Ranking Every 2023 Hallmark Movie: Christmas Edition

[00:00:00] Hi, I'm Brandon. I love ranking episodes I like ranking episodes I'm Dan, and I also love ranking episodes, and this is the Deck The Hallmark Podcast Deck The Hallmark, it's his podcast And Friends Hosts, his podcast Follow us Hope you like this Dolly Podcast Follow us

[00:00:30] Well, hello everybody. Hopefully you're doing well Hopefully you've had time to digest all of the movies where Happy new year everybody Let's get that over to the president yesterday Whatever, why not? It's still new Our thing is still intact Still going strong, absolutely Still doing a thing

[00:00:48] Thing is still intact Coffee in the morning working great But hopefully everybody has done what the three of us have done And over the past week and a half spent time in prayer, meditation And a conversation with the Lord about our rankings

[00:01:03] Which is what we are going to be doing today We are going to take 44 total 44 counting the July movies 5 categories, so that's 9 per 9 per count 9 per That's right Piece of cake Piece of cake Let's head on over for those of you that are watching on Fyla

[00:01:21] Once again this is an episode that is best consumed on Fyla As most are because we're visually compelling If you're listening to your car could be a challenge That's right, it would be a tough one

[00:01:33] Fyla.TV.DTA should get started today and you can find this episode on there As you can see, we have 5 different categories Starting with real movie territory Big fun maybe 6 Standard feels right down the middle Because it's the third one Bad, baa baaa bad Dumpster fire, I'm sorry.

[00:01:58] I know. I know. I know. I know. I know. I'm sorry. Really the thing here is we are gonna collectively build this out which can bode to be a bit difficult. It can bode to be. It can bode to be. It can bode to be.

[00:02:14] A bode to be. A bit difficult because if you've, it's difficult. A bit difficult. If we keep talking it's gonna be ridiculous. If you've listened to this podcast. Stop having trouble after a boat. If you've listened to this podcast before,

[00:02:27] you know that I, by and large, love the movies. Stand by and large despises. That can cause a little bit of friction. When you're trying to figure out what movies are real movie territories. What's one of the dumpster fires? I think it falls in between.

[00:02:42] Some real bad movies are gonna end up in standard fields and in big fun maybe six. Or good ones. And then the real movie territory I think is gonna be a dog fight for those nine spots because you can't go more than nine spots.

[00:02:55] So I think that's gonna be where the challenge is. Well, without further ado let's get started. The Christmas and July movies and the Homer movies now movies are a part of this mix. Cause there are Christmas movies that came out in 2023. Sure it is.

[00:03:10] So we're starting in July with Royal Christmas Crush. Dumpster fire. It is a dumpster fire. Dumpster fire. I have a feeling we will all... That is not gonna move. It's not gonna move. I'm telling you it's gonna move up. So Royal Christmas Crush.

[00:03:25] You don't even wanna move that one. Here it comes and yay! And Shay on the mouse. On the mic. Mouse. That's right. Up next is Take Me Back for Christmas. Now, I have to be honest. I had intentions of going back and watching this movie.

[00:03:44] I did not get to it and I apologize because I had a hard time with my personal rankings during the holiday season because I remember loving the movie in July and thinking boy, this is a smash. Everyone else wasn't as high on it as I was

[00:04:00] but as I was kind of building out my rankings I kept finding movies that I was like, I feel like I like this one but I didn't really remember. So a little bit unfair for this movie cause I do feel like it was

[00:04:12] at least trying to do something pretty special. I would say for now, I think Standard Fields is a safe bet for it Dan. I can't tell you, like I don't think this movie's any good but it is 23rd or 4th on my list

[00:04:25] which would be in Standard Fields. It would be towards the back end of Standard Fields. So there are definitely 18 movies worse than this. So even though I don't like this movie it is not in that bottom two categories basically what we have to go with.

[00:04:39] So I'm fine with that. Piece of cake. Easy. All right. It's time to go back to October. Remember that? The marathon, having a good time. Checking it twice. We were raising money for kids in the spotlight. Having a real good time. And we watched a hockey movie.

[00:04:56] Check it twice. Yes. Brian Thoughts. You're the hockey guy. This is the movie that you were having a hard time containing yourself for. I was so excited for it. It has fallen. Oh no. I just feel like, I wanna rip the band in,

[00:05:14] put it in bad but bad bad, get it. Cause I feel like it's gonna end up there. I gotta be honest. I don't want it there. And I know that I'm using math here. But unfair. The math on my list would have this in standard feels. Whoa. Really?

[00:05:28] It's not in my bottom 18. It's close. It's in my bottom 18. But it's not in my bottom 18. It isn't. All right. So like for me, I would have this. Oh you know. If it's not in your bottom 18 you shouldn't have it in bad but bad.

[00:05:42] I have it in my bottom, boy, bottom five. Coincidentally, I have this right next to take me back for Christmas. They're right next to each other. Oh interesting. In the rain. Yeah, I would. So you're saying it's gonna end up in standard feels? Is that what you're saying?

[00:06:00] All right. If you're like, I don't remember personally I think this movie sucks but there were 18 movies I think suck more than this move. But I have it in my bottom five. I think that I thought this movie was hot trash. Lost your ever loving.

[00:06:14] But it was hot trash. Bottom five. Brian you're the one that was highest on the movie. It was and I'm fine with moving it down from standard feels but I, oh. Where did you have it? Where do you wanna put it?

[00:06:24] Where would you put it on your list? Where do you have it? Where do I have it? I have it. Holy cow. Where did it go? Oh here it is. 12. 24. Okay so it's standard feels. We both have it in standard feels.

[00:06:35] I was afraid it was gonna get shoved down there so I have to write. You and I have it right in the same spot. I want you to put it in front of take me back though don't you dare. I think it's better than taking me back.

[00:06:46] You are insane Dan. You can look, I'm not making that up right now. You can look it on my list. I see, I understand your list. Gotta be after take me back. Even Brian says it. Gotta be after that.

[00:06:58] And Brian about loses is my anytime he sees a hockey puck. Absolutely, having a tough time keeping it together. They're right there, that's fine. Yeah. This next one is bottom five. What do we got here? Oh yeah. Under the Christmas sky. It stops to your fire every day.

