Royal-ish (Hallmark Channel - 2025)

[00:00:01] Hi, I'm Brian and I love Hallmark Royal Movies. I'm Brian, I like Hallmark Royal Movies. I'm Dan and I despise Hallmark Royal Movies and this is the Deck The Hallmark Podcast. Deck The Hallmark, it's this podcast. Friends host this podcast. We hope you like this jolly podcast. Hello everybody. How are we? Great. Oh man. Great. I don't want to put you on the spot.

[00:00:38] Brian, your early favorite from Arch Menace. Brackets are out. Brackets are out. You looked at the pairings and you went... It's Gorgonzola. Gorgonzola. That's a cheese. That is not a college. That's a cheese. You got Gorgonzola v. Munster in the finals? Is that what you got? That is a tougher matchup than I expected on you. Oh boy. I mean, Pepper Jack in the final already. Pepper Jack in the finals of cheese?

[00:01:07] Cheese? Get out of here. Pepper Jack cheese? Pepper Jack cheese is a great cheese to add to a burger, but an all-time cheese on its own? No. I do it on eggs. I do it on almost any sandwich. But if you're just eating a bite of cheese, Pepper Jack is not it. Yeah. I'll eat a bite of Pepper Jack. Are you kidding me right now? Pepper Jack is just like a basic... It's a basic B of cheese. No, it's not. Well, I don't think it's a basic. It's a basic B. I don't think it's basic. You don't know anything about college basketball. Dude. That's offensive. That's true. Holy cow.

[00:01:33] You've shown your cards a little bit too early, Dan. Whatever, guys. Dan, who do you got early in the cheese tournament? I mean, I think Munster's a quality cheese. It is a quality cheese. I think Gorgonzola's a quality cheese. At least we can agree on something. Yeah. Yeah. Listen, you guys can disagree on Pepper Jack and still agree on the... I love Pepper Jack cheese. I want to be very clear. Brent, who you got in the wheel? You don't want to talk about basic B.

[00:02:00] Oh, American. No, listen. I think Cheddar has gotten a bad rap lately. They were accused of some stuff. Nothing has been proven. And I see them making a run, personally. Brent, making a wheel. Backs against the wall. Making the runs. Backs against the wall. Who better than Cheddar? Who better than Cheddar to prove that they still got it? People think the days of old, Cheddar going to the finals every year is not going to happen anymore. I think it could happen this year. Hey, Real Talk, I know we've been having fun here. If you've been to Publix,

[00:02:29] or if you've not been to Publix and had the smoked Chipotle Gouda cheese, you'll never eat Pepper Jack again. Wow. If you normally go there and you get a Pepper Jack on your sandwich, you get the smoked Chipotle Gouda. It's spicier. It's more flavorful. It's got a little smoke in it. It's amazing. Can I ask you, you went to Publix for the... You got a sandwich there? Recently? Yeah. So when you were there, scale of one to ten, pleasure. Why? Pleasure. It's a pleasure.

[00:02:59] It's like, so ten? Yes. Ten out of ten, pleasure. Ten out of ten, pleasure. That's a lot of pleasure. Because it's where shopping is a pleasure. Yeah. That's their whole thing. And so you're saying they... They crushed it. They crushed it. They are who we thought they were? We let them off the hook. We're talking royal-ish today. Obviously. The third... Come on, we're leaving away. The third and final royal movie for royal month. And then we get into a weird... I don't know what the movies are. No, I mean, I know what they are. They're the... At least we don't preview them by season. You know what I mean?

[00:03:29] Months only. They're the feast and fable. What are they called? Hearts around the table. Hearts around the table. Hearts around the table. That's exactly right. Hearts around the table. We should have thought of that. Quad? It's a quad, right? Aaron? It's like Love Club. So four of them? You know what I heard about the... At least a try. You know what I heard about the Love Club? Aaron, maybe you know the... If this is true or not. Is a Love Club follow-up airing on Up? I know there is a Love Club follow-up. I didn't know it was airing on Up.

[00:03:58] Love Club. Love Club. So we don't have to do it? Yeah, man. That's really good. I don't know. I'm in a tough spot there. We already did all the Love Clubs. This is a follow-up. I kind of feel like we have to. What? Why do you feel like we have to? Yeah. That's one of the dumbest things you've ever said. I don't think so. Oh, God. You know for a fact that's not true. Up Faith and Family Streaming Services acquired the Love Club Moms. Wait a second. Love Club Moms? Now we're talking. Featuring... I don't know what you think it is.

[00:04:28] But you need to sit the next few plays out. Focused on different mothers but featuring the same Love Club characters. Okay. They're all already available on Up and Faith and Family. So the original club... The Love Club Moms, Colin Torrey. Love Club Moms, Colin Joe. Love Club Moms, Colin Harper. So is it like Brent Bristow's mom? Colin, I would assume that the kids... Like the moms are still the... Can we do a little preview here baked in? Can we listen up? Can you find one on the IMB? I got it.

