The Way Home - S04E02 - Blinded by the Light

[00:00:03] This is a Bramble Jam Podcast Hi, I'm Brian I love the way home. Hi, I'm John and Girls Gone Hallmark love the way home. I'm Dan and Girls Gone Hallmark do love the way home and that's good for you to know. And this is the Deck The Hallmark Podcast. Deck The Hallmark, it's this podcast. Friends host this podcast.

[00:00:31] We hope you like this jolly podcast. Hi everybody! Oh boy, oh boy. Big fans of it out there. And we think that's great. I bet you there's other podcasts that love it too, but we know it's documented that the Girls Gone Hallmark love the way home. And we love them. Megan and Wendy are crushing it. I'm excited to be here today.

[00:00:59] I'm excited to be doing this because after this I get to eat my lunch. Oh wow, you haven't done that yet. Well, I didn't have time. Yeah. So... I'm sorry bud. I'm excited to be here though. Yeah, what's good? Eat my lunch yet? Do you eat your lunch yet? No, I don't know actually what I'm going to do. I've not eat lunch yet either. So we're all in this together. I had a protein bar. Uh-huh. Yeah. What could go wrong with us reviewing episode two season four of the way home on empty stomachs? Yeah. It's going to get our best. Yeah.

[00:01:27] It was great to be here once again. Ryguy, tell everybody about the thing that you were telling me before this we started recording. Uh, I wanted to, I wanted, I asked you, we were reviewing, uh, a guardians of the galaxy too. And I asked you if I could curse and you said, no, you said it depends. What would have been the scenario where I could have? I want to know what you wanted to say, but I was going to say, I thought it would be funny.

[00:01:57] Just like just censor yourself, but yeah, I will. I don't want people to think that I craft these spontaneous moments ahead of time, right? And I don't know, you don't do that, but I thought it could have been funny if brand was like, I'll be brain here for a second. All right, Ryan, it's time for the hot take. What'd you think of guardians? Do me do me. Yeah. All right. All right, Ryan, you're a hard guy to impersonate. Uh, you have like a Southern draw, but just barely, you know, like, uh, all right, Ryan, what'd you think of guardians of the galaxy volume two?

[00:02:26] And then he would have kicked it to me and I would have gone. Yeah. Brand, this movie was horse bleep. And I thought I could have gotten Dan to laugh. I thought like, you know, but if you would have done that immediately, you'd have gotten me. Yeah. And, but I, I know you'd have to definitely had to bleep it. No, I would have been better bleeped even the depends was on the words. Yeah. But that would have been fine. I get it now. It's all coming together. Yeah.

[00:02:52] I think typically we've never said, we've never said that bleep on the show before. No, no. I will. We'll let some, some, uh, some H's and D's. Derrieres. Yeah. Um, you know, when we have to, I appreciate it. You saved me a little bit of time and we had a nice thing to talk about here. So that's really fun today. We are talking about the way home. Speaking of. Speaking of H's. Season four, episode two. It is, uh, it's called blinded by the light. Blinded by the light. Oh, they're going to the eighties.

[00:03:21] It's like, uh, we'll talk about, they don't pay attention to dates on the show. The way home season for episode two. Are we ready to dive into the pond? Here we go. I'm diving in. There you go. Um, and, uh, what it was at the Sunday, April 20, 27th, 26, 26, 26. Blinded by the light is in the seventies. So maybe it could have been there. Yeah. It could have been there. They nailed it. Yeah. Uh, and it went a little something like this. Uh, all right.

[00:03:50] Elliot is all sad. Uh, the pond didn't take him. Dell is going to help him through it. We see a flashback of, uh, uh, teenage Elliot leaving the house. Dell and Colton are, uh, telling him that he's always welcome to stay. And as he walks away, Dell is like, we never should have let him leave. It's not what Tesla would have wanted. And Colton said, all we promise is that we would keep loving him. That's our promise. That's what we're going to do. Cat comes out of the pond in 1925.

[00:04:17] Fern says, I guess I, uh, shouldn't, uh, know when you are from, but I can ask why. Cat says that she's looking for Tessa, Tessa Augustine. And, uh, she says, I do know some Augustines, but no Tessa. She asks cat her name and Fern says, I'll just call you kitty cat. Fern has the same conversation with Alice in 1976.

[00:04:43] Fern says that she hasn't seen anyone matching the description of Tessa. She takes Alice to the house and Alice is like, why am I here? Fern is like, I have no idea why you're here, but it is time for my nap. Now that's the Fern that I remember. Uh, in the twenties, Fern says that she's never time traveled. She has no interest in heading back in time. She's a modern girl. She only cares about the future. In fact, that's is the, uh, first.