[00:07:12] Like come on, of course it is. Yeah. I'm checking it twice in your bottom five. This is my sixth least favorite of the year. This didn't make your bottom five. No this is six. You think checking it twice is worse than this movie? Yeah, enjoy it less.

[00:07:24] Oh my gosh. What? There's just no, when it comes to Christmas movies you just don't have any sort of like line. Yeah, no loss. No one. Such a gap. Such a Capricorn. It's unbelievable. Such a Capricorn. Lever rising, like a Phoenix in the night.

[00:07:39] Put it in dumpster fire please. Yeah, I think we're all agreeing. We're all agreeing. We're all agreeing on the mouse and you guys are making fun of me. You guys are giving me a hard time. Checking it twice lower than that movie.

[00:07:48] Yeah, the royal or after the royal though? Royal. I think the royal is worse than that movie. Spoiler alert for my least favorite movie of the year. It's not mine. Okay. That's not mine but it is worse than that one. That looks good.

[00:08:00] It's my second least favorite of the year. We're looking great so far. Yeah. I feel like we're building it out pretty good here. I think we're doing it too. We're building out pretty good. Where are you Christmas? The other movie we watched during the marathon,

[00:08:11] the movie that at the time was revolutionary, really impressive stuff for the Hallmark Channel. But in a season where they really upped it qualitatively, where did this movie kind of end up shaking out? The top two categories are the top 18

[00:08:29] and I did have this movie in my top 18. Can you stop bringing up math for one of us? I think, where are you Christmas is a big fun maybe six movie. That's where I think it belongs. I would agree with that Dan.

[00:08:42] Yeah, I don't think you could tell me that it's in the top nine. This movie is definitely not top nine. Okay, well there you have it. I have it standard feels but I'm okay with this. You have it standard feels. I have it lower than checking it twice.

[00:08:55] It didn't make your top 20, huh? You have it. No, no, no, I'm sorry. I don't have it lower than checking it twice. Where do I have it right here? 22. Okay. A little bit above. A little bit above. So I'm okay with this.

[00:09:06] Okay with this big four or maybe six for a week. Yeah, I think it's definitely a top revolutionary movie. Where are you Christmas is right around that 10, 11, 12 spot for me. It's not gonna the door of the top 11. I have 11. Yeah, yeah.

[00:09:17] Which if you had told me though at the beginning of the season. It would not make the top 10. I said in my hot take that evening it would not make my top five. I hope it doesn't but yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[00:09:27] I think that's a good spot for it. Miss Christmas comes to town. This is tough. This is a tough one. I, I, this is the 15th best movie on my list. Which means, You're higher than I did. Good Lord. Was it mean math boy? What does it mean?

[00:09:47] Big fun maybe six. I have a standard feels for this bad boy. I have a standard feels as well. Didn't make you either of your top 18. No, 19 just missed it for brand. 23 for me. 23, 23. It was a tough movie because it is good. There's some like elements of it.

[00:10:04] It was a lot of fun. I remember it. That's tough. Yeah, that's tough. It is tough. I think it's a right. Let's just throw it in the middle for now. Okay. And I think packed in a hurry. I know, but I think it's possible

[00:10:15] it could kind of find this way up. But we'll see what happens. Oh yes, Christmas by design dumpster fire. Yes, absolutely. We're all in agreement there. Bottom five movie and it just is. Is that your, is that your last of the year?

[00:10:31] No, no, it's the fourth last of the year for me. Wow. I have a lot higher than I remember, but I still dumpster fireworks great for me. So you think checking it twice is worse than that movie? No. No, no, no. Brian. What?

[00:10:45] You had checking it twice in your bottom five. No, it's my second least ever. Okay, okay, good, good, good, good. It's well Christmas crush than this. Yeah, that's where I land. But just throw it down there for now. We'll shake it out.

[00:10:56] I would have under the Christmas sky lower, but I don't care. They're both bad. Just leave it there for now. We'll figure it out later. We'll pray through it at the end. What? Yeah, what was going on there? It's weird. There's like a weird. Good spot there.

[00:11:09] Maybe it's just on that screen. I don't know. Does it look okay in your screen? Great. Love that. Up next we have Mystic Christmas. Oh yeah. I think I would, I think it bodes for me to say. A bode? Yeah.

[00:11:25] There's a handful of like surprises of the season. This movie kind of surprised me. Yeah. I remember it. It didn't has any right to be. It's charming. It's fun. Is it? Is it free Willy with pizza? Almost. Close, but I wouldn't quite say.

[00:11:41] It's a big fun maybe six. I think it's a big fun maybe six for now. Absolutely. I think that's what it is. I have it. Real movie territory. You have Mystic Christmas real movie territory. Oh my gosh. Really, really had a good time with that one.

[00:11:53] Who hurt you? Yeah. Top five? It's real fun. Yeah. Oh my. It's my fifth movie right now. Oh my gosh. But I mean. My problem and I understand what you're saying. My problem is, is I feel like all of my top 10 are movies that I,

[00:12:11] you know when we started this podcast six holiday seasons ago, I wouldn't, we wouldn't have seen these. Mystic Christmas is a really good classic home or Christmas. And so that's why I have a hard time putting it with real movie territory. Cause yeah, they're likable and it's fun,

[00:12:28] but it is, we've seen it before. It's just done really well. Just going one step further than saying there are three movies that I thought were like quirky, fast dialogue, witty banter movies round and round sealed with a list, Mystic Christmas.

[00:12:39] Mystic Christmas is by far the worst of those three movies. That's my problem is that of that, that little sub genre, Mystic Christmas. Right it's not as good as everything Christmas. And I think that's what you're trying to get at. Oh I don't hear those words at all.

[00:12:50] I mean that's what you're trying to get at. We'll get there though. That's what you're trying to get at. That's where I think, I'm thinking about seven movies for Wars Gonna Break. You're gonna lose that. I'm gonna fight though. I wanna hear the argument.

[00:13:04] I'm here for the discussion. All right. Joy X Noel. Joy X. This was a movie that for some reason, every time I was ranking movies after this movie aired I just kinda kept going like, I liked it more than that. I liked it more than that. Me too.