[00:04:58] I got a preview for the Love Club Moms Harper and for the Love Club's mom Nila or Nyla. N-I-L-A. Okay. You want me to read them? Just give it to me. Harper, a pillar of the community and a mother of two, struggles when her husband asks for a separation, leaving her to seek help from her friends in the Love Club. She gets involved in community initiatives with Colin, a divorced dad. But when he takes credit for the initiative, she throws her hat into the election ring with

[00:05:27] the Love Club as her campaign team, ultimately trying to help her blossom. So to be clear, this is the original Love Club... Helping new Love Club Moms that you are sexually excited about. So... You want to hear Love Club? I like the idea of it. Are we going for Nila or Nyla here? What do you think? Let's go with Nyla. Yeah.

[00:05:52] Nyla, since her husband died three years earlier, rest in peace, obviously, has focused on her Instagram business and helicopter parenting. I can't talk about it. Her daughter Mara. Mara. Mara. Mara, now a tween, creates a dating profile for her mom to break free, leading to a series of dates with Nyla, ending with a pretend relationship with local coffee shop. Top owner, Ollie. I don't need that tween drama. And I've got a very small...

[00:06:22] Which one are you going there? I'm going two. Two? Yeah, two on that one. Two Love Clubs. Two Love Clubs. I'm going five for the first one. So far, it's all zeros for me. There is a very quick one for Love Club Moms. Joe. Joe's old high school flame just walked into her office, and he's got a little troublemaker in tow. Oh. That's what it says. He's got a little troublemaker in tow. He brought his little troublemaker. His little stinker. We can't leave him. Wow. Do we think that the little troublemaker is a kid?

[00:06:52] Yeah. I would hope so. I don't know. Could be a dog. Could be a gremlin. It could be a dog. Could be a gremlin. I'll say this. There's no way in the world we need to do those movies. Let us know. Drop your comment. Yeah, drop a comment. Yeah. I don't know. Let us know. I think we did more than we need to there. Let us know if you think we should watch them. But so I'm just confused, though. So it's the original club, but they're barely a part of it. I think they just pop in occasionally. Yeah. Bring us a new people in. Let's talk royal-ish. Royal-ish.

[00:07:21] It's like Saved by the Bell of New Class. Like Zach appeared in that one episode, and everybody went nuts. Yeah. Yeah. Royal-ish originally premiered on the Hallmark Channel on the Ides of March. Very nice. Great. On the Hallmark Channel, that's the 15th, right? Is that Ides? Thank you. That's Latin for 15, yes. Yeah. Latin? Ides. Yeah. Nice. Or is it Peruvian? Pepper Jack's really big over there. I've heard that. Yeah. That's why I do so well. Went a little something like this.

[00:07:50] Prince Henry is a simple man. He just likes to fence out in the yard and care for his daughter, Princess Rose, who's going through a bit of a tough time. So he decides to take her to an American theme park, Once Upon a Timeland. You know the one. You know the place. We meet Lacey, who plays Princess Sweet Pea at Once Upon a Timeland.

[00:08:19] When Princess Rose meets her, she's immediately a big fan, and they end up spending some time together, and Princess Sweet Pea and Henry end up waltzing. So that's fun. But obviously, at the time, she doesn't know that they are real-life royalty. She thinks that they're just another dad and daughter at the Once Upon a Timeland thing.

[00:08:47] But the next day, she's pulled aside at work and has told the truth about who they are, and they want Prince Sweet Pea to show them around the park personally. Can't hide money. She does this, and they end up talking more, and it turns out that Rose is deathly afraid of horses. But with Lacey's help, she is able to conquer that fear and get on the merry-go-round to ride fake horses

[00:09:15] one step closer to real horses. Impressed by this, Henry asks if she would be willing to come with them back to his home and help Rose ride a real horse. Apparently, it's a big tradition for the Order of the Lily ceremony. Is it possible that if she's afraid of the horse that she could just ride in a vehicle? Yes, it is an option, but one that is a last resort.

[00:09:47] So on her way, she goes, and she's just constantly catching strays from Henry's mom and this one dude who really hates her. But none of it matters because she's really helping Rose with the horse fear and is getting to spend more and more time with Henry, and the sparks are flying. He ends up showing her his secret spot all above board, and they end up kissing.

[00:10:16] The Order of the Lily is here. The Order of the Lily? That's what I call it, is my little troublemaker. The Order of the Lily is here, and Rose is real nervous. So Lacey rides alongside of her, and it is a big success. But the guy who hates her, I don't really know what his role is, but he seems serious. Jeeves, ask him.

[00:10:46] Is real mad about this, and he's like, if you think that you're going to end up with Henry and you're going to get him to fall in love with you, you are out of your mind. You, not a real princess. You just play one at a theme park. But uh-oh, things go from bad to worse. When she loses her theme park job after a photo leaked of her in her Princess P costume talking to Henry. And that's a no-no. Why is this a fireball offense?

[00:11:16] Who can say? But it is, and it has happened to her. So she decides that it is best if she just leaves before the ball. Uh, before her heart is broken. When she goes to return her costume to her old job, her boss is like, hey, one more gig. I got you one more gig. Get out there. Turns out it's a trap, but a good one. Uh, because out comes Henry and Rose. And he's like, I love you. Please come back.

[00:11:46] And uh, you know, maybe even relationship. Maybe even you can help kids. Equine therapy. Equine therapy. Um, and so she does that. Cut to six months later, he proposes. And she says yes. And they kiss. And now my friends love. Royal ish. Give me that royal ish, y'all. Goodish. Uh, let's take a quick break. We'll come back and we'll get to the wait what and the what the hallmark. Here on. Take the hallmark.

