ExMas (Freevee - 2023) ft. Alonso Duralde

[00:00:00] Hi, I'm Brian and I love free V Christmas movies. I'm Dan and I despise free V Christmas

[00:00:07] movies. I'm Alonzo and I'm free to come in and give me a real Uh, I told give me the honey glow, right? No one cares about the viewers of file like we do we we go above and beyond And so thanks to everybody who's watching us on file if you aren't get over there

[00:01:47] Dth so much to do so much to see so what's wrong with the backstreet signing up for file a TV. That's actually

[00:03:01] You'll never know That's how that works. After 10 is 9. And here's the... Here's my kids learning that. And that's when the gestating begins. I just... You're almost always within a 10 month window of everything that happens yearly. Well, what about this? We're only like five months from Christmas and July. From Bramble Fest. Now that's a countdown we can believe in. Is that enough for you? Is that good? Daniel, the older you get, but they're dreamers. They're dreamers. Like we always say around here, it's bow time. It's bow time. It's bow time. Let's talk about Xmas. It's on Free V, and don't listen to any rumors you've heard. Free V's going nowhere. Reports of their demise are vastly overrated. Yeah. That's right.

[00:04:20] There was one day last week where we mourned.

[00:04:23] We did.

[00:04:24] And then the next day they said, you don't need to mourn.

[00:04:26] And I said, well, what was yesterday about?

[00:04:27] Why did you let me even think it? Now they're not we don't know why yet we then go wrong. We then meet Graham. He's clearly a sad sack. He's Has a deadline of Christmas To finish the pig game that he's working on everyone knows if we don't get the pig game out on Christmas There's another way. I like it's not gonna work. What are we even doing?

[00:05:42] Exactly, and so when his parents call him and ask him when he's coming for Christmas. He says I can't come to see her

[00:05:47] I've got the pig game us you're still family to us and so you're your family exactly right and so he hatches a plan because he's starting to feel like my my my parents love alley more than they love me at this point right so i have to try to sabotage alley and make it look like she's an absolute monster

[00:07:00] well this goes well at first until he basically just tells alley what he's doing and alley's like up the next day. It's Christmas Day and everyone knows that on Christmas Day we do a few things in his family. We go to church, we have a hockey game and we do the one-on-one hockey. Pretty much everybody does, right? Church hockey, right? Church hockey. And it's fun. We're going to go catch her at the airport. And as they're running around the house, they try to get the car to start. Card doesn't start. They got to go out the front door. They open up the front door and who's there? Allie. Allie is there. And they both profess their love for each other and they kiss cut the one year later.

[00:09:41] Graham surprises her with a tiny little, little cookie truck.

[00:09:44] So cookies out of the back of that truck. some rumblings of during the holiday season, which is always exciting when you hear about another movie that typically means that should be, we should watch it. And here we are today, we've watched, it's time to talk about it. We've got four segments to do that. First, we're gonna start with the hot take. It is where we share exactly how we felt about this movie. We're not gonna hold back. Can't make us. And we're gonna start with my good friend, Alonzo. Alonzo, what'd you think about X-mas?

[00:11:01] So I did watch this one last year,

[00:11:02] because I also had been hearing really good things.

[00:11:04] And the first viewing, I was kind of like,

[00:12:01] Not a perfect, not a total success, but I like what they're going for.

[00:12:04] A lot of it works.

[00:12:06] The two leads are really charming.

[00:12:07] The parents are fun.

[00:12:09] So yeah, I pretty much liked it.

[00:12:11] I agree with you, Alonzo.

[00:12:12] I liked this movie a good bit.

[00:12:13] I would say of the things in this movie,

[00:12:16] the thing that like worked the least for me

[00:12:19] is the actual couple themselves.

[00:12:21] I liked both of the actors

[00:12:22] and I thought both the performances were great,

[00:12:24] but like I honestly didn't really care

[00:12:26] if they got together at the end.

[00:12:28] What I really, but this movie was shot in such a way where random things were blurry and it almost looked like it had a really tight focus, tighter than normal. And it gave this movie kind of like a weird look. We'll get to that in a way. What? It also has the fact that, and I don't, like, take this for what it's worth. This is as much fun as I've ever had watching anything Robbie Amell's ever been in. He's really giving himself to the comedy of this, and his timing is funny, and it seems like

[00:15:00] he's really having a blast,

[00:15:02] and I loved watching him in this.

[00:15:03] He was really good.