[00:13:23] Same thing. And there was nothing about this movie that was, it became my litmus test there in the middle. It wasn't an offensive movie. It just kinda like a was. And I was like, even the movies that were qualitatively worse than it,

[00:13:38] that I had more fun with them. I'm like, I liked it more. I liked it more. And so it suffered for that. I would put it in the bad, bad category. I don't have it in standard views. Just knowing that's where standard feels is gonna be incredibly full.

[00:13:50] But I will hand it over to you guys. It's no way it's bottoming. I have it, I have it down there. But that makes me, and I'm just saying, just knowing all the movies, I have it, that's what I'm saying.

[00:14:02] We've not put one in real movie territory yet. There's plenty of space out there. I understand. I'm just saying for me, that's where it suffered because it was like, it was- So it's in your bottom 18? It is. Okay. It is. And that's what I'm saying.

[00:14:16] Like I kept having movies that I was just like, I liked it more than that. I liked it more than that. I had a better time with it. And so I don't really know if that's fair to that

[00:14:22] movie, but that's kind of what happened over on my end. I have it just outside of my bottom. I mean like not just outside of, but I have it outside of my bottom 18. I would have it in standard feels. Where would you have it? Bad, but the bad.

[00:14:32] Okay. Then put it there. That's fun. Sorry, Joe X. Maybe next time. My Christmas guide. Ew. Ew. Buzz. Dude, that's a bad, but the bad bad. And like easily. Man, I haven't even lower than that. I don't know there. I think there's a handful of movies that are-

[00:14:51] Ooh. Clearly. Really low. Wow. You got a bottom four over there. I do. I have it bad, but the bad bad. Like it's like bottom 10, 12-ish to me. Yeah. It is a movie that I'm higher on than you guys, but I understand. So bad, but the bad bad.

[00:15:06] I'm not willing to fight any battles here, knowing that everything Christmas is coming up and I will throw all my chips onto the table. Flipping for Christmas. I have three higher than my Christmas guide. Chip off the old Glock. Yeah, chip off the old Glock.

[00:15:26] I would also have it in that bad, but the bad bad is where I would have it personally. But you know. Yeah. Unfortunate. Where do you have it down there? Even lower. It would end up in dumpster fire, but bad, but the bad bad. Yeah.

[00:15:42] I also have it in dumpster fire though. Unfortunately. Oh yeah. I have it in my bottom five. Yeah. Yeah. I got it. Put it down there. All right, it's a dumpster fire. Let's take a quick break. We'll come back. We're having a good time.

[00:15:55] We're having a good time. No big fights yet, but there's a few on the board that I think are gonna rile us up real goard. Here on Deck the Hallmark. Welcome back everybody. We're having a good time. We're ranking the Hallmark Christmas movies from 2023. You remember that year?

[00:16:20] Remember way back there in 2023? Do I? What a year. Man, what a year so far. What a year so far. What a year so far. And just think, we just talked about flippings for Christmas. Marcus Rosner, Asher Neubro. Get to see those two added again this weekend.

[00:16:35] This Saturday, correct. There you go. That new year golf movie. Lightning Strikes Thrice. The New Year Golf Movie in Bartholona. Yes, yes. Of course. Not in Bartholona and Budapest. Budapest. I'm not a person. Budapest. Never been crisp. Yeah, sure. A movie I think universally despised on the internet.

[00:16:59] It seems like even the Hines were annoyed at this movie. You're wasting the talent of Tyler Hines in a movie that had just kind of, it fell a little bit flat, weird. Thruffle not thruffle. Like either commit to the throttle or don't.

[00:17:18] They did a weird thing in the middle of that. So yeah, I still ended up liking it more than most people. So I, oh wow. I would have it in standard feels. I understand Dan is not going to end up there.

[00:17:36] Standard feels is where I have it in standard feels. I just don't understand like what movies you guys are watching in the bottom two categories where this is not somewhere in the bottom half of your list. I think it was funny.

[00:17:47] And even though it wasn't what we kind of were hoping would be, it was still quality movie. I don't think it was a quality movie. I thought it was a fine time. It doesn't play to any sort of like strengths of anyone.

[00:18:00] I think it's a bad movie guys. I'll say what everyone's thinking. I get to look at Tyler Hines for an hour and 24 minutes. That's the problem. Yeah. That is a problem. That is a problem. It was funny in the movie. Because I get a little lightheaded.

[00:18:16] My eyes start to twinkle. And I'm like, is that as everyone says it is? I don't know. Yeah. I mean if you guys both, I mean I have an imbib of a bad, bad almost dumpster fire.

[00:18:28] If you guys have it, if you guys have it in standard feels that's where we'll go with it because I'm going to get out voted two to one. But if this movie isn't in the bottom 20 then this crop of movies is just not as good

[00:18:41] as I thought it was. There's no way around. Standard feels it is. It's time for the Santa summit. I think we can all agree the first real movie territory of the season. A movie. I think for Crayolot we did it, what they did in the movie. We did.

[00:18:54] It inspired a generation of Santas from South Carolina to make the trip up to New York, go to one bar and call it a day. I see you in a big tree and call it a day. Yeah, 100%. A great movie. A great movie. I'd say so.

[00:19:09] Up next, mystery on Mistletoe Lane. A movie so good that Hallmark Channel said we want it too. And it not only premiered on movies and mysteries, it also premiered on Hallmark Channel. So congratulations to mystery on Mistletoe Lane. Vic Webster fighting chance. I liked it.

[00:19:31] I liked it quite fine. You didn't mind the dad just abandoning him. I did not mind it. You didn't realize. I did not mind it. You didn't even notice. He was really high on this movie when we reviewed it. I am. He didn't mind it.

[00:19:42] He raved about this movie. Did you bother him? I did not bother me. But I still have never been ever been Chris. So my opinion does not matter. I'll go to you guys. I think we have it on the record. I'll go to you guys. I listen.

[00:19:57] I know my list of makes sense. It makes no logic involved. It's all Christmas heart. It's all Christmas heart. That's the problem. I let my fingers do the talking. Where do you have it, Brian? I have a balloon.

[00:20:10] Bad but the bad bad thing is where it would be here. So I have this right on the cusp there of bad but the bad bad in standard feels. It's right next to take me back for Christmas and checking it twice.

