The Merry Gentlemen (Netflix - 2024) ft. Alonso Duralde & Jacklyn Collier

[00:00:00] Hi, I'm Bran and I love Netflix Christmas movies. I'm Dan, I despise Netflix Christmas movies. I'm Jax and this is gonna be my mom's favorite movie of the year. I'm Alonso and can you retract a cream and this is the Deck The Hallmark Podcast.

[00:00:19] Deck The Hallmark, it's this podcast. Friends host this podcast. We hope you like this jolly podcast.

[00:00:37] You perverts out there, tuning in to the stripper movie. Come on guys.

[00:00:45] Dude, saying this is a stripper movie is like saying it's a movie.

[00:00:51] Oh, you stop it. It's great to be here today. Happy Thanksgiving week everybody. We made it.

[00:00:59] And this is a big deal because Deck Netflix has taken a week off. I know.

[00:01:03] Because of how many other movies we have, but we're gonna get back to it. Lindsay Lohan will be there when we get back.

[00:01:08] The Lohana-sans waits for Deck The Netflix in fact.

[00:01:11] That's true.

[00:01:12] That's true.

[00:01:13] Always said it.

[00:01:13] What are you guys doing for Thanksgiving? Jax, are you going anywhere for Thanksgiving?

[00:01:19] Uh, no. So, um, you know, the fact that we canceled our recording.

[00:01:24] Um, I'm just gonna kind of sit around and think about you guys. No, I'm just, I'm going to go back to Pennsylvania.

[00:01:30] Look out the window wistfully.

[00:01:32] It wasn't canceled. We were never doing it to begin with.

[00:01:35] That's true.

[00:01:35] And I do want that on the record.

[00:01:36] No, no, you're right. Honestly, it wasn't you guys. It was me just hoping against hope that we spend the holiday together.

[00:01:43] No, I'm going back to Pennsylvania, but just for the day, we'll be talking about all of the movies that have come out so far. I'm sure my family will be very excited to give me all their thoughts.

[00:01:53] And you're gonna play Christmas Movie Magic with them?

[00:01:55] Of course you are.

[00:01:56] I'm sure, yeah.

[00:01:56] You're gonna play this?

[00:01:57] Card game that's sweeping the nation.

[00:01:59] I've already been playing with them.

[00:02:00] Well, and I gotta say, I gotta say, it's perfect for this week.

[00:02:04] Yeah.

[00:02:04] There's so many movies that are gonna be premiering this week. And so the fact that we have this game, Christmas Movie Magic, DeckTheHalmark.com slash game, it's perfect.

[00:02:11] You don't want to have conversations with family members. You want to just like, have one of fun group activities.

[00:02:15] You want to beat them soundly in a game.

[00:02:17] That's exactly right.

[00:02:18] Everybody knows you got like one good day. And then the rest of the week, you're like, well, I mean, what do we do now?

[00:02:23] So now you can do this. You can watch the Christmas movies and you can have a lot of fun.

[00:02:27] I'm excited to play with my family.

[00:02:29] Of course.

[00:02:29] This Thanksgiving.

[00:02:30] Yeah.

[00:02:31] What about you, Alonzo?

[00:02:32] Well, Dave's very excited about cooking because the last couple of years with the old hips and all, he was not really down for it.

[00:02:39] But now that he is all robo-hipped up, he is, we're getting the turkey. We're doing the whole thing. Friends are coming over. They're gonna bring stuff. It's gonna be awesome.

[00:02:48] And if you are on watching us on Philo, philo.tv slash DTH, you'll see behind me that we have begun the actual Christmas decorating process for the apartment.

[00:03:00] And if you want to follow that process more closely, check out our Instagram account, DXAXtree, where you see all of our Christmas stuff as it comes out of the boxes and goes on to the show.

[00:03:11] I was gonna say that.

[00:03:13] Yeah, I was gonna say, I knew you were decorating already, Alonzo, because I follow the account.

[00:03:17] And that's, I mean, it's the follow of the holiday season, I feel like.

[00:03:20] It is. It is. 100%.

[00:03:22] For sure.

[00:03:22] 100% it is.

[00:03:23] Yeah.

[00:03:24] What are you doing?

[00:03:25] You know, just doing my normal Thanksgiving thing that I do every year.

[00:03:29] Are you gonna ignore me like you did last year?

[00:03:31] What do you mean ignore you?

[00:03:32] You know what you did last year.

[00:03:33] You went to your family's house.

[00:03:34] You know what you did last year.

[00:03:35] I went to the aquarium. What are you talking about?

[00:03:37] I came over to your house, I knocked on the door, and you didn't answer it.

[00:03:41] Really?

[00:03:41] Yeah.

[00:03:41] I wasn't home?

[00:03:44] You put a 10-foot inflatable penguin in your backyard facing me.

[00:03:50] It was an abominable snowman.

[00:03:52] Facing me?

[00:03:53] Yes.

[00:03:53] Not facing the street. Nobody on the street could see it.

[00:03:56] That's right.

[00:03:56] Facing me.

[00:03:57] Saying, hi, Daniel.

[00:03:58] That's right.

[00:03:59] Yes.

[00:04:00] Okay, so I don't want to hear it.

[00:04:02] Now, Daniel, you are Mr., like, we have the meats.

[00:04:06] Like, you've got your big sort of barbecue smoker thing in the yard.

[00:04:10] Yes.

[00:04:11] Do you, like, do a turkey up?

[00:04:13] I hate, I notoriously hate turkey.

[00:04:16] I think it's the most overrated thing.

[00:04:17] Last year, my kids wanted a full Thanksgiving dinner.

[00:04:19] I did smoke a turkey.

[00:04:20] I thought it came out pretty well.

[00:04:22] Typically, I do a beef tenderloin.

[00:04:25] Nice.

[00:04:26] I don't know what I'm going to go with this year.

[00:04:28] Undecided.

[00:04:29] I typically lean on something, like, anything beef-related for that, like, if I can.

[00:04:34] So, like, we, you know, some years we do charcuterie.

[00:04:36] We get a charcuterie plate and we just do that.

[00:04:39] You know, I'm kind of anti the traditional Thanksgiving spread.

[00:04:43] You can read about that in I'll Be Home for Christmas movies.

[00:04:45] My essay is about how I hate Thanksgiving food.

[00:04:47] So it's not.

[00:04:48] Steak Party 28.

[00:04:49] Steak Party 28.

[00:04:50] We need it now more than ever.

[00:04:52] More than ever.

[00:04:53] More than ever.

[00:04:53] Wait until you see our cabinets.

[00:04:55] Oh, my goodness.

[00:04:56] It's A1 sauce.

[00:04:57] It is a lot of different seasonings.

[00:04:59] It better not be A1 sauce.

[00:05:00] It's jam-packed.

[00:05:01] I don't even know how we got this much space in the cabinet, but we did.

[00:05:07] Yeah, that's right.

[00:05:08] Yes.

[00:05:09] Erin.

[00:05:10] Hi, Erin.

[00:05:10] Hi.

[00:05:10] Can I ask a question, a clarifying question about last Thanksgiving for Brandon?

[00:05:14] Sure, yeah.

[00:05:15] You're upset you didn't see Dan when he invited you over to help with the turkey, but you

[00:05:19] never showed up.

[00:05:20] That's right.

[00:05:21] That's the Thanksgiving you're upset about?

[00:05:22] Oh, yeah.

[00:05:22] Erin was at my house.

[00:05:23] Erin was at my house for Thanksgiving, so she can confirm all of those.

[00:05:28] All I know is I woke up at 5 a.m., and we had an agreement.

[00:05:33] We were going to wake up.

[00:05:34] We were going to hug.

[00:05:35] We were going to look at each other in the eyes.

[00:05:36] We were going to wake up, hug, and look at each other in the eyes and say, I'm thankful

[00:05:39] for you and do our mantra, and I knocked on the door.

[00:05:42] I can confirm Dan was awake at that hour.

[00:05:44] I was.

[00:05:45] Yeah.

[00:05:45] Because his kids wanted to go to the aquarium.

[00:05:47] That's right.

[00:05:47] So that hurts even more.

[00:05:50] I'm beginning to think you didn't knock on his door at all.

[00:05:52] Brains of Liars is what you should take away from this.

[00:05:54] That's what you should take away.

[00:05:55] Do you want to do it right now?

[00:05:56] Also, is last Thanksgiving when you tried eggnog around that time?

[00:06:01] Around that time.

[00:06:02] Yeah.

[00:06:02] A little before then.

[00:06:03] Probably like early November when we started Nogger Clock.

[00:06:05] You told Sarah about it.

[00:06:05] Yeah.

[00:06:06] That's right.

[00:06:07] Sarah, have you heard about this stuff?

[00:06:08] You heard about this eggnog?

[00:06:09] You heard about this eggnog?

[00:06:10] Sarah had not heard about it.

[00:06:11] Eggnog?

[00:06:12] Yeah.

[00:06:12] Sarah couldn't believe I liked eggnog.

[00:06:13] Let's talk married gentlemen, shall we?

[00:06:16] Hello, Mr. Mary.

[00:06:17] Oh, let's.

[00:06:18] Gentlemen.

[00:06:18] I am thankful for you.