[00:15:05] But the heroes of this movie are Michael Hitchcock

[00:15:07] and Catherine Greenwood. even when Brandon says he has a heart attack, I had a hard time not laughing, not because that is funny, but because this movie is just filled with like, the cookies have weed in it, and like, just kidding, I wanted you to be in a threesome, and like, let me eat this croissant while I'm hiding under the blankets. Like, there's all these- It's a hairpin turn into tragedy. Yes, it is just completely-

[00:16:22] Well, and I was convinced he was dead.

[00:16:23] Like, that CPR lasted forever, and we get nothing.

[00:16:27] Like, he doesn't move, he doesn't-

[00:16:28] Like, we get none of that. better, to be better people. And so I really hope that folks can come away with the polite way to turn down a three-way. Because I think in a lot of these movies, like for years, the go-to would have been, ick, there's a guy, no thank you. And Steven Emil, like, knocks his drink back.

[00:17:42] Robbie Emil.

[00:17:44] Robbie, sorry, one of them.

[00:17:46] With the Emil we get here. scene is picture perfect. Like he just, everything about the reaction and the scene works so incredibly well, 100%. Go ahead, Brian. We've taken our tutorial off of YouTube in retrospect. But, maybe we'll go to Brinville, general access. You never know. You never know. You never know.

[00:19:03] Well, let's get into the mind. It is, I love when someone says something

[00:20:01] And no one tells her what it means. They're just like, well.

[00:20:02] She tells everyone what she thinks it means.

[00:20:04] Which is like, stop it, basically.

[00:20:06] Yeah, and it is, I laughed really hard.

[00:20:09] It's a really funny scene.

[00:20:10] Very funny scene.

[00:20:11] And then she said it to the dry cleaner.

[00:20:12] Yeah, I'd hit that.

[00:20:13] I'd hit that.

[00:20:14] It's very funny.

[00:20:15] Dan?

[00:20:16] Yeah, I didn't initially have, in all the fields, and then you know what, I had an ice

[00:20:21] cold Heineken straight from the fridge.

[00:20:24] Like, it wasn't just, you know. Can we change them back? Yes. No one in this movie. You can email Sheila and Elizabeth, cause you just changed the rules. No movie's gonna beat it. No, that's all I'm saying. You said the 2023 Monday movies with Alonzo do not count. Why not? Oh, cause they didn't come out that year,

[00:21:41] but we reviewed the series, tough,

[00:21:42] cause then you gotta do all that.

[00:21:43] Can we nominate Madam Webb

[00:21:44] for the giant Pepsi neon sign?

[00:21:47] I've heard about today. It's time. Can we go back and somehow disqualify the 2023 winner?

[00:23:07] Yeah.

[00:23:07] And give it now to the recipe file we saw about a month ago, because the beginning of the movie, as you point out, Layton Meester is making cookies,

[00:24:21] and she opens the oven and pulls out've seen in one of these movies. But he's, because Michael Hitchcock wears those turtlenecks all movie long, and then Robbie Amell is in one in that scene. He does, it seems like his wardrobe is consistent, even when he shows up. I guess, exactly, yeah. Like, it's like, oh, well, if the luggage had shown up, you'd just have more of these terrible ensembles.

[00:25:41] Like, I didn't quite get what we were supposed

[00:25:44] to glean from that. at dinner, Robbie Emil says, well we would have been having the traditional Feast of the Seven Fishes had she not ruined the fishing trip. And I'm thinking, really? You're gonna catch seven different kinds of fish in that ice fishing cabin. That's how that works. Yeah. Yeah, I don't, no, I don't, I don't, like maybe one or two.

[00:27:01] On the bait, you just write what kind of fish you want.

[00:27:05] And then you just throw it in.

[00:27:06] Exactly, the disappointment when you catch a duplicate.

[00:27:08] Ah! So, and again, this is also a thing we have in this country, but proportionally, these Christmas movies are ridiculous. The other way you can always tell Canadian movies because they go bowling and it's candle pin. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I always, like, I made that point in an episode a few months ago and the two Bostonians around here were like, you guys don't have candle pin bowling? And I'm like, never heard of it.

[00:28:21] American bowling.

[00:28:22] No, I know it exists in this country.

[00:28:24] Up toward the border of Canada,

[00:28:27] you do get candle pin bowling. Decorated not eaten. Yeah, that's why there was only five though because they're so thick if you don't do to do anymore They're not gonna cook the oven's gonna be like it's too much overload. I can't do it It's gonna sink into the earth Thank you, Dan, by the way, well, I've been in my oven voice Listen, I don't I don't do the drugs. I'm not

[00:29:42] one of those boys

[00:30:41] from a micro dust gummy fine product. Which I also have not had at a point.