[00:12:16] I was shocked. Truly shocked in that entire synopsis for the, as many times as I said horse. Rig was nowhere to be found. You need a lot of horses, I felt like. Yeah. A lot of horses. Okay. And the problem is, is there's. Horses. Nothing. Yeah. Nothing you can do there. Rig isn't even on the line. I said she's afraid of horses. He might be on sabbatical. We don't know. He could be on sabbatical.

[00:12:45] I think he said horse fear. He always does go on some sort of spring break. He does. You're right. We'll get an update on that soon. It's time to break down Royal ish. We're going to start with the hot tag is where we share our thoughts on this movie. And I will start with you, Brian. Brian Royal ish, a big win. Or is it just ish? Unfortunately. Well, I'm really, I want to say I'm really happy for Nicole Sikora. First of all, really, really happy. We're happy. This is not a great start. Let's get that. I'm so happy.

[00:13:15] I was kind of bored by this, unfortunately. And it felt like such a downer. Like I was bummed because the first two Royal movies, like the idea of this Royal thing going on this month was like, okay, we'll see. And it was a lot of fun. The first two movies, I thought they were better than expected. And then this one just kind of like, I don't know, trickled out of the barn, if you will. It trickled out of the barn. I will. Thank you. I will. I don't think Dan will, but I will. I don't need him on that one. Hard pass.

[00:13:45] Being Royal, like being royalty and going to an American amusement park is bonkers and nuts. And then the more I thought about it, I'm like, ah, it's still kind of sweet. Like that's a good dad move. But I still couldn't get out of the back of my mind how crazy that was. They just, we didn't get any info on why he even chose that park. Nothing. It was just a ran, like there were so many times where I'm like, why'd they do that? Why'd they do that? And they just skipped past it all. It felt like there was not a lot of dialogue.

[00:14:14] Like there was not a lot of talking, like good, substantial talking. It was all very like surface level conversation. One real, this is almost a feel, borderline feels. Borderline feels in the hot take segment. But I feel like it belongs up here, up front. I can't wait to see what your actual feels are. Knowing how to waltz and like unsuspectedly getting called up there to waltz and be able to do it, baller move. It's a baller move. Baller move. I wish I could do that. Yeah, if you have that in your back pocket.

[00:14:43] It's like having that one song on the piano. Oh, yeah. It's like, oh, I guess I could. Yeah. There's a free, I guess I could play. You guys need me to play. That'd be so great. That should be your thing that you do next year, by the way. We need someone to waltz. Yeah. Don't make me waltz. Don't make me waltz. So, yeah, I was just kind of bored by this and bummed that it ended on kind of a down note.

[00:15:03] This movie is one of, one of, potentially takes the crown, if you will, for the dumbest plot I've ever seen in the history of doing this here program. Um, I, I just want to lay out the stakes, uh, if you will. I will. Um, so. The gentleman will.

[00:15:30] Prince Henry takes his daughter who is feeling a bit overwhelmed by the idea of the crown and the idea of having to ride a horse. He takes her and says, let's get your mind off this. Let's go to theme park that is completely themed around the royalty. That's right. Uh, so we'll get your mind off the crown by surrounding you by fake princesses. Yeah.

[00:15:53] And then the rest of the movie is essentially helping her overcome her fear of horses. And that's it. And, um, the reason why she got fired, ridiculous, um, her, him coming back. Oh, like they act as if this flight, this 10 hour flight, which they say is a 10 hour flight

[00:16:21] is no, like, it's just easy. And, uh, I can do it anytime I need to. This movie is ridiculous, uh, and bonkers. And, uh, for the most part, not in a good way. Um, I still had fun with this movie and I don't know if I had the type of fun that was intended. I know that. Uh, with the movie, uh, but, uh, it is trouble. It is. I'm a little troublemaker. I'm a little stinker.

[00:16:50] If you will, this movie is bonkers in the words of my good friend, Dan, uh, very silly, very ridiculous. And I don't know if that was the goal. And so that's tough. Uh, Dan, it's just buh, buh, buh, buh bad is what it is. Uh, Brian was kind. So kind there. Um, we do a bit around here about the stakes. Couldn't be lower regularly. We have a movie about the botanic cup that we did where there's literally just trying to arrange flowers.

[00:17:20] The plot of this movie isn't for nine year old needs to ride horse. And if she can't, then she has to ride in carriage. Yeah. Worst case. She's still right. And if she rides in carriage, there's one less seat in carriage and somebody is going to have to ride elsewhere. That's it. That's it. This is a movie about planning carpool. That's what this movie is about. Uh, and I will say this. I wasn't a huge fan of the Royal.

[00:17:47] We, I thought the reluctant Royal was solid in a lot of ways, but I would say the first two of the three Royal movies in Royal month, I would consider a success for Hallmark. What is this? Um, these two leads guys, why'd we save them for last? Why would like Nicole? So curl was excellent in the finish line. I don't know what's going on here.

[00:18:12] There are some scenes where there's no music playing and it is like high school theater vibes. When a scene's not going well, the, the scenes with her and, uh, the dude from the Chronicles of Narnia don't, don't get a lot of chemistry here at all. Um, it's not great. They're not great together. Uh, the, the plot of this movie is nonsensical.