[00:06:19] I want that on the record.

[00:06:21] I'm thankful for you.

[00:06:22] Hold hands.

[00:06:25] It's perfect.

[00:06:26] No.

[00:06:27] The Merry Gentleman originally premiered on Netflix on November 20th, 2024, and it went

[00:06:33] a little something like this.

[00:06:34] The movie kicks off in the big city for the annual Jingle Bells live show.

[00:06:40] They're a knockoff rocket team.

[00:06:43] The people love it, though.

[00:06:45] Everyone else that watches the movie does not.

[00:06:49] They're not good.

[00:06:50] But in the middle of all this.

[00:06:52] So little is.

[00:06:53] In the middle of it all, though, is Ashley Davis.

[00:06:56] She is a legend who has apparently been doing the Jingle Bells show for 12 years.

[00:07:01] Her boss asked to see her one night.

[00:07:03] And after a show, tells her that she's not being aged out.

[00:07:08] No.

[00:07:09] But she is being replaced.

[00:07:10] She doesn't even get.

[00:07:12] By someone much younger.

[00:07:12] And then they call her Lacey by accident, I believe.

[00:07:16] I don't know.

[00:07:16] That's crazy.

[00:07:17] Oh, that's sad.

[00:07:21] Took you a second.

[00:07:22] I know.

[00:07:22] I was like, wait, that didn't happen.

[00:07:24] It did happen in real life, though.

[00:07:26] Yeah, that was your.

[00:07:28] Allegedly.

[00:07:29] She doesn't even get.

[00:07:31] They can't sue us.

[00:07:33] She doesn't even get to finish out the season.

[00:07:36] She leaves and she screams.

[00:07:39] A real thing that happened in this movie.

[00:07:41] She goes home to watch some Netflix Christmas movies, as you do in a Netflix Christmas movie.

[00:07:47] It is legally required.

[00:07:48] And drowns her sorrow in popcorn.

[00:07:50] Her mom calls and says that since they know that she's too busy to come home, they're going to come to her.

[00:07:56] They even bought tickets for the Jingle Bells.

[00:07:58] And she says, no, no, that won't be necessary.

[00:08:01] I will come to you.

[00:08:03] So she heads to her hometown of Sycamore Creek and is dropped off at the Rhythm Room.

[00:08:08] The Rhythm.

[00:08:08] I've heard about this.

[00:08:09] And I don't know if you've heard about this, Dan, but I've actually heard it's going to get you.

[00:08:12] Yeah, Rhythm is going to get you.

[00:08:14] Rhythm's going to get you, man.

[00:08:15] It's going to get you.

[00:08:15] She immediately.

[00:08:16] Thank you, Alonzo.

[00:08:17] She immediately gets tangled up in some garland that a hunk is putting on the lamppost outside.

[00:08:23] The Rhythm Room is a venue that her parents own.

[00:08:27] They hug and the parents immediately go to meet with a woman who owns the building.

[00:08:32] Turns out the landlord keeps raising the rent on them, making it hard for the venue to bring in big artists, which makes it hard to make money, which makes it hard to fix faucets.

[00:08:43] That's right, everybody.

[00:08:44] The faucets are broken.

[00:08:45] But who needs money to fix faucets when you have Luke?

[00:08:48] Luke is the garland guy from before, and he comes in.

[00:08:51] He helps with repairs as they need him.

[00:08:53] He agrees to give Ashley a ride to her sister's house, and they spend the ride talking and getting to know each other a little bit.

[00:09:01] The next day, she heads down to the venue, and it doesn't take long for Luke to show up shirtless.

[00:09:06] She finds out that her parents are in quite the bind.

[00:09:12] There's a juice bar that's interested in not only taking over the lease, but back paying the six months that they are behind with the rent.

[00:09:20] When all is said and done, her parents owe $30,000.

[00:09:25] But something that the landlord says inspires Ashley to put together an all-male dance crew that will bring in the people.

[00:09:33] And who better to lead this team than the shirtless Luke?

[00:09:37] She will call them the married gentlemen.

[00:09:40] That's the damn of the barfinger!

[00:09:41] Oh, my God!

[00:09:41] Oh, my gosh!

[00:09:43] Luke is hesitant at first, but if it helps save the rhythm room, he'll give it a shot.

[00:09:47] She recruits the hunky bartender and her sister's husband, who also happens to have been a stripper for bachelorette parties.

[00:09:55] It's a different time, okay?

[00:09:56] She works on coming up with a routine, and the guys are taking it seriously.

[00:10:02] Luke doesn't feel like he's getting it, so they slow dance together to help him understand the beats and the movements and whatnot.

[00:10:09] And the sparks begin to fly.

[00:10:11] It's finally time for the big debut of The Merry Gentleman.

[00:10:16] And Luke is freaking out, breathing into a bag.

[00:10:19] What if people don't like my body?

[00:10:21] Yeah, it's tough when you're...

[00:10:24] Luckily, Ashley has some tricks that she picked up over the years to help with the nerves.

[00:10:29] It's called hard drugs.

[00:10:30] I'm kidding.

[00:10:32] The tickets are $30 a pop, and the crowd, they love it.

[00:10:37] The boys crush it.

[00:10:39] The crowd loves it.

[00:10:40] Everybody is into it.

[00:10:42] The night is a success.

[00:10:43] The landlord tells Ashley to keep up the great work.

[00:10:46] She's interested to see how this works out for her.

[00:10:48] Luke congratulates Ashley on her big success, gives her a necklace, a little soon for that, and asks to walk her home.

[00:10:56] They get some pizza and really start to open up to one another.

[00:10:59] She didn't expect to enjoy choreographing.

[00:11:03] You got it.

[00:11:04] That's what you say?

[00:11:04] And directing a show as much as she did.

[00:11:07] She thought she'd missed the performing, but she didn't.

[00:11:09] She finds another dancer, and they start putting together some new dances, because everyone knows four is better than three.

[00:11:17] Everything is going great.

[00:11:19] They're even selling out.

[00:11:21] But one of the guys slips and falls, spraining his ankle just before showtime of one of the shows.

[00:11:27] This throws the boys off.

[00:11:29] We can't when we're used to having four on stage.

[00:11:32] You can't dance with three.

[00:11:34] So they have to pause the show to figure something out.

[00:11:36] Luckily, there's a guy named Danny who's just always at the bar doing crossword puzzles and has learned the dances through osmosis, and he joins in on the fun.

[00:11:47] It works.

[00:11:48] Another successful night.

[00:11:50] And after the December 21st show, they're only about $10,000 shorts.

[00:11:55] Ashley goes to talk to Luke some more in his barn.

[00:11:58] Talking leads to dancing, and dancing leads to kissing.

[00:12:02] They are so close to the $30,000 goal when Ashley gets a call from her old boss.

[00:12:08] They have a 911 situation, and they need her back ASAP.

[00:12:12] They are willing to give her a 25% raise and a three-year contract.

[00:12:18] The problem?

[00:12:19] She needs to be back by the big Christmas Day show, which would have her flying out on Christmas Eve.

[00:12:26] She goes to talk to her parents, and they tell her that she has to take the offer.

[00:12:31] It's her dream.

[00:12:32] You don't get these opportunities all the time.

[00:12:34] So she texts the boss, and she takes the offer.

[00:12:37] Luke, however, does not take this news well.

[00:12:39] The city girl always does the same thing, he says as he storms off looking great.

[00:12:45] The only reason I was doing this show is because I was inspired by you.

[00:12:49] She heads off to the airport before she can make things right with Luke, and he goes on stage to attempt his routine, but he can't do it.

[00:12:59] Suddenly, she walks in, and he can dance again.

[00:13:03] She tells him that she could do it.

[00:13:09] Oh, oh, oh, oh.

[00:13:10] She tells him, I tried to leave.

[00:13:13] I tried to get to the airport, but I just couldn't do it.

[00:13:14] And so they celebrate with a big kiss, complete with a lift.

[00:13:18] Lift.

[00:13:19] A lift.

[00:13:19] They all celebrate Christmas together with Christmas dinner in the Rhythm Room.

[00:13:24] She gives the landlord all the money, and she joins the table, and they share one more kiss.

[00:13:31] And that, my friends, was the Merry Gentleman.

[00:13:38] Did it.

[00:13:40] Let's take a quick break, everybody.

[00:13:42] We're going to come back.

[00:13:42] We're going to break down the Merry Gentleman here on Deck the Hallmark.

[00:13:54] Brian, this show is sponsored by BetterHelp.

[00:13:56] It is the time of gratitude right now, Brian, and there's so much to be thankful for, including the people in your life that just make you feel great.

[00:14:03] For me, that's my family.

[00:14:04] That's my wife, my kids.

[00:14:06] Seeing them every day puts a smile on my face.

[00:14:08] And while that's amazing, sometimes during the holiday season, that's tough for some people who may have lost someone that used to put a smile on their face or wish they had someone to put a smile on their face.

[00:14:17] And so while it's the time of gratitude, it's also a time to think about mental health and about how important it is to make sure you're doing everything you can to be the kind of person you want to be around.

[00:14:28] That's right, Dan.

[00:14:29] And that's why I'm so happy that we've partnered with BetterHelp once again this holiday season.