[00:30:45] Is that I hear the edibles do hit harder.

[00:30:47] Hit harder, yes.

[00:30:48] Like they hit hard, you could get out of hand in a hurry with the edibles.

[00:30:51] Yeah.

[00:30:52] So I think that was that part, but it was like.

[00:30:54] Yes, it was.

[00:30:55] To your point, they have a bite of the cookie and they're just lugity.

[00:30:58] All immediately.

[00:31:00] Which was great, but I did like my favorite part of that whole bit was her thinking that

[00:31:04] it was thick butter because it said THD on it.

[00:31:06] That's funny.

[00:31:07] That's funny. thing in this movie. And she's someone the family didn't even like. Right. Which at least they did like Ally. And that's something that only siblings can do to each other. Yes. Like the only reason that that flies at all is because they're siblings. Yeah. Like you couldn't do that to a friend. It was an excellent callback, an excellent stinger. Just don't think about it. Cause then you're just like, man, that guy, boy. Yeah. Uh, Dan. Uh, yeah. This first

[00:32:21] one it could be cause the movie is just kind of what becomes like a loving prank war I would have liked to see what happened if he continues down this rabbit hole a little bit further one of the things she does the hymn is is there's a

[00:33:41] Sign above the toilet that says please hold the the thing the flusher handle down for five seconds or the water will overflow

[00:34:45] there, not awoken, he's awakened. The first morning he is there by his whole family sitting on the couch cheering at a live hockey game on TV, which apparently airs in the morning

[00:34:53] in Canada. You know how those big hockey matches are on TV at eight in the morning. That's

[00:34:59] how Canadians roll.

[00:35:01] In America you mean?

[00:35:03] Yeah, in a, excuse me, in Minnesota.

[00:35:05] Maybe, maybe.

[00:35:06] It was the Olympics.

[00:35:07] Maybe on the West Coast. and keep it out in your garage fridge. But what do I know? At least it didn't have a seat back behind again. Hang on, I have to come to their defense here. Okay. I think that if you have a full house coming and it's Christmas and you're gonna be doing more baking and more than usual, you're gonna like go to Costco, really load up on those things. And yeah, you're gonna have some of it in your kitchen fridge that you're using immediately,

[00:36:20] but then your backup eggs and milk.

[00:36:22] Bring it in for seven days.

[00:36:25] I'm putting all the stuff we're gonna use

[00:36:26] over the next seven days in the main fridge.

[00:36:28] But what if your fridge. How dare you? I meal plan, I make food from scratch. Not true. That's not true. You caveman smoke the meat. That's right. That's exactly what I do.

[00:37:40] You get it.

[00:37:41] And brilliantly, I've seen it.

[00:37:42] Well, God bless you, sir.

[00:37:43] But also, yes, I'm not, you're right.

[00:37:45] If we had an outside fridge, which we don't, I would, I have no idea. But there's just this big thing, this big six foot tall column obelisk, whatever, covered in green cloth next to the staircase, and I need a peek. I need to know what's going on in there. What are they hiding? Yeah. Great question. This really reminded me that I need to go and do a CPR class or something again.

[00:39:01] It's been a long time My takeaway here is that CPR is like cool runnings. You feel the rhythm, you feel the rhyme, get on up with CPR time. That's right. That's exactly right. As long as I know to still do the compressions to stayin' alive, I think I'm good, right? I, I, I stayin' alive. Fingers through the other. That's right, yeah, but we got it.

[00:40:20] Keep goin'.

[00:40:20] There it is, we're good.

[00:40:21] All right, listen, I learned.

[00:40:22] We're all gonna save each other.

[00:40:23] Great.

[00:40:24] It's perfect.

[00:40:25] Dan?

[00:40:25] Okay, yeah, so they do a one year later

[00:40:28] and a two year later, The bakery thing is mobile. So like, if ever there was a time to make it happen, it'd be now. Another what the hallmark is. Couldn't get a bigger truck. Couldn't get a bigger truck. No one can stand in that truck. There's no room to stand in there and sell your things. You stand on the outside. It's like Barbie's dream cookie truck. Have your way. We did everybody, congratulations. Next week, we're heading over to Peacock for the movie,

[00:41:41] Genie, the movie Genie.

[00:41:43] Melissa McCarthy.

[00:41:44] Melissa McCarthy.