[00:18:37] I just, we have seen time traveling carousels with much more on their minds than, than what is going on in this movie. Um, this was brutal. This was brutal. It was real tough. And it wasn't where I would agree with Brian and not Brandon is, is I didn't enjoy it even in the way you shouldn't enjoy it. It was boring. So if you have a movie where nine year old needs to ride horse or carriage and you have to decide, and that's the movie, we'll make it silly, stupid fun. And you can maybe win a few points with me.

[00:19:06] They did not do that. They play this thing straight forward. Like it's a real deal movie. And I hated it. It was so bad. I'm sorry. All involved. It was, this was not a way to end Royal month. We had a lot of goodwill built up and then this happened. I had a great time for Royal month. Uh, so it's a pleasantly surprised by Royal month. Yeah. Uh, let's get to all the feels Brian. You, uh, kind of already did one. You stopped on in there. I can't wait to see what you got. Here's the full blown one. Yeah.

[00:19:34] What you got real feels here where the Prince had the conversation with his mom about his role. And I came across pretty authentic to me where he was talking about, I want to have some autonomy here. I want to have a say in what my daughter's doing. I kind of liked that scene. Um, I don't think everybody else felt that, but it worked for me. What? It worked for me. I thought that was really well played and well done. So shut up. Um, well, I'll just say this.

[00:20:02] We've seen a lot of bad, um, costumes over the years and, um, they put a lot of medals on bad guy and the medals looked legit. So shout out to the costume department for, uh, the medals. And also to your point, Brian, about waltzing. Um, yeah, I didn't know is, uh, you know, a, a, a surprise secret. Good Walter is now a secret. Good Walter. Yeah. Uh, is that our goal of mine? I didn't, but what if you, you learn the skill and then you never are in that position

[00:20:31] and then you just spent your whole life. Like you learned, you're still, you know what? And you didn't get to tell anybody you're a secret. Good Walter. It's never a bad thing to learn a new thing. You're an unused secret good Walter. That's fine. You've still learned it. It is never, it is never. So it's about your personal, just being better. Personal growth. Yeah. Exactly right. Never stop learning. Never stop learning new things. Whether you use it or not, it doesn't matter. At least you did it. You can also put it in your will that I was a secret great Walter and you guys never even asked. That's right. That's right.

[00:21:00] And so after you go, people feel really bad. They feel like we should have asked him to walk. Shame on you. Absolutely. Now I feel like maybe you guys are, do you guys want to waltz? Well, since you asked, we have room in here. Do it. The moral of the story is always ask people if they can waltz. Because they might be surprised. Or tell them to waltz even if you don't know. That's right. Get out there. Always be waltzing. Dan? Yeah. It's done. You want waltz too? It's done. I don't want to comment on that. It's done.

[00:21:30] The real month's done. And those are my feels. Okay. Let's take a quick break. We'll come back. We'll get to the weight one, the what the home. All right. Kieran. On deck the hallmark. What did that still have to say? They brought his little what? Troublemaker? Little troublemaker. He brought his little trouble. I think we need to at least watch that one. Nope. We don't.

[00:22:00] Don't mind me. I brought my little troublemaker. The second Love Club quadrilogy premiered direct to streaming on Up Faith and Family. Heck yeah, bro. I don't know what else I need to say. I think that's a complete sentence. A little troublemaker. That's right. Let's get to the weight one. It's where we talk about what in the series is going. What? I'll start with you, Brian. Yeah. You mentioned the fencing early on because they start with that. They're fencing with no masks on. I don't know if that felt...

[00:22:30] You can't do that. That's against the law. It felt like it should be against the law. Can't do it. Gone. Nose? Gone. Cheek? Yeah, cheek could be gone. Cheek could be gone. Either one. I think we got him off. So you could lose a lot. Forehead? Yeah. No, I don't know. With one strike of the... Haircut, maybe. I'm going to be on fence as well. I'm going to be very... On cheek as well. Cheek would be a tough one.

[00:22:59] He'd have to kind of be like... Nose, eyes, ears. Yeah, for sure. Those are full. Those are a fair game. First. First, second, third. So Princess P at her apartment, her roommate made them lasagna and delivered it to the couch. And they ate lasagna on the couch. And it was the most perfectly plated lasagna I've ever seen. We talked about this. You did? While watching it live. You don't want a lasagna that perfect. I said it wasn't lasagna. It looked like there was no cheese in it.

[00:23:29] It's going to be chewy. It's not like... What you want is you want to plate it and then it all kind of just fall all over the place. That's exactly right. You have to scoop a few times to get it all on. You want it to be unrecognized. Closer to baklava. You want to look like you were fencing without a mask. That's exactly right. That's what you wanted your lasagna to look like. That's exactly right. It's a great point. Thank you. So Sweet Pea was hardly fazed when she found out they were royalty at the amusement park. Just didn't even... To top it off, she didn't even wish the princess a happy birthday when she found out it was her birthday.