[00:14:33] Because let's face it, holiday season is busy time.

[00:14:36] And lots of times you think about therapy, and one of the hurdles is actually going to therapy.

[00:14:42] And you don't got to do that with BetterHelp.

[00:14:44] You don't got to go anywhere.

[00:14:45] You can just sit in the comfort of your home and talk to somebody about whatever you need to talk about.

[00:14:51] I've used BetterHelp in the past, and it really is as simple as logging in and just talking.

[00:14:57] And you would be surprised to find out how helpful that actually is, Dan.

[00:15:01] Yeah, you're 100% right, and it's all in the comfort of your own home.

[00:15:05] Let the gratitude flow with BetterHelp.

[00:15:07] Visit BetterHelp.com slash Hallmark today to get 10% off your first month.

[00:15:11] That's BetterHelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash Hallmark.

[00:15:22] Welcome back, everybody.

[00:15:23] We're talking about The Merry Gentleman, the latest flick from Netflix.

[00:15:28] Let's break it down.

[00:15:30] Let's talk about it.

[00:15:30] We're going to start with a hot take.

[00:15:31] It's where we share exactly how we felt about this movie.

[00:15:33] We do not hold back, and I will start with you, Jax.

[00:15:36] Jax, what did you think about The Merry Gentleman?

[00:15:40] Before I dive into this, am I giving two peppermint mochas energy?

[00:15:44] I feel like I'm a little bit slow and behind.

[00:15:47] You are a little bit slow and behind, but it's not too bad.

[00:15:50] It's not two peppermint mochas bad.

[00:15:51] It's just a little bad.

[00:15:54] It's not two peppermint mochas bad.

[00:15:55] It's one peppermint mocha bad.

[00:15:56] Okay, then we will forge ahead.

[00:15:57] Yes.

[00:15:58] One peppermint mocha.

[00:15:59] Okay, so to me, this very much felt like a parody of a Hallmark Christmas movie down

[00:16:10] to Chad Michael Murray's awful hair or wig.

[00:16:14] Same with Britt Roberson and her wig, but it wasn't funny enough to be a proper parody.

[00:16:20] But they did hit all the beats of what a parody of this would be.

[00:16:24] Although I have to say, what really did have me laughing, even though this whole thing

[00:16:28] wasn't very funny or that good.

[00:16:31] It was fun.

[00:16:32] I had a good time.

[00:16:33] It wasn't great.

[00:16:36] It was fun.

[00:16:37] But at the end, we're all used to these, the tropes in the Hallmark Christmas movies of

[00:16:44] the end when it's the recital or the big performance and it's emotional because they just can't go

[00:16:50] on until they see that person in the crowd.

[00:16:52] And seeing Chad Michael Murray play that with such earnest, like perfection, he can't take

[00:17:01] his shirt off.

[00:17:02] He can't strip it out there.

[00:17:04] Don't make me sing.

[00:17:05] I was laughing so hard.

[00:17:06] I was like crying.

[00:17:08] It was honestly, it made the movie for me.

[00:17:12] Beth Broderick and Michael Gross are great as the parents.

[00:17:15] Yeah, this is not like there's a lot of movies out there this year.

[00:17:18] You don't need to watch this one.

[00:17:19] But if you want to see some hot men shirtless, go for it.

[00:17:25] I told my mom today, I was like, you got to watch this one.

[00:17:29] So go for it if that's your thing.

[00:17:31] As someone who looks very similar to Chad Michael Murray when I have my shirt off, I get it.

[00:17:38] Just because you have an amazing body doesn't make it any easier to take your shirt off.

[00:17:43] So when you're some piece of meat, you can still be like self-conscious about that.

[00:17:47] That's exactly right.

[00:17:49] Alonzo, you get it as well.

[00:17:50] What are your thoughts?

[00:17:52] Yeah, for sure.

[00:17:54] Oh boy.

[00:17:55] This movie just strikes me as such a failure of nerve.

[00:17:58] Yeah.

[00:17:59] This is a male stripper movie where the pants stay on.

[00:18:02] Yeah, they wear pants the whole movie.

[00:18:04] They wear pants the whole movie.

[00:18:06] It reminded me of, this is a fun little bit of recent television history.

[00:18:10] So the soap opera, I want to say As the World Turns, had a gay couple.

[00:18:18] It was a big deal for daytime TV.

[00:18:19] They were known as Nuke.

[00:18:21] It was Luke and Noah.

[00:18:23] And they had kind of been teasing out this relationship for over a year.

[00:18:28] Finally, when the guys consummate, it happens off screen.

[00:18:32] But we see them walking out of the bathroom where they have both just showered.

[00:18:35] And apparently, the original intent was like they were going to come out wrapped in towels.

[00:18:39] And the network was like, no, no, no, no.

[00:18:41] We cannot handle that on daytime TV.

[00:18:43] So they come out wearing jeans with towels wrapped around their necks.

[00:18:49] Oh my gosh.

[00:18:50] And this movie has the energy of somebody who just took a shower and then immediately puts a pair of jeans on.

[00:18:57] So yeah, the point of Netflix is to be not Hallmark.

[00:19:00] But you could have run this movie on Hallmark.

[00:19:03] You could have run this movie on Up.

[00:19:04] Yeah, you could have run it on Up.

[00:19:06] That's exactly right.

[00:19:10] I loved it.

[00:19:12] And I do want to say, I think it's possible.

[00:19:16] It's the most embarrassing thing you've said or done today.

[00:19:17] I think it's possible that Netflix made a stripper movie where in their mind as they were doing it.

[00:19:24] It's not a stripper movie.

[00:19:25] Would Brand be comfortable with the stripper movie?

[00:19:29] And they pushed it just to that limit and not any further.

[00:19:34] Okay, when you're at Myrtle Beach and you see a guy in a Speedo, do you like blanch?

[00:19:38] Oh my gosh.

[00:19:39] No, it's fine.

[00:19:40] But it's like, you know, the stripper movie, you were like, how far are they going to go with this?

[00:19:44] And it was never to the point where I was like.

[00:19:46] Based upon the pictures ahead of time, they were going to go pretty far.

[00:19:49] They didn't.

[00:19:50] I unironically thoroughly enjoyed this movie.

[00:19:54] I had an absolute blast.

[00:19:56] I teared up at one point.

[00:19:58] Maybe I was swept up in Christmas spirit.

[00:20:01] And not only did I enjoy this, this is my favorite Netflix Christmas movie of the year.

[00:20:06] I had a blast.

[00:20:08] You are.

[00:20:08] This is impressive.

[00:20:10] Brand stamp of approval.

[00:20:11] I had a great time.

[00:20:12] It's the worst take you've given all year.

[00:20:14] Thank you.

[00:20:15] I'm honored.

[00:20:16] It's the worst take you've given all year.

[00:20:17] I'm honored to be here.

[00:20:18] I didn't realize Brand's integrity was on the table, but now I realize it's less than I thought.

[00:20:24] Yeah.

[00:20:24] Yeah.

[00:20:25] Listen, this movie could have been a mildly saucy email.

[00:20:30] It is a movie.

[00:20:31] I love a mildly saucy email.

[00:20:33] It is a movie that Trojan horses in a bland Hallmark plot by telling you it's a male stripper movie.

[00:20:40] It isn't a male stripper movie.

[00:20:43] This movie without the, and I'm going to quote the dancing numbers in this movie, without the dancing,

[00:20:50] without the credits, this movie's 80 minutes.

[00:20:52] Without the dancing, it's probably close to 60.

[00:20:55] All of it falls flat.

[00:20:57] The only thing that has any semblance of working here is Britt Roberson and Chad Michael Murray do have pretty good chemistry together.

[00:21:05] The rest of this movie could not be bothered to care.

[00:21:10] I did not get parody vibes at all, Jax.

[00:21:13] In fact, if I had gotten parody vibes, that would have been awesome.

[00:21:16] Those are the vibes I got from Confessions of a Christmas Letter, which a lot of people hated on Hallmark,

[00:21:20] and I was like, at least it's funny.

[00:21:22] This movie is not funny.

[00:21:24] It is dreadfully boring.

[00:21:26] How do you make a movie where they're trying to save the local bar with an all-male review boring?

[00:21:33] It is like an actively boring, bland, bad time.

[00:21:39] It is by far the worst of these movies.

[00:21:42] They're getting worse each week, but this one jumped off a cliff.

[00:21:45] I just – what was promised in this movie was a movie you couldn't – Alon's already said this.

[00:21:53] This was a movie that you couldn't air on Hallmark.

[00:21:55] Wrong.

[00:21:56] You could air this on Hallmark.

[00:21:58] This was less scandalous than Hot Frosty.

[00:22:02] You could – Netflix is just purely not taking advantage of the fact that they're Netflix.

[00:22:09] In Hot Frosty's defense, that snowman didn't have pants on.

[00:22:12] He didn't have pants on.

[00:22:13] If he had started with pants, then I'm sure they would have preferred him to keep those on too.

[00:22:17] I don't know.

[00:22:18] I don't know.

[00:22:19] Here's what I do know is that if you want to make a good movie that's chased, great.

[00:22:24] Great.