[00:05:12] In fact, this is the first time she's ever come across a time traveler. She's very excited about this. Alice is walking down the streets and Evelyn drives up. She's excited to see cat again. Fern and cat also walk down the street and Fern gets a couple of Augustine boys to stop their car to pick them up. She asks them about Tessa and they're like, both like, we have no idea who you're talking about. Alice gets to coils and Jasper, uh, gives her a welcome back milkshake. She asks if he knows a Tessa. He's like, sure.

[00:05:41] Back in the present, Elliot is looking at the pictures of him and his mom. The clock suddenly starts playing a song when Dell shows up to check on him. She asks him to come with her. Alice is looking at a book of songs that were made in the area and comes across one from 1926. She picks up a guitar and starts playing it right then and there. Fern brings cat to the newspaper where she's living and invites cat to, uh, get together for the evening.

[00:06:10] Maybe Tessa will be there. Dell and Elliot fix something in the barn and she asks, uh, and he asks her and he tells her, sorry, he tells her that he got his five more minutes with Colton right there at the barn. It meant a lot to him. Dell asks Elliot if cat and him are still going to get married since she's time traveling. And he says, nothing can stop me from marrying that woman. Uh, back in the twenties, Fern and cat are starting, uh, are getting changed for the party. When Dan Janot walks in.

[00:06:39] Hey Dan, what are you doing? Uh, his name is Cliff and he's like, Oh, I'm just looking for the editor of this year paper. He and, uh, Fern have some flirty, flirty fun time. Um, and then she and cat head to the party at the Lingermore estate to place where prohibition doesn't exist. Uh, Grayson is there pulling all the strings and even has Phantom of the Opera playing at the party before it ever went anywhere else. What a guy.

[00:07:06] Uh, Colton shows up, uh, in the, uh, seventies and excited to see Alice. Where you been pal? Uh, Evelyn takes them to see her new husband, Ash. Grayson tells the party that, uh, cat is that, that he's going to film a movie right there in Port Haven. And Fern is going to be the star of the movie. It's going to be Cassandra in the lighthouse. It's going to be a beautiful story. She introduces Grayson to cat. Ash is waxing poetic, uh, about poetry, uh, ironically.

[00:07:36] And Evelyn is hanging on every word. He's a big traveler, uh, not time traveler, but traveler. And doesn't understand why anybody would want to stay in Port Haven for very long. He and Colton get into a little bit of an argument and Evan is like, okay, enough of that. Let's go to the mines. To the mines. We're going to explore the tunnels. Uh, while Fern is singing a song, cat sees Grayson talking to the Augustine boys and they hand him. So what seems to be like a wad of cash that he puts in his pocket.

[00:08:04] Then he comes downstairs and proposes to Fern. She says, yes, the gang in the seventies is in the tunnels. While down there, they find an old pair of glasses and Alice finds a bullet shell. Cat warns Fern that Grayson might not be on the up and up because the Augustine brothers paid him for something. Fern is like, I'm sure it's nothing. Elliot and Dell are at a bar and we find out that Jacob is, uh, took a job at a bar in Toronto. This causes Dell to drink a lot because she's sad.

[00:08:34] In the twenties, the prohibition officers show up. They, uh, so they quickly ditch their drinks and run. Colton can't handle this Ash guy in the seventies and goes to leave. Evelyn is hurt by this and runs to the study. Alice goes to check on her and she tells Alice that she is pregnant. It's Ash's baby. On the way back home from the party, Cliff stops cat and Fern. He says, uh, well, you know what?

[00:09:03] Uh, I could, uh, find you. I'm a officer of the law. I could find you for this alcohol. And Fern is like, cat doesn't have any money because she's a time traveler. He laughs and sends them on their way. That's a new one. Uh, Alice finds Colton and sings him a song and show that she's been working on. And Colton's like, it's a nice song, but it wasn't from your hearts. And Alice says that she's afraid to bear her soul in a song. Cat and Fern end up at the pond.

[00:09:30] Fern says, I think the pond brought you here to give you one heck of a good time. She asks her to keep her ear to the ground for a Tessa Augustine. Or there's a chance it could have been, uh, her, she could have been using her maiden name, Tessa Cooper. And, uh, when she, when cat jumps in, we see Fern's face suddenly changed now that she has that information. Um, all right. So cat comes back, tells Dell about her time travel and her time with Fern.