[00:23:59] She didn't even say happy birthday or do any of that. So I was just kind of like, what's her deal? Is she not... Like, is she not impressed? Is she not into this? Is she not believe it? There's not near, in my opinion, the emotion from any character in this movie that there should be. Yeah. Like any of them. There's a little muted all around there. Yeah. Yeah. And the last one was the disguise at the farmer's market where he's like, I'll just... It's cool. Khaki ball cap. Yeah. I won't be a problem. Classic khaki ball cap.

[00:24:28] Maybe they'll think I'm Ron Howard. I don't know. Maybe. Is he scouting a movie site? Yeah. Maybe. Could be. Just a bold move. And no connection to... I don't know if you'll mention anybody I'll mention. No connection to the other movies, right? At the very end... It's loosely... The horse that they bring in is Triscuit's... Okay. That was it. That's it. It's disappointing. Yeah. Triscuit's... Very disappointing. A little troublemaker. Yeah. That horse is a little troublemaker. A little troublemaker. I'll just say this. Did you say horse? Oh, really? Oh, hello there.

[00:24:57] How are you, brother? I'm doing all right. How about you guys? Did you hear us talking? I did. You talk about Triscuit the horse? Yeah. Where are you right now? I'm in Turks and Caicos. Really? Yeah. What are you doing there? I'm siding with the Caicos mainly. I'm trying to get the Turks on board. That's the right move. Yeah. They're fighting right now and I'm just doing my best. What? What? The Caicos and the Turks. They're at it. The boys are at it again. You, Rig Dilby, went to officiate...

[00:25:26] Trying to mediate between the Caicos and the Turks. You went to officiate what I can best understand as a civil war. The Caico is a cake that's also an Oreo. It's like a cake-based Oreo. Oh, this is a... Okay. Yeah. Desserts. Turkish delight. Turks. Caicos. You get it. Do you think I'm talking about people? Yeah. That's offensive. I know. Why would they send me to arbitrate that? I know. That's a waste of time. That's what I'm getting at. These are Oreo cakes. Okay. And I'm on the side of Oreo cake. And if you had one, you'd be like, what are we doing with Turkish delight?

[00:25:55] Oreo cakes all day, every day, baby. But what do you mean? The desserts are feuding? What? Yeah. There's a group of people that are big Caicos. And there's a group of people that are big Turkish delight people. And I'm in Tulsa, Arizona. Oh. It's not Tulsa, Oklahoma. It's Tulsa, Arizona. Look it up. You said you were in Turks and Caicos. Yeah. I'm in the middle of this quag by a brand. Okay. Between the Turks and the Caicos. You can see how at best it was confusing. No. At worst it was misleading.

[00:26:23] You could have done a little bit of research here. It's national news. That's what I'm trying to do. Turks versus Caicos. If you had one Caicos, it would be over. I don't know. It's not even a discussion. In this movie, anytime someone says Order of the Lily. Yeah. Best of luck to you. Double drink if someone says horse. Oh, you're in big trouble. You won't make it. No. I dare you. I dare you to do it. But I can't get a job for this.

[00:26:53] We should check with legal. We should check. Dare them. Yeah. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have dared you. I know better than that. But you won't do it. You won't do it. You would have to take like a minuscule sip of like a Mick Ultra. That's the only way you'd make it through. Like if you're doing a full shot. You will die. Don't do it. Especially if you know how to waltz and you haven't yet. Yeah. So take it easy. Dance if you want to. What's her name? Not Lady P. What's her real name?

[00:27:23] Lady P? So Lacey. Princess P? Yeah. Lady P is what I call her. My Lady. My Lady P. Lacey, you know, is walking around the castle, the premises, with Henry. And Henry, you know, is showing her the paintings. And he shows her the painting of his deceased wife.

[00:27:45] And she then says, Lacey says, just looking at her, reminds me of the time that my mom was sick. And my mom pulled through. It's the best. It didn't die. It's the best. And man, I feel I could feel myself being in a moment like that where like you're trying to relate to somebody.

[00:28:09] And then you realize, oh, no, I just compared this man's deceased wife to my mom who pulled through. That's right. And that's not what you do. That's not what you do. It's like she tried to one up them, but then didn't. It's like I'm actually not even at your level. I'm just now realizing that. And so I found that to be really a really funny thing to do. And then what is this is tough because I know everybody deals with fears differently.

[00:28:39] I'm very afraid of heights, heights, very afraid of snakes. So let me know one to one. Snakes, horses, both animals, right? Snakes, food, sushi. So like, yes, keep going. I'm afraid of a lot. I'm afraid of basic living. But I'm very I'm afraid of snakes. And if I see that, like when I'm watching Survivor and they show snakes, I'm like, don't don't show it to me.

[00:29:09] But I still get on a merry-go-round if they had like a merry-go-round snake, right? Like this girl is afraid of horses and that makes her not want to get on a merry-go-round. Listen, we're not here. Every kid is different. Every kid is different. Nine year olds afraid of merry-go-round because afraid of horse was one that I couldn't quite grasp. You weren't like scratching your head at her being afraid of merry-go-round because she's afraid of horses? Nine years old.

[00:29:38] Yeah, it's a weird move. Like I like at some point as a parent, you're starting to try to introduce this to your child because if you have that big of fear, that's going to be tough as an adult. And as a parent, it's your job to like try to prepare your kid for adulthood. So like I'm not saying you jam them on a merry-go-round and while they're screaming, but nine years old, she's never seen it, never been on a merry-go-round. Yeah, that's like a that's like a toddler bit, right?