[00:20:21] So for me, it would belong in that standard feels category ahead of never been Chris though. That's my problem. Is that's where it would go? Yeah. Okay. This is a win-win for me. I had to. Yeah, it's a win-win now.

[00:20:34] But that category, we're gonna have to kick something down. We're just gonna have to kick some rocks. That's right. All right. The next movie I think we can all agree is another real movie territory. It's Everything Christmas, a movie that just missed my top 10.

[00:20:51] I think it's gonna be a big fun, maybe a six movie. That's where I would put it but I'll... You just missed my top 10, Brian. This just did. I honestly thought it'd be way lower. So that's actually pretty good news for me.

[00:21:06] All right guys, ruin my life, ruin my vibe. 40 for me. So it's my bottom five movie. It's definitely a dumpster here. This is an absolute dumpster fire. Here's what I'm willing to do is I do have about six or seven movies ahead of this one as being worse.

[00:21:25] If you got it in your bottom five, it really should be in dumpster fire. I think Bad Bum-Bum-Bad-Bad only has two movies in it. We could throw a brand of bone and put it in Bad Bum-Bum-Bad-Bad. Wow, the Christmas spirit has not left you.

[00:21:37] You probably still have your tree up, don't you? People say that Christmas is over. I say it's only just begun. Yeah, here's the thing is, to me this movie had never been Chris to right beside each other in my ranking. So that's where I think never been Chris.

[00:21:57] Up next we're going to Christmas Island, a movie named after a song that they did not play. It was a song? You guys standing by your takes here? Christmas Island? Yeah, I am. What do I have? But whatever, I mean, oh yeah, top, I had 16 over there.

[00:22:17] I had 18. Look at us. I have it bottom six. Whoa! Bottom six this movie. The Andrew W. Walker? Yes, with Andrew W. Walker he can make a stinker too, just like everybody else can. So I would have it in dumpster fire. I cannot, gosh.

[00:22:33] A little crowded down there. Yeah, but also you're telling me you couldn't find 18 movies better than this one? Not at first glance. Not at first glance, no, unfortunately. I don't get that man. It was a fun time. You're gonna put this movie ahead of Take Me Back

[00:22:51] for Christmas and ahead of Miss Christmas comes to town and ahead of Mystery on Mistletoe Lane. And ahead of Never Been Chris. Keep naming movies, yeah. Brandon, you think this movie's better than Take Me Back for Christmas? No, I do not.

[00:23:05] You think it better than Miss Christmas comes to town? I have it one ahead. Really? Yeah. Why? I had a good time, Dan. Yeah, it was a good time. I had a good time and I know you're adverse to it. I know you have a hard time. Averse.

[00:23:18] Having a good time and also letting anything go that I say. But I had a good time. Susumi. But the thing is, is you have a good time in all of these movies. That's not true. That can't be the. That's not true.

[00:23:32] You would be the defining factor of why you rank it ahead of a movie. I had a good time. There's got to be better than that. No, there's like. There's had a good time A, had a good time B, had a good time C. I just, okay.

[00:23:48] It sounds like these two that's going to go in big fun maybe six. I'm okay putting in standard feels. I think he threw me a bone with everything Christmas. Ooh, why so far back, Aaron? Well, I think just throw it in there for now.

[00:24:02] We can kind of pray through. Sure, absolutely. I'm a high. I'll be a holiday. I have it relatively high. I don't remember the movie. I know there was the walk up the package. The package got ruined. Her name is Heidi Heidelberg in the Heidi Heidelberg. Those are the.

[00:24:23] Yes. No, I think this is a big fun. Maybe six. Maybe six. I do. I think it's a big fun. You got a way down. I got a little lower. Oh, sorry. I thought you were way down. Yeah, I don't know. I have 16.

[00:24:35] As much crap as I give your list. It's just the outliers where you're just like, I had a good time times 100, 10 out of 10 laser beams. That's right. What can I list? I think start to finish. I hate. Like start to finish. I hate his list.

[00:24:51] We have, I feel like our top 10 though is not that. Here's, here's I think. I just heard your bottom five. Here's what I think happens though, Dan, with my list is quality plus good time. Yeah, goes to the top.

[00:25:06] Good time over quality over quality over good time for you. Yeah, that's the problem. Yeah, but I like I'll at least like understand the consistency. I don't know what Brian's like. Mostly good time. I want to watch this. Well, you have your, your very scientific.

[00:25:24] Is this ranking based off of your scientific rating? Loosely, loosely, loosely. I look at my fun, the ranking that it ends up getting. I go, okay. So that's the general area where it's going to fall. And then I'll go to my list and start moving around.

[00:25:36] Yeah, I think not. I want to watch this more. This is better than that. We got to keep it moving guys. So yeah, we got to world record Christmas. Now, Dan, I think we've talked about how hard this movie is to rank.

[00:25:52] It is, it closes out my top 10, which even I was surprised by that. I didn't think it was going to break the top 10. I have it at 12. Okay. So that's a pretty clear big movie six category. Maybe six, not big movie six.

[00:26:04] This is the movie that I, yeah. Down to 26 for me. I had a lower than you boys. Rhyne's a monster. No. Yeah, got it. I don't know about that. So let's put in a big fun maybe six. Yeah, we had 12 too.

[00:26:19] I'm not going to argue with you guys. I remember having a good time with that movie. So I don't know why it's so low, but you know, you got to do you got to do here. All right. Navigate in Christmas. Oh yeah. 24 seven lighthouse for me. Christmas weird.

[00:26:37] Well, I have it as bad, but the bad, but could be talked into dumpster fire. No. This is not talking about easy. I, this was a fun time. The best kiss I've seen on movie to that Nora Jones song. Are you kidding me right now?

[00:26:52] It was just okay. She pulls them back in. Yeah. She pulls them in was great. The kiss itself, the lead. It was the best lead up to it. Yes. And that was your favorite. I have it at 30. So definitely bad. Bad bad. I just don't have a second.

[00:27:07] I barely didn't make my first fire over here. It's bad. But this is a Chelsea Hobbs joint brand. Nobody cares. I like I great for Chelsea Hobbs. It's just not a good movie. It's the first time brand see her. And I did like her. I did like her.