[00:09:58] Dell says that none of that matches what I know about Fern. The stuff that she had told Dell is straight out of the movie that she's going to be in. So it seems like she told Dell the plot of the movie was the plot of her real life. The episode ends with Dell showing Elliot a picture, uh, that she had that was ripped and says it, it includes his mom and says that she made a pack with Tessa, but some packs have a shelf life. And that's when we see Alice and Colton back in the seventies,

[00:10:26] finishing their hangout session with a motorbike drives by fast. They follow it. And when they get to the house, he says, that's my brother. And now my friends was the way home season four episode two. Blinded by the light. We did it. I am Groot. I am Groot. We're going to take a break. We're going to come back. You did that justice too. You didn't take any shortcuts. That was extensive. Really good job. Thanks. Um, we're going to take a break. We're going to come back. We're going to not sarcastic. That was really good.

[00:10:56] I agree. I'm sure I missed stuff and got stuff right. I think I was not doing a bit. No, I'm sure I did. It was amazing. Sure. I did. Uh, all right, let's take a break. We'll come back. We will get to this episode. Break it down here on. Deck the Hallmark. Imagine how good that synopsis would have been if I had lunch or bad. Maybe it would have slowed me down. I don't know. You were, that was as incredibly detailed for an episode.

[00:11:25] Like maybe it's, I don't want to give my hot takeaway. Maybe it's because I had forgotten some of that stuff. Maybe that was it. That's why we do this. That's why we do this. But you were on it. It's possible that you were locked in. Thank you. Yeah. Uh, it is time for the hot take. It's where we share exactly how we felt about this episode. I'll start with you. Right guy. Right guy. Episode two, season four. Got a great opportunity here. Good time. We're a bit of a snore. Wow. Bren, that was beautiful. Thank you.

[00:11:56] Again, I haven't eaten this. I have not had lunch. Yeah. Maybe this episode, this episode is completely fine. It's largely coherent, um, plays up the threads of last week. I would also say it's decently, uh, per dance point forgettable. Um, and it's still nearly impossible for me to buy into the stakes of what the season is asking me to do. I'm not really here to talk about this week's episode though.

[00:12:21] I, I, I like I, uh, a lot has happened in the last week since we have done this. And what Dan says at the end of every episode is not rubbish. Uh, the, the double deckers, uh, the Facebook group is really the best corner of the internet. And unlike in previous jobs I've had in media, I very much look forward to reading the comments and everything after the fact here, because it's a relative safe space and I know things aren't going to get too kooky. So I've interacted with a lot of thoughts in the last week and I've literally interacted with a lot of commenters.

[00:12:50] And I feel like there's a couple of things that I want to touch on. First of which that is ultimately, if you're still loving the show, I mean, what I said last week, I want you to love it. And we're in a tough spot here. We're doing the best we can, but we're not here. Go ahead. I was just going to say, just to echo your point, the, the beauty of the Facebook community on, on the double decker group is there are folks that are just adamantly not that are big fans of our show that are not watching these because it infuriates them. And there are others that are watching, even though they strongly disagree.

[00:13:18] And the comments are all respectful. Like it's crazy. And helping me learn stuff and giving me good perspective. Cause I really am trying to keep a level head. I 100% and they're all like, even when I disagree, super duper amazing group of people. And it's just crazy that you can actually have some sort of fruitful discussion in that regard on the internet these days. Back to you. 100%. 100%. So, uh, so I want to be fair to us.

[00:13:44] Uh, several people said that there are small details that we are missing, which I want to say is totally fair. Yeah. Like, you know, I have, I'm going to give you a reason and I don't want it to sound like an excuse. I'm going to give you a reason why that's happening, at least for me, but on the point of that, just as a point of contention with us, it's totally fair. We have not been super sharp for seasons halfway. I would probably a few episodes in the season two when we were all, at least me and Dan and Brian was kind of like, no, I think it's still good.

[00:14:12] Uh, but like, uh, like still good. Um, we have not been sharp since the middle of season two onward and my recall for season two and three and how season two and three specifically might impact things that we are seeing in these episodes is not good. I will tell you though, the reason I think that has happened is because the show has lost my faith and you know, people were bringing up, it was actually really cool over the last week.