[00:30:05] Like you take your toddler on there, you get a picture holding the baby with the thing. Do the thing. I don't know. I was just confused. Like I am somebody who is afraid of most things. So like if anybody was to be understanding of this situation, it would be your boy brand. But it's a merry-go-round.

[00:30:23] And so that was a very interesting way to introduce the fact that she's afraid of horses is by her looking at a merry-go-round as if she's looking at an actual horse, which she was not. So that was an interesting move. Dana? Yeah. There is a full office complex on site at Once Upon a Time Land, which I love. There's a full office suite. It's not a dressing room.

[00:30:52] It is a full. Well, she has the dressing rooms in there. Yeah, I know. But you would think the dressing room would be in the castle somewhere or behind a stage or something. We're like underneath Disney World. Like if you go into Disney World, everything is designed to make you think it is all open to the public. And I'm sure there's some office spaces back there somewhere. Here at Once Upon a Time Land, we have a castle, but then we have a full set of office buildings right there in the park. And they're connected. So that's cool. That's awesome.

[00:31:20] Brain, you mentioned in your synopsis, but I do want to point out that this nine-year-old who is a princess and does princess things all day long, her dad wants to get her mind off of being princess and what's to come. So he takes her to a princess tea time at a royal theme park. Well, I don't know if you heard. They have offices there too. I know that you spreadsheet all day, Bri, but when you go on vacation, do you go to a spreadsheet camp?

[00:31:50] They have those? I mean, now you're interested, of course. I'm just saying. You asked the wrong person the wrong thing. Of all the things to take this princess to, it would make sense to get her away from any of the trappings of the things that she's afraid of or having anxiety about. Brian can't stop thinking about spreadsheet camp. He's like, he lost me. It's actually not a bad idea. Have any shortcuts you can learn? Nobody talks to me and I just work on spreadsheets all day? Oh, man. They just keep handing you stuff to calculate, organize. We just give you millions and millions of different combinations of numbers and you've got to just type them all in.

[00:32:19] Brian's going to start a new venture. Spreadsheet camp. Spreadsheet camp. I love it. For sure. For adults. There is a scene earlier in this movie, and I think for a brief moment, Hallmark doesn't know what channel they are. It's not what you thought about. Excel camp is not team building and whitewater rafting, and Brian wants no part of it. They're really tricky because it says Excel camp and the logo's green. Yeah. They're trying to get her in there. But then you go there and there's a whitewater rafting. This is just 15, 18-year-olds who wanted to discover God's truth. Yeah. It's a different type of thing. Nothing to do with it.

[00:32:49] You don't want that. Forget it. I'm sure there's a database somewhere there, though. Sure, it's a great camp, but it's not a spreadsheet camp. Maybe. 33 spreadsheet. No. The camp spreadsheet. No. Nope. We'll find out. I think this is an open. You should start one? This is something for an opening. And there are so many. Now, can I ask you this, guys? Sure. Now that we're going on this, you know, when you think of camp, you think of, you know, your standard campground, et cetera. There's many of them in the upstate area. Would this need to take place?

[00:33:17] Like, do you still go to a... I think you've got to go somewhere with, like, state-of-the-art, like, tech. Yeah. I'm sure. Some big screens. I didn't know if part of it was, like, we have internet outside, and you come and you do your, you know, your spreadsheets out by the lake. And occasionally you stop and you blob. I don't think that's what people interested. Occasionally you stop and blob. See, but the problem is, I don't... You're still interested in blobbing. Stop and blob? As long as you can get back to those spreadsheets. 100%. Yeah. I think that's a good mix.

[00:33:46] I think there's something there. People aren't thinking about how spreadsheeters also want to blob. Heavyweights, but with spreadsheets? Oh, my God. Heavyweights, but with spreadsheets. And a little nicer, not so mean? The Perkins sister. Hopefully a lot nicer. Anything else, Dana? Yeah, a lot more. I did more. I went down a rabbit trail. You brought it up. I did. I did bring it up, and that's totally fine. There's a scene early in this movie between our two leads, and he looks at her and goes, I have a proposition for you.

[00:34:13] And then you see a picture of her face, and she looks horrified, and he says, no, not that kind. What? Hallmark. Saucy. What were we doing with this scene here? A little troublemaker. A little troublemaker. That is not a little troublemaker. That's a weird, that's just a weird scene to have in this movie. And you had it, so congratulations. I do want to be very clear. If she cannot ride horse, she can ride in carriage. I said it in a hot take. It needs to be said again.

[00:34:42] All they need to know is they need a couple days ahead of time. That's all they need. If two days out, the prince goes, she's not doing the horse. They're going, great. She's in the carriage, and we've got to kick somebody out of the carriage. It's just like seating at a wedding. That's all this movie is. And we have a whole thing about it, which is crazy. At one point, she goes, not only am I going over to this foreign country, they're paying me double what I get paid now. Lady, you're a waitress and a princess. Like, that is, for the crown, that's nothing. You got robbed. You should have asked for more.