[00:22:24] Hallmark has done a few of those this year and will throw out a few more next year, I'm sure.

[00:22:30] Your Netflix, you can make that movie if you want, and that's fine.

[00:22:33] I don't think you have to be scandalous or spicy to make a good movie,

[00:22:38] but that was kind of inherent in the promise of the film,

[00:22:42] and it was – not only was it not that, it also wasn't good.

[00:22:45] It was bland and boring and could have – literally, guys,

[00:22:50] I can't explain to you how little happens in this movie.

[00:22:53] I just – I have so few wait-wats.

[00:22:55] At what point I wrote down, what is this movie going to do for the next 50 minutes?

[00:22:59] Turns out nothing.

[00:23:01] Turns out one guy gets injured and another guy joins.

[00:23:03] They don't do anything.

[00:23:06] This movie was actively bad across the board, and I can't believe it.

[00:23:09] Real, real bad.

[00:23:12] Yeah, but she's playing with a bunch of grumpy gills today.

[00:23:16] It's time for all the feels.

[00:23:18] How many Goodfella think she's making a joke?

[00:23:19] She said, what I'm hearing is Dan wanted to see more skin and gyrating.

[00:23:23] Yes.

[00:23:23] Yes.

[00:23:24] Yes.

[00:23:25] Like, yeah, that's not a joke.

[00:23:27] Not enough but.

[00:23:28] Like, this movie, I don't understand why you would have this movie

[00:23:32] and not have that be a part of this movie.

[00:23:35] I don't get it.

[00:23:36] Bad movie.

[00:23:37] And it's not like by depriving us of those things,

[00:23:40] they made up for it in other ways with dialogue or performances or whatever.

[00:23:45] Like, no.

[00:23:46] That was all this movie had going for it, and we don't even get that.

[00:23:50] Yeah.

[00:23:50] Yeah.

[00:23:51] It's terrible.

[00:23:52] It's a real bad movie.

[00:23:53] Well, it's time for all the feels.

[00:23:55] This is where we talk about what in this video game is feels.

[00:23:57] Jax?

[00:24:01] Wait for it.

[00:24:01] Oh, I do just want to be clear before I launch into my feels.

[00:24:06] But no, I don't think they thought they were making a parody.

[00:24:09] I think it looked like a parody with the awful hair.

[00:24:12] Like, it looked like something you'd see on SNL,

[00:24:15] but not as funny as SNL.

[00:24:16] Does that make sense?

[00:24:17] It wasn't funny enough to be a parody.

[00:24:20] Yes, exactly.

[00:24:21] Exactly.

[00:24:22] Yeah.

[00:24:23] Okay.

[00:24:24] So I, look, I, as a proud bisexual woman,

[00:24:29] I do find men attractive,

[00:24:31] but I don't find men attractive when they're stripping.

[00:24:34] I'd much rather see women take their clothes off,

[00:24:36] but I don't think that's going to happen anytime soon.

[00:24:38] So I wasn't really like all horned up for this one.

[00:24:41] So I didn't get many feels,

[00:24:43] but the biggest feel I got was that when Robertson gets that chocolate cookie

[00:24:51] all over her gosh darn face,

[00:24:53] and instead of it being a little spot,

[00:24:55] she just is covered in it and is a mess of a human being.

[00:24:59] She, I just was like,

[00:25:00] oh, she's really funny and adorable.

[00:25:04] So that was,

[00:25:04] that was my feel for this one.

[00:25:08] Alonzo.

[00:25:09] That's a real specific fetish,

[00:25:11] but okay.

[00:25:11] Okay.

[00:25:12] A lot about what Jack says was information.

[00:25:14] I didn't know,

[00:25:15] but I know now.

[00:25:16] It's always good to know.

[00:25:18] It's good to know.

[00:25:19] And I file that one away.

[00:25:21] I was amused when,

[00:25:22] when Britt Robertson is getting fired from the dance troupe,

[00:25:25] when the,

[00:25:26] the HR lady is like,

[00:25:28] we're talking about our family.

[00:25:29] And it's like,

[00:25:30] that is such an awful thing that employers try to do.

[00:25:33] Well,

[00:25:33] mainly when they're trying to,

[00:25:34] you know,

[00:25:35] exploit you or whatever.

[00:25:36] Oh,

[00:25:36] we're all just one big family here.

[00:25:37] No,

[00:25:38] no,

[00:25:38] we're not.

[00:25:38] I make it clear.

[00:25:39] We're not a big family around here.

[00:25:40] I make it very clear.

[00:25:42] This is a,

[00:25:42] let's,

[00:25:43] let's not even get on that one.

[00:25:45] Mainly with your language.

[00:25:49] The,

[00:25:49] I,

[00:25:50] I liked the fact that we get the date by the,

[00:25:53] by the marquee of the club.

[00:25:55] Like they didn't do the usual,

[00:25:57] like let's open the advent calendar door or whatever.

[00:26:00] Like that was,

[00:26:01] that was new and different and using the space.

[00:26:03] I thought,

[00:26:03] okay,

[00:26:04] good job.

[00:26:05] I know I was getting desperate for some feels here.

[00:26:07] That dog,

[00:26:08] that dog,

[00:26:10] it's a great dog.

[00:26:10] That dog's a star.

[00:26:13] And a star in the bloopers too.

[00:26:15] Yeah.

[00:26:15] I didn't watch the bloopers.

[00:26:16] I was so mad at this movie.

[00:26:17] I didn't watch the bloopers.

[00:26:18] I stuck through.

[00:26:19] Yeah.

[00:26:19] And I had,

[00:26:20] I have to say like for a movie that is this generally cruddy,

[00:26:24] the casting was pretty good.

[00:26:26] Like,

[00:26:26] you know,

[00:26:27] Mark Anthony Samuel was in an indie.

[00:26:30] I really liked called hot guys with guns.

[00:26:32] Michael gross,

[00:26:34] Beth Broderick.

[00:26:35] The fact that we get,

[00:26:36] you know,

[00:26:37] the cool rider from Greece too,

[00:26:40] as the,

[00:26:41] the older Mary gentlemen,

[00:26:43] you know,

[00:26:43] it was like,

[00:26:44] okay,

[00:26:44] yes.

[00:26:45] Little Maxwell Caulfield.

[00:26:46] Why not?

[00:26:46] They don't do enough with them.

[00:26:47] Yeah.

[00:26:48] I don't give him anything to play except for I too can take my shirt off,

[00:26:51] but he's there,

[00:26:52] you know,

[00:26:53] that's true.

[00:26:54] Brad,

[00:26:55] before you go,

[00:26:55] I do want to say this.

[00:26:56] I,

[00:26:57] having done decom descendants with you for a solid year,

[00:26:59] you should check that podcast out wherever you listen to podcasts.

[00:27:01] I know you have the ability to dig in and just decide you're not changing

[00:27:05] something.

[00:27:05] Even when everything flies in the face of it as being the thing you need to

[00:27:09] do.

[00:27:10] I think you're going to sit on this one.

[00:27:12] And by the end of the year,

[00:27:13] you're going to,

[00:27:14] you can't possibly tell me it's better than meet me next Christmas.

[00:27:16] I don't think it's better than hot frosty either by a long shot,

[00:27:19] but you had a blast with meet me next Christmas.

[00:27:22] We all did against our better judgment and common sense.

[00:27:27] People were mad at us about that,

[00:27:29] but they weren't mad.

[00:27:29] Like it was qualitatively bad.

[00:27:31] I think they were mad because it didn't,

[00:27:32] it didn't hold it.

[00:27:33] It was nonsensical,

[00:27:34] which it was.

[00:27:35] They were mad that we didn't like hot frosty.

[00:27:37] Yes.

[00:27:37] That's what they were mad about.

[00:27:38] But I think you're going to look back at this.

[00:27:40] It's not going to end up number one on the Netflix board for you.

[00:27:42] I just have to believe that.

[00:27:43] Yeah.

[00:27:44] Whatever you have to believe.

[00:27:45] People are people mad at us.

[00:27:46] People can't believe that all four of us,

[00:27:49] Jacks,

[00:27:50] all four of us basically gave a thumbs up to meet me next Christmas,

[00:27:54] which I didn't do,

[00:27:54] but I was close to doing that.

[00:27:56] And then all four of us basically gave up a tepid,

[00:28:00] meh or thumbs down to hot frosty,

[00:28:01] which I stand by 100% both of them.

[00:28:04] I think we,

[00:28:04] we nailed it on both of them,

[00:28:05] but there's a,

[00:28:06] a solid 40 to 50% of the people out there that think we got it wrong.

[00:28:10] I think they're polarizing.

[00:28:11] I think the movies are polarizing.

[00:28:13] We just got four people on the same,

[00:28:15] you know,

[00:28:15] side of things.

[00:28:16] Sure.

[00:28:17] I,

[00:28:18] I thought we will be doing a Netflix ranking episode at the end of the

[00:28:21] season,

[00:28:21] right?

[00:28:21] Oh,

[00:28:22] we are now after hearing this BS.

[00:28:26] Well,

[00:28:26] I don't want to rile you up again.

[00:28:28] Well,

[00:28:28] should I take that week off if we do it?

[00:28:29] I want to hear it.