[00:27:22] I thought she had a good job. All right, Merry Scottish Christmas. This is the movie. I don't know where to put this movie because I love the scenery. I love the scenery of this movie. And I liked the leads of this movie,

[00:27:35] but the chemistry of the main couple. It's a sneaker top 20 for brand. Whoa. I made my top 20 and I, and I didn't see it coming. It's number 20 on my list. Wow. It's number 20. It's a standard feels boy. 28 for me. Yeah. Ryan's list should be not counted.

[00:27:52] Don't count it. I just, you know, there was something about it that was charming. Was charming. Yeah. And like as much as you want to like push back against it and just be like, we're doing this thing again. In the last three minutes, they're just doing everything. Yes.

[00:28:07] Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Like, oh, here's the key to this if you want it. And like, yeah, it was ridiculous, but I, it was nice. I would say this was a nice movie. Yeah. Standard feels. Standard feels. Okay. There it is. Holiday hotline. Yeah.

[00:28:26] Real movie territory, right? Real movie territory. It's gotta be real movie territory. We'll talk about where it shakes up, but it's got to be top nine for you. Yeah. Yeah. A season for family. It's another weird one, man. I like this one. I have that in the middle.

[00:28:38] I have it in the middle as well. This is 12 for me. Oh my gosh! This is up there. Actually, it's 17 for me. Yeah, it's up there. So that would be a big, brand of penny. Maybe six movie? Yeah man. This was a good one.

[00:28:51] Yeah, I'll let you guys live with yourself on that one. You guys can do every one to there. Yeah, I love that idea of having it higher than the movies in that other category. That's fine. That's fine. We'll see how long it lasts. I like that.

[00:29:02] What do we got? Maybe close. But look at, man, just look at the standard feels category and tell me you're surprised that I have those movies above a season for family. Knowing me, does any of that surprise you? I'm surprised that you have Miss Christmas comes to town

[00:29:20] and Scottish Christmas above it. I'm not surprised at the other ones at all. No. Yeah, yeah. This next one's real movie territory. Can't make me pause. Nina, why I'm in space. Just grab it. I just gotta keep going right up there.

[00:29:32] Letters to Santa is my least favorite movie of the year. It is a full on effing dumpster. I just wanna say this and I'm fine, I'm fine. I do wanna say this. Everything Christmas and letters to Santa double feature. I have. See you later. Christmas Eve.

[00:29:47] I think a lot of people, I think, assume that I have letters to Santa in like my top 20. I don't. I don't. 21. You really dug this movie. I do have it above a season for family. You watched it. And so just do with that what you will.

[00:30:02] You watched it. Do with that what you will. Mainlining cold medicine with a sick kid. It's bottom, bottom of the bottom. We did it. Great. But I have some other movies ahead of it. So like don't, it's 27. Okay. It's like, you know. So compared to your list, yes.

[00:30:21] I'll eat it up every day. But in reality, I just, you know, it was a good time for me in my situation. Holiday road. A lot of people love this movie. I have it in the high middle. So I have it like right around 16, 17, 18.

[00:30:41] I have a lower than that too. I have it 20. Then I'm fine with standard feels. I think maybe I have it too high. I would be willing to admit that. I think I have it too high. It is definitely. Don't put it at the end of that.

[00:30:52] Cause we're not doing this bit where it gets knocked down. I think, I think it's better than all those. Okay. We'll get there. Well, let's just get do it now. Let's just get where we need to go and get there. Notting Hill. I don't know.

[00:31:05] This is another one of those movies that I just kept being like, nope, nope, nope. I kept putting stuff in front of it. It is, I have it in the bad, bad, bad, bad category. I have it right next to the holiday road in my list.

[00:31:17] I haven't had 27 in my list. So 39, 35. So bad, bad, bad, bad, right? I think I'm fine with bad, bad, bad, bad. You're not gonna hurt my feelings. I love that. I love that. Real movie theater. Yeah, real movie theater. Get on up there. Yeah. Brand's got it lower.

[00:31:33] He's wrong. I know. I have it seven. Oh, okay. I have it seven. Great. But I will say this lower than I anticipated. Yeah. Lower than I anticipated. Can I say this right now? It's five or six for me. It may not make my top five.

[00:31:47] That movie, I thought for sure was gonna be a top three movie when we watched it. And the Johnsons of it all makes it to where it just... It's the Johnsons of it all mixed with how good some of these other movies are. Correct.

[00:31:59] And it's just tough for the amazing comedy of that movie to carry it over that. Those other good movies. Correct. Our Christmas mural. Our Christmas mural. Actually, I ended up liking this one more than I should have. I got it at 30. Ooh boy. That is low.

[00:32:16] That's bad, but the bad, bad for me. Pretty straightforward. I have it in my bottom five. Yeah. Where is it on? Sorry. Oh, I have it at 13 overall. 13? You should be shot on sight. I like it, man. I forget what I like so much about it, but...

[00:32:29] Where are you sleep at night? 13. Not well. I don't see that. What is a mural? And then they don't paint a mural on the wall outside. What I have found is by and large, my bottom five, Brian's high rock. I'm telling you, Brian's list sucks. No.

[00:32:44] It's a bog list. No, no. You're entitled to your opinions. They're weird. They're weird. I don't know. You should have Aaron doing this. Do you like mural, Aaron? It's middle of the pack. Yeah. Okay. Bad, bad, bad. So I'm on the board. Okay. All right. Built more.

[00:33:00] Real movie, real movie. Easy. Sure. Time for her. Dumpster fire. That's bottom five for me. Yeah. Same here. I'm not very similar on top and bottom. It's just the middle where mine, there's some quirky things I like more that. So what?

[00:33:14] You know, but bottom, we're pretty much in. I will say bottom five, top five, you and I are in lockstep. Lockstep. We go. I have time for her. Bad, bad, bad. So it's not like I'm that much higher on it. Yeah. Bit. What's this? Norwegian. Norwegian. Good.

[00:33:32] All right. I like Heidelberg more than Norwegian by a good bit of those two movies. Where is Norwegian on my list? Did I put it in here? You have 44 movies on there? I think I don't have it on my list anywhere. I missed one.

[00:33:45] I was going through it last night and I was like, what did I miss? And I figured it out. But yeah, I have it smack dare basically in the middle. But I, you know, I'm missing two movies on my list because I got 42. Okay.