[00:35:11] You should have 100% asked for more. They probably didn't even realize the minimum wage in our country is $7.25 an hour. So for $14.50, you can come on over? For a royal family that has paid for three round trips to the theme park. No problem. And then I have two more. One is they go out, and he's disguised, in quotes, in the khaki baseball hat. And then everyone notices him and starts taking pictures of him.

[00:35:38] And Nicole Sakura steps up and goes, everybody form a line, and one by one you can come up, and I'll take a picture. And he's like, thank you so much. You're brilliant. All she did was just start an impromptu, infinite meet and greet. That's all she did. She did not help him there. Like, wouldn't it make more sense for him to wave and everyone just take pictures? And now she started something that can last hours and hours. Like, he wanted an afternoon out.

[00:36:07] And now it's like, it's a whole thing. And then, so Disney, Walt Disney has this thing where if you play a character in Disney World, you can never say that you played that character for as long as you live. I don't know if you knew this. Really? True. No, I didn't know that. So like, if you played like Aladdin. Yeah. After you played Aladdin. Which I didn't. You didn't. No. You couldn't say that. I hope not. After you played Aladdin the rest of your life, you could say, I worked at Disney. Sure. And people could say, what did you do? And you can say this exact line. I worked with Aladdin. That's what you could say.

[00:36:37] Okay. And then people can deduct that, but you can never say I was Aladdin. I still don't think, given that information, anyone would assume that you are Aladdin. No. I hope not. You would steer clear of any problems there. But we've met, we've met, we know someone who was a princess and that is what they say even to us, even though we know them. Right? So I get that. They take that idea. And in this movie, what happens is her boss tells her, you need to spend the day with this prince and his daughter. So then she does it.

[00:37:06] They're in the theme park. They're eating lunch in the theme park. Someone takes a picture of her as the princess eating lunch in the theme park. And then in the article writes her real name. And somehow that's her fault. She gets fired for that. I don't like that is not how that would work at all. I'm pretty sure she could like file a lawsuit of some sort. That's just not how that works.

[00:37:33] If you tell her that she's got to follow this prince around all day and somebody takes a picture of her and then leaks her name. How is she supposed to control that? There's nothing she can do there. Right? Like I just couldn't. That was a really on a movie built entirely around nine year old has to ride horse or carriage. That even made little sense to me. Now I'm done. Right. I thought when he called like and she was going to be like, I know it's against the rules. He was going to be like, no, I called the thank you.

[00:38:02] Like we've been getting so much publicity. No, you still went through with it. Still did it. Still fired her. Hands were tied. Hands were tied. You know the rules. It is a time for the what the hallmarks where we wonder what could have been. Maybe happy to declare any questions that we still have. Brian? Yeah. So it's actually about that photo. And when she got that photo sent to her, like that all happened so fast. So fast. Like who sent that to her? That was weeks ago. Yes. Right. It was. That happened a long time ago.

[00:38:29] And then so she got immediately she got a text of the picture and then her boss called. So where what where where did that photo go? Did that get sent just directly to her? Paparazzi. It was just so fast and random that like I wish they explained that a little bit more. So, yeah, I'm interested in the universe in which this movie takes place because in a like I have a hard time believing that once upon a time lands the best that this family could go to.

[00:38:57] Like in a universe in which potentially like Disney exists, you're not picking once upon a time land over Disney World. Right. You're not taking like a weird pop up fair with a castle over Disney World. So that would lead me to believe that this doesn't take place in our world, but a different world in which that's the best that they have as far as castle theme theme parks. And that's unfortunate.

[00:39:22] And so what what is is is is this theme park the Disney like what is it supposed to be? Is it supposed to be Disney World? You know, is it supposed to be this place where people can go and they can meet the princess like Disney World? Is this Disney World? Yeah, I think you've said it enough times. What is it? I think it is supposed to be exactly what Disney World is. And that is embarrassing. But that's what it's supposed to be. Even down to the rule about you can't tell anybody you're the princess. Right.

[00:39:51] All of that is straight from Disney without their they're above board. Like they're not getting anywhere near the line, but they want you to at least try to It's definitely not Disney. It's definitely not. It's a pop up fair. It's once upon a time land. Yeah. A terrible name for a theme park. Once upon a time land. Once upon a time land. Damn. Yeah. Mine is about the royal universe as a whole in the in the royal we I said, if we're going to waste our time with a wedding at the end of the third one where all these people

[00:40:20] come together, I'm out on this. If this is just a one line thing that I'm fine. I said that I wish I could take it back because what happens in these three movies is is someone somewhere at Hallmark went. What if they were all connected and they started off going, got it. And the first one, they're like planning the wedding and everybody's pictures popping on screen. And the second one, they're like, oh, we're still doing that. So they have one scene about it. And this one, it's like this horse is related to one of the other guys. Got why?

[00:40:50] Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why do we do it? Like just have them be their independent. What did you accomplish? Who did you please by adding these? 60 second scenes to these movies that ruin the endings of all three movies. Like, why did you do that? I just. I mean, this one, though, was the only one where it was a part of the like he proposes in this. Correct. So you can't make this movie without that scene. Yeah.

[00:41:18] After he proposes, though, there's a horse in the background. They're like the horse happens before. But then he proposes. I understand. You can do anything without that scene. I will say. No, all I'm saying is it's not a tag. What you're saying is it didn't feel tacked on. I understand that. But the first two 100 percent are. Yes, for sure. They have the the organic ending of the movie and then they go fade to black and then they come back up and they do another scene. This movie doesn't have that. But by this point, the connection is so incredibly thin.