[00:28:30] Oh,

[00:28:31] no,

[00:28:31] no,

[00:28:31] we're doing it.

[00:28:31] I want to hear you cement it at the end of this year that this movie was

[00:28:35] better than those other two.

[00:28:36] And look,

[00:28:37] okay,

[00:28:38] just go ahead.

[00:28:39] Um,

[00:28:40] listen,

[00:28:40] I,

[00:28:41] I,

[00:28:41] I really enjoyed the scene where she finds out that she's go,

[00:28:44] uh,

[00:28:45] gets the job offer and she goes out to her parents and the dad initially,

[00:28:50] obviously the parents are just happy that she's home.

[00:28:52] And the initial response of being like,

[00:28:54] I hope you told them where they can shove it.

[00:28:56] And then they read the room and they read how their daughter is reacting to

[00:29:00] this.

[00:29:01] And then they move into the encouragement of being like,

[00:29:05] yeah,

[00:29:05] this,

[00:29:05] if this is the thing,

[00:29:06] if this is your thing,

[00:29:07] then you should go and do it.

[00:29:08] I thought they handled that really well.

[00:29:09] And it felt true because of course,

[00:29:11] as a parent,

[00:29:11] you would love for your kids to always be around.

[00:29:13] But then when you realize that they're really excited about the way that

[00:29:16] they encouraged her,

[00:29:18] I thought was really sweet.

[00:29:19] And it did make me tear up.

[00:29:20] I was in a mood guys.

[00:29:21] I was in a mood.

[00:29:22] That dad,

[00:29:23] I did not think was good.

[00:29:24] Oh,

[00:29:24] I loved them.

[00:29:25] I loved them.

[00:29:26] I thought it was great.

[00:29:27] Dano.

[00:29:28] Uh,

[00:29:28] I mean,

[00:29:29] listen,

[00:29:29] the scene right after that one,

[00:29:31] I don't remember it.

[00:29:32] Just like the rest of this movie.

[00:29:34] I don't have any feels.

[00:29:36] Did you remember the scene that I just said?

[00:29:37] I,

[00:29:37] I didn't.

[00:29:38] I,

[00:29:38] I like,

[00:29:39] I was so put off by the fact that you were in a mood too.

[00:29:42] I was watching this and I,

[00:29:44] I don't know.

[00:29:45] You seem extra cranky about this movie.

[00:29:47] This movie is like,

[00:29:48] are you more mad at this movie or more mad that I love this movie?

[00:29:50] The second,

[00:29:52] the thing is,

[00:29:53] is that I like the first two Netflix movies,

[00:29:56] even hot frosty,

[00:29:57] which isn't great in my opinion,

[00:29:59] are really very good.

[00:29:59] There is something about the Netflix movies that I look forward to.

[00:30:03] Like Hallmark makes 41 of these things,

[00:30:06] 47,

[00:30:06] including Hallmark plus.

[00:30:08] And it's like,

[00:30:08] yeah,

[00:30:09] you're going to get a few five gold rings and you're going to have to sit

[00:30:13] through it.

[00:30:13] And I'm gonna have to take notes and act like I care with Netflix.

[00:30:16] There's six of these,

[00:30:17] there's five of these,

[00:30:18] however many we're recovering.

[00:30:18] And so I,

[00:30:20] after the preview episode,

[00:30:21] these five were kind of like my super bowl of this thing.

[00:30:24] I was very excited about these movies.

[00:30:26] This one wouldn't finish in my top 30 Hallmark move Christmas movies this year.

[00:30:31] So there's that.

[00:30:33] Um,

[00:30:34] let's take a break.

[00:30:35] I'll come back.

[00:30:35] We'll get to the way when the,

[00:30:36] what the Hallmark here on deck,

[00:30:38] the Hallmark.

[00:30:39] I got it guys.

[00:30:42] Deck the Hallmark.

[00:30:48] Hi everybody.

[00:30:49] Welcome back.

[00:30:49] We're talking about the married gentleman Netflix.

[00:30:52] It's time for the wait.

[00:30:53] What is where we talk about?

[00:30:54] What are the two movies?

[00:30:54] Let's go.

[00:30:54] Wait,

[00:30:55] what?

[00:30:55] And I will start with you.

[00:30:57] Jax.

[00:30:59] Three,

[00:31:00] two,

[00:31:00] wait for him.

[00:31:01] I've got two.

[00:31:02] So as,

[00:31:06] um,

[00:31:08] you know,

[00:31:08] as I mentioned earlier,

[00:31:10] I was not super excited to see these men strip.

[00:31:13] However,

[00:31:14] the man that I was looking forward to seeing strip the most was Maxwell Caulfield,

[00:31:19] British actor,

[00:31:20] who I think is quite attractive and he did an amazing job,

[00:31:24] but they weren't,

[00:31:25] he kept his nipples were covered most of the time.

[00:31:29] And I was wondering if that was intentional.

[00:31:32] Uh,

[00:31:32] I don't even know if we can hear this suspender,

[00:31:35] you know,

[00:31:36] so we could go.

[00:31:36] Are we trying like to make this movie more scandalous than it was?

[00:31:40] What?

[00:31:41] I have written,

[00:31:42] I,

[00:31:42] I cannot take off.

[00:31:43] They covered as nipples.

[00:31:45] I'm back spacing mine.

[00:31:46] Like the nipple count,

[00:31:47] obviously low.

[00:31:48] Nipple is all this movie has on the table.

[00:31:50] I mean,

[00:31:51] come on.

[00:31:52] And the gun show.

[00:31:53] Anything else,

[00:31:53] Jax?

[00:31:56] Yes.

[00:31:57] Then of course the other one,

[00:31:58] I was like outraged and,

[00:32:00] and screaming at this.

[00:32:02] The fact that the entire cast of these four married gentlemen are so,

[00:32:10] tender hearted in the most annoying way,

[00:32:14] really self-absorbed instead of tender hearted about her leaving to do her job.

[00:32:18] She's the choreographer.

[00:32:20] Like the choreographer does not stay.

[00:32:23] No.

[00:32:23] And even if that,

[00:32:25] I think the most that would have been realistic was Chad,

[00:32:29] Michael Murray saying to her,

[00:32:31] I'm really bummed that you're leaving.

[00:32:33] I thought we had something and yeah,

[00:32:36] it,

[00:32:36] this sucks.

[00:32:37] But instead it's,

[00:32:38] it's like,

[00:32:39] it's so,

[00:32:40] it is incredibly cringeworthy.

[00:32:42] And I was so angry about it.

[00:32:45] Jax,

[00:32:45] can I ask you this?

[00:32:46] Were you upset that she didn't get back on the plane and go do the job that she loved her whole life?

[00:32:50] And just,

[00:32:51] just decided that she loved this other thing more.

[00:32:57] Okay.

[00:32:58] Okay.

[00:32:58] So yes,

[00:32:59] but I think that I would have liked it more if she would have gone back to the city and decided to do like choreography and other dance,

[00:33:09] because I do think they treated her like absolute crap.

[00:33:12] So I think she belongs in the city.

[00:33:15] I think she's found a new passion for choreography and I hope she'll continue performing.

[00:33:19] So yes,

[00:33:19] I'm upset that she didn't go back to the city,

[00:33:20] but I also kind of wanted her to give it to the jingle bells too.

[00:33:23] Like I wasn't excited.

[00:33:25] yeah,

[00:33:25] of course.

[00:33:26] Got it.

[00:33:26] Yeah.

[00:33:27] Alonzo.

[00:33:28] Yeah.

[00:33:29] The jingle bells,

[00:33:30] I think require some unpacking here because like,

[00:33:33] are they the Rockettes or are they a Christmas ranch?

[00:33:37] Like what is the deal with them?

[00:33:38] Like is a three year contract with them mean three actual years or three?

[00:33:42] Novembers and December.

[00:33:43] It's like,

[00:33:44] what are we talking about?

[00:33:45] How big a deal is this and how much of a job job throughout the year is it?

[00:33:50] And I don't ever,

[00:33:51] I'm never clear on that.

[00:33:53] So that was,

[00:33:54] that's bizarre.

[00:33:55] Um,

[00:33:56] when they're doing the first performance,

[00:33:58] Beth Broderick sticks her head in the dressing room and says,

[00:34:00] doors are open.

[00:34:02] We start in 15 minutes.

[00:34:03] And I'm like,

[00:34:03] well,

[00:34:04] no wonder your bar is losing money.

[00:34:06] That's right.

[00:34:06] The doors open and then you got to wait hours for the show to go on and people drink.

[00:34:11] That's right.

[00:34:12] That's how you make your money.

[00:34:13] Beth Broderick,

[00:34:14] like do better at being running a nightclub.

[00:34:16] Bar owning there.

[00:34:17] Yes.

[00:34:18] Um,

[00:34:20] you do not do a male stripper act that has zero crowd work.

[00:34:28] They should be grinding on those women.

[00:34:32] They should be lap dancing.

[00:34:34] They should be getting twenties shoved in their belt loops.

[00:34:40] That they're all wearing.

[00:34:42] Like they,

[00:34:43] they are on stage.

[00:34:45] Nobody rushes them.