[00:33:59] Well, I guess that might be one of them. Yep. I have this big phone, maybe six. You have it as big for no way. No way. Yeah, I sure do. Yeah, I'm not there, man. I'm just feels it's starting to pack out,

[00:34:11] pack it on out, but that's where I would have it. I would put it. Let's put it there for now. And you know what? Who knows what happens? That's nine, right? Who knows what happens? We're five, six, seven. That is nine. Okay. We're there.

[00:34:23] Hey, not so royal Christmas. Woof. I have it. Bad, bad, bad, bad could be talked into dumpster fire. I have it. Bad, bad, bad, bad. I have it. I have it. I have it. A lot higher than that. Yeah, there it is. What do you have? A 12 overall.

[00:34:38] Oh my gosh. So that's what big fun, maybe six. And this is where Aaron, Aaron's like, you're on your own now. I can't even try. So they were trying to help you out all episode. There were two paths and now they're both paths with everybody just going different.

[00:34:54] All right. So I guess it's going a little lower than I have it. That's right. Okay. What can you do? Christmas with a kiss. Boo, right? Yeah. I have it in dumpster fire. Yeah. I have it in bad, but the bad bad. Look at you. I know, right?

[00:35:11] That's just you. You heard Ronnie Rowe talking and you like, I mean, I haven't, you kind of start going. I haven't. As you're falling asleep to your Ronnie Rowe ASMR, you found you just kind of, whoa. I have it at 34, which is one spot out of dumpster fire.

[00:35:29] It's the worst of the bad. It's a dumpster fire. It is dumpster fire. Yes. Ooh, rescuing Christmas. It's real movie territory. I love this move. It's real movie territory. I love it. Where did it end up on your list, Dan? Eight. Okay. Six for me. Yeah.

[00:35:45] There you go. I loved it. I love this move. It's about to get tough. Ooh, yeah it is. Tall or good night. I have that in big fun, maybe six. I do. I think it's, Same here. I have that at 13 overall. 15. I think it's a really solid move.

[00:35:58] Just outside of big fun, but I get it. I get it. Let's go. Big fun, maybe six. 100%. Yeah. I'm not surprised to see to see two all a good night. Ending up. Yeah. Just drag it in. Hey guys, it's harder than you might think. There's a weird website.

[00:36:14] You got it. Yes. Magic and Missile Tome. Dumpster fire. I hate it. Really? This movie was terrible. I didn't have a voice. So I really didn't give it its due. I have this, let's see. Bottom seven. This is seventh last to last for me.

[00:36:28] I just thought the whole thing. I bought him 12. Yeah, I have it just in the bad, but a bad, bad category. Bad, but bad same here. I'm looking at what we've got left and I feel like there's two more movies that are gonna be down there. So,

[00:36:44] I think let's sort of bad, bad, bad. I think it could end up like leading the dumpster fire category, but for now I think it's a safe play. Whatever. Yeah. Cherry Lane, a big swing. Huge swing. I got it. I have it right, I have it ninth overall.

[00:37:02] Me too. Which is the last spot of real movie territory. It is, this is, see this is the perfect example of how if something is really going for it, I just, I give it more than it might be due. You know that I do that. Yeah.

[00:37:19] Because it's like, you know, there is a, you were on this episode, you were, you know. I was not on this episode. So like that, I didn't listen to your Facebook on it. Thanks so much for your double decker. Good support.

[00:37:30] There is a lot to like that middle family with Catherine Bell. If that family was even a little bit more likable, it moves it up even more. The mom and the kids are in a poker game to see who can be less empathetic. Yeah.

[00:37:43] And that's the tough thing, but that just shows you how big of a swing this is that there can be an entire storyline that I don't enjoy. And it still makes it a really good story. And they made it convoluted too.

[00:37:52] They did everything that could to mess that up in my opinion, but the performances of K-Hill, Brotherton, Gonzalez and Bennett are all great. And the swing is amazing. It's a great show. So yeah, I'd say back into real movie territory. Round and round another real movie. Yeah.

[00:38:07] An ice palace romance, Dumpster Fire. Dumpster Fire. It's a terrible film. I don't know what you guys said about it. I have no idea, but it's really bad. And then down here. Woof. Yeah. I have it in Dumpster Fire.

[00:38:20] I haven't had the feels, but at the top, bottom of it. So you have to say, I have at the top of my Dumpster Fire. Oh wow. Yeah. No, I think that this movie is, let's do Bad Bum Bum. Yeah, that's where I have it.

[00:38:34] Yeah, that makes sense. Secret Get Your Christmas Dumpster Fire. Oh yeah. No question about it. I guess so. All right. See now, seal with the face. I will plead the fifth on that movie. Where'd you have it? 26. Yeah. The head of Letters to Santa.

[00:38:50] So does that help anything? Does that make anybody feel better about what I've done? Yes, so a tiny, a strange. I mean you guys get it though, right? Like actually I had Secret Gift at 35, which is barely in the Dumpster Fire. So do I. 35, look at this. 35 overall.

[00:39:06] Bad Bum Bum Bad Bad. No, seal with the list has gotta be real movie territory, which means we're out there. That's right. We're out there. Family, friends, Christmas is really bad guys. I know. Something's moving up to. So you know what?

[00:39:21] And I'm looking at my list and I can't believe it, but I have friends and family in Bum Bum Bad Bad, which if you would've told me, I just didn't see it coming. But it's just so aside from the historic nature

[00:39:35] of the movie, which I do think matters, but we also need to just talk about the movie itself. 100%. And it's just a bit of a snoozer. What are the odds that we to just help alleviate some, can we put Holiday Road and Norwegian Holiday off the category?

[00:39:51] I think those two movies are both hands down better than the rest of that category. Up to a big fun, maybe six. Holiday Road and Norwegian Holiday are so much better than those six movies. I just think they are. They talk about a big swing, Holiday Road, man.

[00:40:06] That's a huge swing. I agree with Holiday Road, not with Norwegian, but twist my arm. Twist my arm. I think both of those go there and it gives us a little wiggle room here. That would mean friends and family goes in standard

[00:40:18] feels are bad, but the bad bad. What movie in bad, but the bad bad do you think is better than that? That you should move it up. Cause right now I'm fine with it going at the end of standard. Navigating Christmas, obviously. No.

