear

[01:24:44] One of these shots Has to make it right Like they don't Throw away that much I just I just Touched my ear again Someone's gonna be watching He has an ear infection Single Santa Seeks Mrs. Claus June 24th 2019 I think you maybe Mentioned it earlier But the way that Steve Guttenberg Acts towards children And some of the things That he says Like sound Yeah Very like Yeah

[01:25:13] If you just look At the script It's pretty bad We wrote down A few of his lines One is Little girls do much better When they're relaxed Yeah That's not good Yeah That's not okay Seven is a great age It's weird Coming to him And then he says At one point I never met a child I didn't like I know he's Santa But he's not He's not He doesn't know he's Santa When he's saying these things So it's pretty creepy There are way more context When those are inappropriate

[01:25:43] Than they are appropriate That's right And that's the first year Everybody Wow Made it all the way through So many good moments Thank you guys for listening If you've been with us Since the beginning I mean The real OG Can't thank you enough Thank you so much We're gonna be back next We'll be back next Tuesday With a new movie And then next Thursday For another Best of Episode Going through the last year Of our podcast Year number two Year two We can't wait Until next time May we be the first To wish you A Merry Christmas

[01:26:14] Deck The Hallmark Is a Bramble Jam podcast It's presented by Friendly TV And recorded live In Greenville, South Carolina At the Bramble Jam Podcast Network Studios It's produced by Brandon Gray You can find out more information At deckthehallmark.com