[00:41:47] Like, why? Why are we doing that for people that do? There are people that freaking love like digging into theories of the way home or even like what's going to happen on when calls the heart or they love the mysteries. There's a lot of areas where you can make these threads connect. This seemed to be so half hearted and lazy. I didn't understand it. At least this one, though, didn't happen after a fade to black. You know, after they ran. They did fade to black. But then the next scene was important to your point. Yeah. Could have ended with a kiss. Could have. Yeah. Let's. We did it.

[00:42:17] We did it. Congratulations to us. It's time for Double Decker of the Week. Dum, bum, bum, bum. Double Decker of the Week. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Double Decker of the Week is where we dive deep. Brian does dive deep into the life of a double decker. Someone who has signed up for Bramble Jam Plus at the double decker tier or higher. They get a lot of other perks. But of course, one of them is Brian doing the deep dive. Bramblejamplus.com. That's right. That's right. Stephanie Lyerla. Stephanie Lyerla. That was good. Yeah.

[00:42:47] Stephanie. Yeah. Her. She's actually pretty easy to find info on Stephanie. Really? Yeah. This didn't take too much work. Usually I put a lot of work in. You guys know that. Yeah. This one didn't even have to really work that hard because Stephanie just became a champion recently. Won a championship. Okay. And now. So that's all. That's. That's top of the page news. What was her championship? Stephanie is a brand new Stairmaster champion. Stairmaster champion. I didn't know that was. There were competitions. Oh, yeah. Is it a race? Oh, yeah. Or like number of steps per.

[00:43:17] It's. No. That's a ridiculous question. Okay. What is it? All right. Well. Obviously. I mean, she went the longest. Staring at someone. Yes. Of course. Without blink. Which is weird because she was called Blinks for years. But. She was called Blinks for years. Those are nicknames. Those are nicknames. Those are nicknames. Blinks. Why? Stephanie. She would blink a lot. Blinks. Oh. She was bullied for how much she blinked. Yeah. And then she became a Stairmaster champion.

[00:43:47] Go over camera. Isn't that redundant? Yeah. Well. Stairmaster champion. But. You know. Emphasis. We have to recognize that she's a champion. She's a Stairmaster. She's a Stairmaster. So she's a champion. Stairmaster implies there could be more than one master though. Stairmaster champion. Well. I mean. She's not the champion of every championship that's ever been done. So there are others. Was it a one and done? Stairmaster champion. Yeah. Hmm. Was it a one and done or did they do this every year? Well. She was going to have to defend. So how. Oh. So she has to come back. Because there'll be challengers. How long did she stare? She stared. Store? No. Stair. Stair.

[00:44:19] She stared. She stared. How long have you been storing? She stared for the exact. I think it was like 47 minutes. Without blinking. So that's not a world record. Yeah. It didn't actually seem like it was super high time. 47 minutes seems like a long time. Yeah. I would say it seemed I was underwound by it. I was overwhelmed. Really? Wow. 47 minutes without blinking. I feel like there's people out there that don't need to blink. Man. There's people out there that don't need to blink. They don't need to blink. That's what I've heard. 47 minutes is a pretty long time.

[00:44:48] It's a little troublemaker. Can you imagine if you didn't have to blink? The longest. It actually is a world record 47 minutes, guys. Thanks, Brian, for doing the deep dive. No. 57 is what I've seen. The world record for the longest stare without blinking is 40 minutes and 59 seconds. I have some different information on that. Wow. Somebody in a China service. And the person that was a participant, the two were Stairmaster Stag and Eyesore Fleming. Yeah. I think that's a US. No, I did not. No, I found that after, actually.

[00:45:17] I heard about Stephanie. You've heard about it. You've done the research, obviously. So did Stairmaster Stephanie and any of these other people, did they compete? Or was this like a... She took out the Stag. She took out the Stag. She did take out the Stag. Wow. Yeah, obviously. You got to watch out for the Stag. That's amazing. So she's out there crushing it. Congratulations. That's huge. That's huge. Strong Irish. We're going to actually be back, I think it's tomorrow. All right. Is it tomorrow?

[00:45:46] Tomorrow's a Thursday for the Mystery Island. Thursday. We're back on Thursday. Brian, come on back Thursday. Sure. We'll talk about the Mystery Island Deuce. So come on back for that. Until they move the first to wish you a Merry Christmas. Deck the Hallmark's a Bramble Jam podcast is produced by Aaron Shea. What? For more information on Deck the Hallmark, you can go to deckthehallmark.com. For more information on the Deck the Hallmark family, you can go to bramblejamplus.com. Deck the Hallmark is presented by Philo TV.

[00:46:13] For a free trial of Philo, go to philo.tv slash dth. You're about to hear some ads that help keep the lights on here in the old studio. Thanks for listening or don't listen. And it's really up to you at this point. It's at the end of the show. I mean, you're listening to me. Hi. But here they come. I promise they're coming. Yep. Here they are. Happy day. At the end of the show for 3 Bro or V income love history or Ahhh parlows 7 o tanto off the Aussie exceptional life of a suck.