[00:40:29] Can I talk anyone into everything Christmas? No. Can I talk any, but think about it! No. Think about it! No. Can I talk anybody into... The Mural Movie. I mean navigate. Shoot, no. Mural Movie. Let's move that on up a few more times.

[00:40:43] If I'm gonna move one of those up, it's sadly either Heaven Down Here or Christmas in Notting Hill or Joia Noel. Over the Royal? Not so Royal? Yeah! Really? I would move Joia up and keep friends and family down. I think Joia was a better movie, Brian.

[00:41:00] I'm fine with that. I need to go back and... Yeah. Yeah, it isn't a bad end. That hurts. It hurts. Now you've got standard feels. Give me standard feels, Dan. Give it to me. Fine, fine. Fine. Let's take a quick break. We'll come back. We'll nail this down.

[00:41:14] We'll nail this down, everybody here on Dive the Hallmark. I feel actually really good about these categories as they stand. I feel like we've done justice. I think those top nine are the top nine and there is a clear distinction between those top nine movies

[00:41:36] and the rest of the movies on this board. Oh yeah. No question about it. I do. I think that's the easiest top nine and I would question anyone that doesn't have that as their top nine. I think those are the best nine movies that Hallmark made.

[00:41:49] I think that's a locked great list at the top. The bottom, I think that 18 at the bottom are a Hodgepodge Beluga. You could put them in any order you wanted, but I like those 18. I think even a movie like Scottish Christmas, it's clearly better than those 18 movies

[00:42:03] down there at the bottom. Joia Noel, I think it's clearly better than those 18 movies at the bottom. Miracle Bethlehem PA, clearly better. Better because you guys liked it. Sure. I really liked it. I'll trade you everything Christmas for Bethlehem PA. Oh, dare you. Are you kidding me?

[00:42:20] You're gonna move it down to bad? Move it down to bad, but bad, bad? I'll allow it. That would make my day, buddy. Let's do it. I hate that. We've made a trade. We've made a trade. Hate this. Yeah. Yeah. Everybody wins there.

[00:42:32] I'm not coming back from Massachusetts. Piece of trash nativity movie down where it belongs. Oh, all right. Make it back. Switch it back. You see what I mean? You see what I mean? It is not worth it. I have my feelings. No, keep it where it is.

[00:42:44] Everything Christmas belongs there. Okay, do you want to go through the rank each category? Are we good? Are these locked? Are these categories locked? I think the categories are locked. I don't know what else I would try to change. All right, let's start with the last.

[00:43:00] Personally, I have Royal Christmas crushes to last, but I understand there's some different opinions there. All right, it's gotta be there. Yes, to the bottom. Absolutely. To the minds. That's right. You have a good idea to start a podcast. I think this will be fun.

[00:43:13] I think Royal Christmas is second to last. All right. You with me there, Brian? Yeah. Yeah? I think after that, I would probably go under the Christmas sky, Christmas by design or time for her. Time for her. Time for her? Yeah, let's get that out. Oh, come on!

[00:43:29] Christmas by design. Let's pop that down a few. You're saying you want time for her to be bottom three? And then can you put secret gift of Christmas at the top of that list? Please. And then I think that is my, let's lock it there.

[00:43:41] I think that's what I would have. Okay. Dan, I'll give you magic and mistletoe for the secret gifts movie. Swap it. Move secret gift up to Babababad? Yes, I'll do it. Yeah! Now we're locked. Imagine, yeah, but start, yes. Top of the dumpster fire. I love that.

[00:43:59] That's kind of unnecessary, but I love it. That's, I love it. I think it's unfair. It's not unfair. But there's not many movies yet, the bad movies that you had a fun time with. You're right. So that I think ups it a little bit.

[00:44:11] Listen, look on my list. Magic and mistletoe is lower than that. So. I'm gonna ask where everyone had Christmas with a kiss on their list. I had it higher than that. Really? What is Christmas with a kiss? Where is it? It's in the dumpster fire.

[00:44:26] I had it, I mean, I didn't have it much higher, but I had it at. Second to last. It's my last. I had it 10th lowest. Yeah. It's so high. Yeah. It's so high. Bottom two. I feel ladder to get that thing up there. Yeah.

[00:44:39] Where is Christmas with a kiss? It's dumpster fire by flipping for Christmas. Oh, oh, you liked it more. No, oh, oh, oh, I see. Opposite. Where's the letters to Santa? Yeah. I can't, I just can't abide by that. My girl. I'm telling you about.

[00:44:54] I love Santa's number two. Real bad. Alright, next. Take it back. I think my Christmas guide is too high on this list. Also. Yeah. Yeah, I think my Christmas guide is way too high. Yeah. I think. Don't you dare. Don't you dare. Move that way to the front.

[00:45:10] There you go. I think probably Notting Hill navigating and heaven down here should be near the top of that and Christmas guide and not so royal and Christmas mural. Can you stop doing what you want? Notting Hill's not leading bad, bad, bad. No matter how hard you try.

[00:45:30] Give us that mouse. It's nice. I kid, I kid, I kid. It was really low on my list. Yeah, okay. Alright, alright. I was trying to keep up with what Dan was saying but he was listening them to you. Bethlehem goes first in that category.

[00:45:42] Bethlehem has to go first. Yeah, and then navigating, right? Mural. Stop pushing navigating. Not mural, not mural. I think you can make a case for navigating being next to that. And then notting Hill. And then I think heaven down here. I'm fine with that.

[00:45:58] And then family and friends. Family and friends probably needs to be up there. Guide. Yeah, I think family and friends the head of heaven down here, right? You don't think so? Yeah. Guide, mural, not, I like that. I like what we have there. Alright, I'll take that.

[00:46:12] I'll take that. Lock it! Lock it! Everything here is joint. Everything Christmas is at the end of that. That is locked. That's a switch we made. Everything Christmas is at the bottom. Cannot go any higher. I would move checking it twice down further

[00:46:27] but then aside from that, I like this list. I think of those movies, Miss Christmas Comes to Town should be at the top of the list there. I'll allow that. You got Barbara Niven, Bryn and Elliot giving great performances. And then moves Scottish up some too I think.