[00:34:46] They come out into the bar afterwards and nobody is like,

[00:34:51] it's all wrong.

[00:34:52] This is all wrong.

[00:34:54] Um,

[00:34:56] and then like they're opening night,

[00:34:58] 12 people show up and they're like,

[00:35:00] wow,

[00:35:00] we haven't made this much money in years.

[00:35:02] I'm like,

[00:35:02] again,

[00:35:03] you are doing bar wrong.

[00:35:05] Yes.

[00:35:05] Cause like nobody is here.

[00:35:07] And,

[00:35:07] and they try and build this up to a phenomenon where we get like,

[00:35:10] Ooh,

[00:35:10] it's sold out.

[00:35:11] It's still not all that crowded.

[00:35:14] Like I want to purge this movie from my mind.

[00:35:17] I,

[00:35:17] I went on the criterion channel last night and watched an early nineties

[00:35:20] indie called the linguine incident with Rosanna Arquette and David Bowie.

[00:35:25] And that one,

[00:35:26] there's a restaurant that becomes crowded and dang it.

[00:35:29] There's a crowd there.

[00:35:30] Yeah.

[00:35:31] Yeah.

[00:35:31] That's the most Alonzo thing I've ever heard in my life to,

[00:35:35] to be,

[00:35:36] to rid his mind and memory of the Mary gentlemen.

[00:35:39] He went to the criteria.

[00:35:40] He went to the criterion.

[00:35:41] As you do.

[00:35:42] Yeah.

[00:35:42] I was so mad.

[00:35:43] I was so mad at this movie.

[00:35:44] Okay.

[00:35:45] She's unpacking ingredients,

[00:35:47] stuff out of the grocery bag so that she and mom can make a bouche in a

[00:35:50] well.

[00:35:50] And one of the things she pulls out has like a bow wrapped on it.

[00:35:54] And I'm like,

[00:35:54] you bought that at the grocery store.

[00:35:57] What is that?

[00:35:58] Like what ingredient do you purchase at the Sycamore Falls grocery store that

[00:36:03] has a giant ribbon tied to it?

[00:36:06] You don't go around your local grocery store and just put ribbons around

[00:36:09] groceries during the holiday season.

[00:36:11] You know,

[00:36:12] someone should.

[00:36:13] But I think they should start.

[00:36:15] For peace.

[00:36:16] For peace.

[00:36:17] That's how you save money.

[00:36:18] That's right.

[00:36:18] No inflation there.

[00:36:20] I can't speak to this directly,

[00:36:21] but Dave was very objecting to their bouche de Noël craft in terms of like,

[00:36:26] when they're like rolling it up and everything.

[00:36:28] He was like,

[00:36:28] Nope.

[00:36:29] Wrong.

[00:36:30] I don't know what is right,

[00:36:31] but I didn't look right.

[00:36:33] Yeah.

[00:36:33] He,

[00:36:33] he,

[00:36:34] he,

[00:36:34] he could tell you from experience that they,

[00:36:35] they,

[00:36:35] they totally muffed that up.

[00:36:37] And then,

[00:36:38] okay.

[00:36:39] Whether or not she goes back to the city,

[00:36:42] the movie doesn't even give her the agency to be like,

[00:36:46] you know what?

[00:36:46] I'm not going.

[00:36:48] She's in a traffic jam on the way to the airport.

[00:36:50] And then the next thing we know,

[00:36:51] she's back at the club.

[00:36:52] Did she really decide not to go back in town or to town?

[00:36:56] Or did she just miss her flight and go,

[00:36:57] eh,

[00:36:58] I'm going to go back and say all the right things.

[00:37:00] Yeah.

[00:37:00] It was more,

[00:37:01] it was more of a convenience to be in that place to be was the blooper reel.

[00:37:05] They were just trying to get to the blooper reel however they could.

[00:37:09] I mean,

[00:37:09] there is such a rush of this movie.

[00:37:11] Like a,

[00:37:12] she and Chad,

[00:37:12] Michael Murray,

[00:37:13] Murray barely have time to like create a relationship.

[00:37:16] But yeah,

[00:37:17] that whole ending is like,

[00:37:18] did you really decide that you weren't going to go back?

[00:37:21] Or did you just sort of throw your hands in the air because the Christmas

[00:37:24] Eve,

[00:37:25] the airport was so backed up,

[00:37:26] which by the way,

[00:37:27] pro tip,

[00:37:28] it's not December 23rd.

[00:37:30] Yeah.

[00:37:30] It was a terrible day to travel.

[00:37:31] The 24th is wide open.

[00:37:33] Yeah.

[00:37:34] I,

[00:37:34] nothing makes a guy get butterflies in his tummy.

[00:37:38] Like someone saying this was just more convenient.

[00:37:41] The traffic was a bummer.

[00:37:44] Yeah.

[00:37:45] You're more convenient.

[00:37:46] I went by option B.

[00:37:47] I chose to stay because I really didn't have another choice.

[00:37:49] Honestly,

[00:37:50] I literally couldn't make it to the airport.

[00:37:52] I tried.

[00:37:53] I tried.

[00:37:55] I just wouldn't let me.

[00:37:57] Not letting her finish the season,

[00:37:59] and not only seems really mean,

[00:38:02] but also really ill-advised,

[00:38:04] right?

[00:38:05] Like she's been like,

[00:38:06] she's the focal point of the jingle bells.

[00:38:09] There's three weeks left in the season.

[00:38:11] And for them to be like,

[00:38:11] you're out now,

[00:38:13] we got to get her.

[00:38:14] That's no wonder it didn't work out.

[00:38:16] You,

[00:38:16] you were setting that,

[00:38:17] that,

[00:38:17] that,

[00:38:18] uh,

[00:38:18] that other dancer up for,

[00:38:20] uh,

[00:38:20] for failure to,

[00:38:21] to throw her in there.

[00:38:22] And of course it didn't work.

[00:38:23] I would assume they brought one of the current dancers into her spot.

[00:38:27] And then this new dancer,

[00:38:27] what happened to her?

[00:38:29] And she says,

[00:38:30] showbiz isn't for everybody.

[00:38:31] Wow.

[00:38:32] I just assumed that they didn't put her in that center spot,

[00:38:35] but I don't know.

[00:38:35] You would hope.

[00:38:36] And then her under city got flu Rona.

[00:38:39] Is that the one they said?

[00:38:40] Flu Rona.

[00:38:40] Flu Rona.

[00:38:40] That's what they said.

[00:38:41] Flu Rona.

[00:38:42] Classic Flu Rona.

[00:38:43] Yeah.

[00:38:43] Flu Rona.

[00:38:44] Hate that.

[00:38:45] Um,

[00:38:45] you know,

[00:38:46] I,

[00:38:47] maybe it's just cause I've had my Christmas decoration since,

[00:38:50] it's up since November 1st,

[00:38:52] but a little late to be putting Christmas decorations up on the town

[00:38:55] lamppost.

[00:38:56] Right.

[00:38:56] She gets sent home right around Thanksgiving.

[00:38:58] Does it?

[00:38:59] The first week of it.

[00:39:00] No,

[00:39:00] it says,

[00:39:00] it says December 3rd,

[00:39:02] 4th on the marquee.

[00:39:03] It's late.

[00:39:03] Isn't it Alonzo?

[00:39:05] Uh,

[00:39:05] I,

[00:39:05] I think for a,

[00:39:07] yeah,

[00:39:07] for a public venue.

[00:39:09] Yeah.

[00:39:09] That's right.

[00:39:11] That's right.

[00:39:11] Good.

[00:39:12] Can you imagine?

[00:39:13] Great.

[00:39:13] We don't have to worry about that in Greenville.

[00:39:15] Greenville,

[00:39:15] you drive around and it's always Christmasy.

[00:39:17] And that's why I appreciate it.

[00:39:19] Unless it's like a hundred.

[00:39:20] To your point,

[00:39:24] Alonzo,

[00:39:24] about not knowing what the jingle bells are.

[00:39:27] The most confusing part of this to me was when she gets to call and

[00:39:32] she's like,

[00:39:33] this is interesting.

[00:39:34] And then when she finds out that she has to hop on the,

[00:39:37] the next plane for the Christmas Eve,

[00:39:41] she's like,

[00:39:42] I didn't know it would be so soon.

[00:39:45] You're the,

[00:39:45] it's the jingle.

[00:39:46] You're the jingle bells.

[00:39:47] It's December 23rd.

[00:39:49] That's why we're here.

[00:39:50] Christmas is kind of a big deal.

[00:39:51] It's like,

[00:39:51] this,

[00:39:52] this is it.

[00:39:52] You're the jingle bells.

[00:39:54] How many more performances do they have for the season?

[00:39:56] That's one of mine.

[00:39:57] If that's your last one,

[00:39:58] which is,

[00:39:59] do they,

[00:40:00] thanks for the tag.

[00:40:01] Do they,

[00:40:02] Jack's is the,

[00:40:03] are there a bunch of Broadway shows on Christmas day or the Rockettes?

[00:40:07] Do they perform on Christmas day?

[00:40:08] I honestly don't know.

[00:40:12] I think the Rockettes perform on Christmas day and I don't think other shows usually do.

[00:40:17] So what about elf?

[00:40:18] The musical?