[00:46:42] Yeah, I think Scottish could be up right next to it in all honesty. I do too. I do too. Move it above. Okay, that's fine. Then time for me. Yeah. Take me back you mean? Yeah. I mean I would probably have Joia Noel

[00:46:56] up there past checking it twice and take me back but I'm fine with it as it is. The rest of those movies I hated. I wanna move checking it twice down more. I was kind of thinking that the big question. I would never been Chris.

[00:47:08] Hey, I'll move everything Christmas up one spot, Bryn if you put never been Chris last in that list. Steel. Oh. Yeah. Oh well. This is happening. I wanna get up to make one maybe six. I'll move it up ahead of Christmas Island. You will. Yeah, let's go.

[00:47:27] No, like Joia Noel's still ahead of it but Chris, yeah there you go right there. Yeah. I'll allow that. I like that. Let's go. Yeah, I like that. This is a good list. This is a good list. I like seeing hockey represented the top of that

[00:47:39] the first half of that. I like that. I like it. And then I actually think Big Fun maybe six is right. Is, I would, we're Wicker Christmas, I'd go up one. I would go season for family down to the bottom of that list. Oh.

[00:47:52] That's what I would do. Oh boy. I would actually go to go all a good night up one as well ahead of Heidelberg. Yeah, Heidelberg I don't feel like it belongs. Well, I guess. I like it there. That's what I like. I like that, Bryn.

[00:48:03] I think that's good. All right. Top is going to get interesting. Bryn, what's your one? I want to still built more. What's your one? Round and round. Round and round is my one. Lock it round and round. Has to be done. Can't believe it.

[00:48:15] And then two is built more. Can't believe built more is not one. I can't believe it, but brand. I thought a lot about this. I did. I'm just trying to rip it off like a bandaid because built more Christmas was everything

[00:48:24] I wanted it to be aside from the ending. And that's why it's not one round around stuck the landing built more Christmas did not. I have seen a summit three. That's what I have three. I do too, but I have hauled the Holly ahead of it.

[00:48:38] Bryn, so tough. I have holiday hot line above Santa summit, but I'm fine with it. I like Santa summit there and I'll give you a holiday hotline at four. Catch me a few claws. We got to do a hauling before claws, right?

[00:48:53] You have claws before the Holly before claws, but also have sealed with a list before haul the Holly. Wow. Wow. And before claws. I'm irrational. I don't know the Holly like you are. You are just blindly have it so high. Brian, would you like to know that

[00:49:08] haul the Holly is not in my real movie? No, I don't want to know anything about that. Thanks, Aaron. Seal with a list before you have it. I have sealed with a list above Cherry Lane, but after rescuing Christmas, I have sealed the list above all those movies

[00:49:21] until holiday hotline. Where do you have it? Eight. Eight? Yeah, but I feel like that's probably, this is so hard. That's fine. If you both have it eight, keep it at eight. Keep it ahead of Cherry Lane right there. I think that's right. I think we did it.

[00:49:36] No, that's the right right there. Wait a minute. Wait a minute. No, you've got to put haul the Holly ahead of catch me if you claws. Yeah, I think so. For what reason? Unless you want to bargain me with some seal with a list.

[00:49:47] You have hauled the Holly in front of it? Yes. All right, you guys. I do. I got it sixth, but seal with a list I got up here. Okay. That's fine. That's fine. I think this is a solid list. That's a really good list.

[00:49:59] We did what we had to. We made some compromises. Yep. Can we move sealed up one? Just one? I think it's fine. You're not allowed to talk to me about that. If you want to move sealed up, I think it's better than both of those movies. All right.

[00:50:10] For me, the reason why I loved Resking so much is a lot to do with the end. Like when she turns around and everything's back and it just delights turn on and it's magical. Like it just hit. It goes wrong with everything. I get it. All right.

[00:50:21] Did it. Are you ready? Yes. Starting with the last working its way up to one. Letter to Santa, Royal Christmas Crush. The Star Movie. Time for her to come over for Christmas. Christmas by design. An ice palace romance. Christmas with a kiss. Flipping for Christmas and rounding out

[00:50:39] Dumpster Fire's magic in mistletoe. Up to bad. The Secret Gift Movie. An also Royal Christmas. Christmas mural. My Christmas guide. Heaven down here. Thank you, Dan. Friends and family Christmas. Christmas and Notting Hill. Navigating Christmas. Miracle in Bethlehem PA. And Standard Fields Never Been Christ. Christmas Island.

[00:50:59] Everything Christmas. Fly on Noel. Mystery and Mistletoe Lane. Checking it twice. Take me back for Christmas. Merry Scottish Christmas. Miss Christmas comes to town. In Big Fun, maybe six. We have off. Let's see. Season for Family. Norwegian Holiday. Holiday Road. Heidelberg Holiday. To All a Good Night.

[00:51:20] A World Record Christmas. Mystic Christmas. Where Are You Christmas? And the top nine movies of the year. Christmas on Cherry Lane. Rescuing Christmas. Seal with a List. Catch Me If You Cause. Hall of the Holly lit up. Holiday Hotline. Santa Summit. A Built More Christmas.

[00:51:36] And the number one movie, Round and Round. We did it. Do you want it on the record? I like to build more a little more, but I just wanted it on the record. Thank you, Chris. Yes, of course. All right, we did it everybody. Congratulations.

[00:51:49] I think that officially puts an end to the holiday season. Congratulations. We did it six seasons and a movie. We'll be back tomorrow with another one until then maybe the first to wish you a Merry Christmas. Deck the Hallmark is a Brable Jam podcast

[00:52:03] is produced by Aaron Shea. For more information on Deck the Hallmark, you can go to deckthehallmark.com. For more information on the Deck the Hallmark family, you can go to brablejamplus.com. Deck the Hallmark is presented by Philo TV for a free trial of Philo.

[00:52:16] Go to Philo.tv slash DTH. You're about to hear some ads that help keep the lights on here in the old studio. Thanks for listening or don't listen. It's really up to you at this point. Is that the end of the show? I mean, you're listening to me.

[00:52:37] Hi. But here they come. I promise they're coming. Yep, here they are. Happy day.