[00:40:18] They,

[00:40:19] it's a good question.

[00:40:19] Hold out,

[00:40:20] man.

[00:40:21] I got,

[00:40:21] I hope they make it sound like she's got to get back for what amounts to one performance.

[00:40:28] Like the whole thing is going to change after Christmas day.

[00:40:31] And are they going to have one on Christmas day?

[00:40:35] Looks like they do have shows on the Rockettes have shows on Christmas.

[00:40:38] They have the same number.

[00:40:39] They always do.

[00:40:40] You would think that it would be less if they're going to.

[00:40:43] So like,

[00:40:44] it's weird that they're rushing her back for one day of performances.

[00:40:48] And,

[00:40:49] and this is such a big deal.

[00:40:50] And,

[00:40:50] and simultaneously that she's surprised.

[00:40:53] Yes.

[00:40:53] Like you're the jingle bells.

[00:40:55] That is the thing that you do.

[00:40:56] We need someone.

[00:40:58] Did she think she was talking about next?

[00:40:59] That,

[00:41:00] that's what makes me feel like it must,

[00:41:02] they must,

[00:41:02] this is the jingle bell show,

[00:41:05] but the,

[00:41:05] they have the,

[00:41:07] the crew dances different shows.

[00:41:09] That would be my guess.

[00:41:11] Then there are the Easter bells or something.

[00:41:13] I don't know what it is.

[00:41:15] The flag day bells.

[00:41:17] Uh,

[00:41:17] Arbor day bells.

[00:41:18] Great bell.

[00:41:19] And this is why we named our show deck,

[00:41:21] the hallmark,

[00:41:22] because it makes the rest of the year,

[00:41:23] not confusing at all for anybody,

[00:41:25] especially with the freaking snow globe in the background.

[00:41:28] People never ask us,

[00:41:29] what do you do the rest of the year?

[00:41:31] Never,

[00:41:31] never happens.

[00:41:32] Is it like their Christmas movies all year long?

[00:41:34] Uh,

[00:41:34] yeah.

[00:41:35] So Alonzo did start to dive into this bar and how terribly it's run.

[00:41:39] And the fact that there are,

[00:41:40] what Alonzo said was a dozen people at this first performance.

[00:41:44] And there are a dozen people.

[00:41:46] If you count the employees,

[00:41:47] uh,

[00:41:49] there are maybe seven women there.

[00:41:51] And here's the thing is those seven women are there for every show.

[00:41:56] They're there for every show.

[00:41:59] And then $30.

[00:42:01] And then $30 every night.

[00:42:03] So thank you.

[00:42:04] You add maybe for the rest of the shows,

[00:42:06] it starts to get crowded.

[00:42:07] Maybe seven or eight more people.

[00:42:08] You got about 15 people paying 30 bucks a pop,

[00:42:12] right?

[00:42:12] So you're out for this $450 before you pay anyone,

[00:42:16] assuming everyone's doing it for free.

[00:42:18] It's going to take you 60 shows to get the 30 grand at 500 bucks a night.

[00:42:23] You,

[00:42:23] you like,

[00:42:24] that's without,

[00:42:24] that's not covering any of your expenses and you're not letting people in early to drink.

[00:42:30] It just,

[00:42:31] the math isn't mathing here.

[00:42:33] This,

[00:42:33] this,

[00:42:34] uh,

[00:42:35] pants stay on all male review for seven women that show up every night.

[00:42:39] Isn't going to save the bar.

[00:42:41] And may I remind you that all of that money just gets them to sea level.

[00:42:47] That doesn't actually say,

[00:42:49] you know,

[00:42:50] save the town.

[00:42:50] What about January?

[00:42:51] Yeah.

[00:42:52] When it just like,

[00:42:53] what are you doing in January?

[00:42:54] Where married gentlemen aren't performing every night in January.

[00:42:57] You're not going to show like it just,

[00:42:59] the movie doesn't bother to care about anything that it's doing.

[00:43:04] And it's unbelievable.

[00:43:06] There is a scene that is pretty well done where Brit Roberson teaches

[00:43:10] child,

[00:43:11] Michael Murray,

[00:43:12] how to slow dance,

[00:43:13] or at least like,

[00:43:14] this is a hold.

[00:43:15] This is a blah,

[00:43:15] blah,

[00:43:16] blah,

[00:43:16] but she's doing it like it's practice.

[00:43:19] And it's,

[00:43:19] she is teaching him dance numbers that aren't anywhere in the performance,

[00:43:23] like in no time would that show up in the performance.

[00:43:26] What she's teaching him has no bearing on what he has to do.

[00:43:30] So for that reason,

[00:43:31] kind of worthless,

[00:43:32] even though they do have good chemistry in that scene.

[00:43:34] And then lastly,

[00:43:36] you know,

[00:43:36] as we do with all good leading dudes in these movies,

[00:43:38] she finds out that he's,

[00:43:39] you know,

[00:43:40] got a passion like in his is wood carving.

[00:43:42] And she shows up at this barn and he takes this sheet,

[00:43:45] take the sheet off that door.

[00:43:46] You'll get that in a few weeks.

[00:43:47] Uh,

[00:43:48] she,

[00:43:48] uh,

[00:43:49] yeah,

[00:43:50] she,

[00:43:51] uh,

[00:43:51] takes the sheet off this wood carving that she's,

[00:43:54] he's done.

[00:43:54] And she's like,

[00:43:55] it's incredible.

[00:43:56] And it is not incredible.

[00:43:59] It is like someone is learning how to car.

[00:44:03] Like it is like cookie cutter wood carving.

[00:44:07] It's like the Paul Mitchell school of wood carving.

[00:44:09] It's like,

[00:44:10] it's not good wood carving.

[00:44:12] It just is passable.

[00:44:15] Maybe wood carving.

[00:44:17] Uh,

[00:44:17] yeah.

[00:44:18] Everything else you say to a wood carving person who looks like Chad Michael Murray when they take their shirt off.

[00:44:22] That's right.

[00:44:23] Yeah,

[00:44:23] exactly.

[00:44:24] There you go.

[00:44:24] Now you got it.

[00:44:25] Uh,

[00:44:25] it's time for what the hallmark is where we wonder what could have been,

[00:44:27] maybe happened,

[00:44:28] get some clarity to any questions that we still have.

[00:44:30] What are we still wondering about?

[00:44:31] That's what we're talking about.

[00:44:32] Jax,

[00:44:33] any questions that you would like answers to?

[00:44:36] Three,

[00:44:37] two,

[00:44:38] yes.

[00:44:38] And I think that the four of us can answer them in the movie that we are.

[00:44:44] I know you guys already have a Christmas movie in the works,

[00:44:46] but listen,

[00:44:47] listen to this.

[00:44:48] Okay.

[00:44:48] So the Rockettes make between 36,000 and $39,000 a year because they only work during that season.

[00:44:55] But their benefits,

[00:44:57] like their health insurance is for the whole year for those two months,

[00:44:59] but their health insurance covers the whole year,

[00:45:01] but they need things to supplement their income.

[00:45:03] Yeah.

[00:45:04] So I would really like if they would do some exotic dancing.

[00:45:09] So here's the three titles that I present to you and we can see which ones we like the best.

[00:45:14] And should I get the B button ready?

[00:45:16] Or are you going to be good to go?

[00:45:18] You tried to interrupt her on a three second delay.

[00:45:20] That's on you.

[00:45:21] It was a good bit,

[00:45:21] but still.

[00:45:22] My bad.

[00:45:23] My bad.

[00:45:25] And it's my fault.

[00:45:29] It isn't.

[00:45:29] You're on delay.

[00:45:30] Okay.

[00:45:30] So it's how many peppermint mochas?

[00:45:35] Two peppermint mochas.

[00:45:36] One peppermint mochas.

[00:45:42] Okay.

[00:45:42] Go ahead.

[00:45:43] Give us the titles.

[00:45:43] Give us the titles.

[00:45:46] So,

[00:45:46] okay.

[00:45:47] Okay.

[00:45:47] So here,

[00:45:48] are we calling it kicks,

[00:45:50] curves,

[00:45:50] and Christmas rockettes under wraps or burlesque bells?

[00:45:55] And I,

[00:45:55] now I'll finally get,

[00:45:56] look,

[00:45:57] this is a good story.

[00:45:58] You guys have like,

[00:45:59] what are the Rockettes going to do in the off season?

[00:46:03] They're going to,

[00:46:04] they're going to do some exotic dancing.

[00:46:05] Yeah.

[00:46:06] I mean,

[00:46:06] I will say there's no two people more fit to write this story than us.

[00:46:11] We are experts in the field.

[00:46:12] And I think we've showcased that today.

[00:46:14] Yeah.

[00:46:15] No question about it.

[00:46:16] I know those are all really good.

[00:46:17] I like the kicks,

[00:46:18] curves,

[00:46:18] and whatever.

[00:46:18] I like Rockettes under wraps.

[00:46:20] Okay.

[00:46:20] There's got to be something with.

[00:46:21] There's too many under wrap movies though,

[00:46:23] you know?

[00:46:23] Yeah.

[00:46:24] I just feel like it might get lost in the weeds.

[00:46:26] Unwrapping.

[00:46:26] How many under wraps movies do you?

[00:46:28] I don't know.

[00:46:28] You're right.

[00:46:29] Well,

[00:46:29] there was Christmas under wraps,

[00:46:30] which the guy who directed this thing made.

[00:46:32] Well,

[00:46:33] there you go.

[00:46:33] There you have it.

[00:46:34] It all connects.

[00:46:36] Is that a mixture under wraps?

[00:46:37] Maybe.

[00:46:39] Burlesque Ives.

[00:46:40] Oh,

[00:46:41] that's funny.

[00:46:43] What about line ladies dancing,

[00:46:45] and it's a line dancing movie in the off season?

[00:46:48] Shut up.

[00:46:50] I am into that.

[00:46:52] Line ladies dancing.

[00:46:54] Okay,

[00:46:54] guys.

[00:46:55] Yes.

[00:46:55] See,

[00:46:56] we are the right people.

[00:46:57] We get it.

[00:46:59] We workshopped it.

[00:47:01] Alonzo?

[00:47:02] Yeah,

[00:47:03] I was going to piggy piggyback on what Daniel was saying,

[00:47:06] and that the math is completely ridiculous.

[00:47:07] It's like the first night she's putting up like Santa with like $3,500 or something.

[00:47:13] I'm like,

[00:47:13] wow.

[00:47:13] We started calculating.

[00:47:14] Yes,

[00:47:15] the 10 women at $30.

[00:47:17] Like it was,

[00:47:18] whatever the number she puts on the board is like more than double what could,

[00:47:23] they could have logically made with as few cocktails as they served.

[00:47:26] And even the $30.

[00:47:27] No way.

[00:47:27] For the handful who showed up.

[00:47:28] And I just thought,

[00:47:29] look,

[00:47:30] if they really want to make money fast,

[00:47:32] like A,

[00:47:33] like please pants off,

[00:47:35] see you play.

[00:47:36] Somebody told this movie,

[00:47:37] keep your pants on.

[00:47:38] And they took it out.

[00:47:41] Or B,

[00:47:42] like have a gentleman's night.

[00:47:43] You know,

[00:47:44] I think you'd get better tips.

[00:47:47] I have a question.

[00:47:48] Alonzo,

[00:47:49] you were really passionate about how this movie got it wrong.

[00:47:52] So you might be able to answer what,

[00:47:55] like,

[00:47:56] so they're charging $30.

[00:47:58] Yes.

[00:47:59] Yeah.

[00:47:59] For at best,

[00:48:01] a one minute dance.

[00:48:02] It is.

[00:48:02] Yeah.

[00:48:03] Do they traditionally at establishments like this,

[00:48:07] where they have like dances took her mom to see a show.

[00:48:11] Yes.

[00:48:11] So both of you might be able to answer last.

[00:48:13] Do they do multiple dances throughout the night?

[00:48:15] Do they do like,

[00:48:16] or is it,

[00:48:17] Hey,

[00:48:17] we're come to Alonzo.

[00:48:19] What Alonzo's point was,

[00:48:20] was you come,

[00:48:21] you drink for a while and then an hour,

[00:48:23] hour and a half in,

[00:48:24] and then the dance happens.

[00:48:25] And then like,

[00:48:26] what it's gotta be longer than that.

[00:48:27] This was,

[00:48:28] there's costume changes.

[00:48:30] This event was unconscionably long.

[00:48:32] It was four hours.

[00:48:33] Holy moly.

[00:48:34] And they danced the whole time.

[00:48:36] Wow.

[00:48:37] Yeah.

[00:48:38] And there was,

[00:48:39] as you point out,

[00:48:40] Alonzo,

[00:48:41] very astutely,

[00:48:42] there was lots of crowd work.

[00:48:44] They brought women up on stage.

[00:48:45] They straddled them.

[00:48:46] They came into the audience.

[00:48:47] They rubbed them down.

[00:48:47] As I mentioned before,

[00:48:49] and poor Dan had to hear that story.

[00:48:50] I think five times now,

[00:48:52] it's a bunch of times for that story about your mother getting rubbed down.

[00:48:55] Look,

[00:48:56] if you've seen either of the Magic Mike movies,

[00:48:59] you have some clue as to how this kind of thing proceeds.

[00:49:02] And this movie doesn't do any of that stuff.

[00:49:04] Yeah.

[00:49:05] Yeah.

[00:49:06] I mean,

[00:49:06] that to that point,

[00:49:07] I did do that one,

[00:49:08] yo,

[00:49:08] gavel gavel about the exotic dancing.

[00:49:10] That's right.

[00:49:11] I am an expert,

[00:49:13] but thank you all so much for,

[00:49:14] yeah,

[00:49:14] I was just like,

[00:49:15] that's it.

[00:49:16] Like if I paid $30,

[00:49:18] I,

[00:49:18] even I,

[00:49:20] who enjoyed it would be like,

[00:49:22] I gave it for me.

[00:49:23] That's it.

[00:49:23] That's all we need here.

[00:49:25] Yeah.

[00:49:25] $30.

[00:49:26] And they're going to come every night.

[00:49:28] How sad is your life?

[00:49:30] Yeah.

[00:49:30] That every night you're paying $30 for a one minute dance.

[00:49:35] And they keep their pants on.

[00:49:38] Dan.

[00:49:39] Yeah.

[00:49:40] I mean,

[00:49:40] I alluded to it earlier,

[00:49:41] but what are they going to do all year?

[00:49:42] What's the plan all year for the bar,

[00:49:44] for the Mary gentlemen,

[00:49:45] for Britt Robertson's character.

[00:49:47] She has to make a living.

[00:49:48] Jingle bells,

[00:49:49] anybody.

[00:49:49] She has to make a living and she's now moving in with her parents.

[00:49:54] I would assume.

[00:49:55] And they are just now getting out from being underwater.

[00:49:57] They have a dance team that did that through Christmas review style,

[00:50:05] half naked.

[00:50:06] I don't know.

[00:50:07] I don't know what the plan is.

[00:50:09] January to October,

[00:50:10] save for Christmas in July.

[00:50:12] What's the plan?

[00:50:13] I just,

[00:50:14] like any sort of inkling that this was a good idea to stay home and not go to

[00:50:18] the city would love to hear.

[00:50:20] Cause I thought she needed to be in the city and that was very clear.

[00:50:23] And they didn't give her,

[00:50:25] they didn't give her much agency all movie,

[00:50:27] even in like how this whole thing plays out.

[00:50:30] It's wild.

[00:50:30] And I thought that was kind of the,

[00:50:32] you know,

[00:50:33] the cherry on top.

[00:50:34] It's a Christmas bar.

[00:50:36] I will say,

[00:50:37] it's just hard for me to imagine our boys ever leaving home.

[00:50:40] Cause we're so fun.

[00:50:41] Yeah.

[00:50:41] So I get it.

[00:50:42] Like if my boys were gone for a while and they came back and they hung out with us,

[00:50:45] they'd be like,

[00:50:46] I'm never leaving again.

[00:50:47] This is fun time.

[00:50:48] So it's fun.

[00:50:48] Dad.

[00:50:48] Yes.

[00:50:49] I get it.

[00:50:50] I get it.

[00:50:51] Uh,

[00:50:52] what we did,

[00:50:52] everybody.

[00:50:53] Congratulations to us.

[00:50:54] Be sure to tune into philo,

[00:50:55] philo.tv slash DTH.

[00:50:57] If you want to,

[00:50:57] if you're listening to this episode,

[00:50:58] you want to enjoy it through an entirely different lens.

[00:51:01] Philo.tv slash DTH.

[00:51:03] So much to see.

[00:51:04] So much to see.

[00:51:05] That's exactly right.

[00:51:06] Um,

[00:51:07] we will,

[00:51:07] this crew will not be back next week.

[00:51:09] We got a lot of,

[00:51:11] uh,

[00:51:11] Hallmark movies to get to,

[00:51:12] but we will be back in a couple of weeks.

[00:51:13] Uh,

[00:51:14] and the low honesans will be in full force.

[00:51:17] That's right.

[00:51:17] Until then,

[00:51:18] may we be the first to wish you a Merry Christmas.

[00:51:21] Deck the Hallmarks of Brave Will Jam podcast is produced by Aaron

[00:51:24] and Shay.

[00:51:25] For more information on deck,

[00:51:26] the Hallmark,

[00:51:27] you can go to deck,

[00:51:27] the Hallmark.com for more information on the deck,

[00:51:29] the Hallmark family.

[00:51:30] You can go to Bramble jam plus.com deck.

[00:51:32] The Hallmark is presented by philo TV for a free trial of philo.

[00:51:36] Go to philo.tv slash DTH.

[00:51:46] You're about to hear some ads that help keep the lights on here in the old

[00:51:50] studio.

[00:51:52] Thanks for listening or don't listen.

[00:51:54] It's really up to you at this point.

[00:51:57] It's at the end of the show.

[00:51:58] I mean,

[00:51:58] you're listening to me.

[00:52:00] Hi.

[00:52:00] But here they come.

[00:52:01] I promise they're coming.

[00:52:02] Yep.

[00:52:03] Here they are.

[00:52:04] Happy day.