[00:14:38] People were bringing up some of our more absurdist theories, uh, about like how this, yeah. Or about how like the old guy from the record. Oh yeah. The archive room was Jacob. Like, and we were so stupid. Like those were so bad, but you know why we were doing that even a little bit in the season two and possibly even early on to season three, because we still really cared. Right. And like, we, we wanted, the show had proven to us that they could do exciting and cool

[00:15:05] things and we wanted cool and possibly really dumb, but exciting things to happen. And whereas now I said to someone, uh, and I think you two will agree with this. I don't think we're probably going to do a lot of that these last eight episodes from here on out because they've lost our ability to kind of really dive in no pun on the possible exciting opportunities. Um, I I've lamented the Jacob thing all in all. Jacob wasn't, I'm going to keep trying to tie it to the episode. Jacob wasn't in this episode. Obviously they mentioned him and I saw a coming up. Yeah.

[00:15:35] I saw a coming up this season preview before this episode that I didn't see last week. I know there was going to be an arc there. I don't think that they're just going to write Jacob out of the show. Um, but I didn't, again, I didn't miss his presence this week. I'm not really interested in what's going on in Toronto. And I've said this so much over the last two years. So I'm not going to general or just with him. Like you hate Toronto or do you hate the city of Toronto? I, I, the, the six is really cool. Okay. All right. I I'm, I'm hip. Yeah.

[00:16:04] Um, but, uh, like, I, you know, I think a lot of people agree with us that the 1800s decision was definitely where they lost me. Right. Like, uh, and I know I've talked so much about that, so I'm not going to do it at length here, but it's, it was just one of those, again, one of these episodes where I'm just like, oh man, like if they had just zigged and zagged on a few of these things, I think I could be a lot more in. And so it was reassuring to hear that some people agreed with us on that.

[00:16:31] Um, you know, I was reminded of, like I said, several of those opportunities, but, uh, where we were kind of having fun ultimately though. Um, when it comes to what this season is trying to pay off, I just don't have any faith that they're going to pay off anything of substance or interest to me. I saw several people talking about how Kat's birthday is wrong now. And like a show like this, you have to be attentive to the details. You gotta care that much. Yeah. Right.

[00:16:58] Especially when they made us sit through all that math last week about when, uh, two years off, it could be off. There's a, yeah. Yeah. Like, so, and like that stuff that again, admittedly, I'm not going to be picking up on cause I'm, I'm not as invested as I used to be. Um, but it just feels like time and again, the logic and the, the plotting that a show like this takes is missing the mark or just not being paid enough attention to. Um, there's not a, there's not brand. I will say this, this episode was fine.

[00:17:25] Like I said, but there's not enough interest for me to think that anything they will do over the next seven weeks leading into the finale, the series finale is going to have me like at the edge of my seat wondering what's going to happen. And that's a bummer, but I guess I just wanted to try and articulate some of the reasons as to why I am there now. Sure. I think that's really fair. I think, uh, we're never, I don't think the three of us will ever be as excited about the show as we were in season one.

[00:17:53] Um, that would be a, uh, a large ask for the show at this point because of how in we were in one and how far we are kind of removed from it. Uh, but I have gone into this season, uh, pretty open to whatever. And this is absolutely not on the level of season one from intrigue or even storytelling in my perspective, in my opinion, but I did like this episode.

[00:18:21] I really enjoyed the back and forth that we had. It was moving. We're moving. We are bouncing back every other scene from the seventies to the twenties and both kind of on a similar course, but with different things going on that I assume are all going to at some point connects all of the dots that we have. Um, so yeah, I, I, there's still stuff. Like I, I sometimes I feel dumb watching a show like this because I hear like the name

[00:18:50] Griffin and I'm like, ah, um, and it's just like, you know, should I know? Should I know? I don't know. I feel dumb for not remembering if I should know or not. And so, and, but that's not a, this show thing. That'd be any show that is heavily reliant on like clues and stuff. It's never like, even when I watched lost, I wasn't like, I didn't have a board, uh, that I was like connecting. So it's just not the way that I'm wired when I watch TV. I just either want to be entertained and not bored. The great shows are for that's all.

[00:19:19] Most of us, most of us aren't, don't have a corkboard out and the great shows allow you to watch. And sure. I would agree with that. And so that's how season one felt of this show. Yeah. Correct. There is a, yeah, I, I am at least intrigued at where this season is going. I have not been bored through these first two episodes and I'm open to seeing where we go, but, uh, I don't believe that at the end of it, I'm going to be like, it was all worth it.

[00:19:44] The season two, three, and four have been worth it at the expense of a season one. Dan, I guess real quick, Dan, before you start, I should just say, and I don't mean this as an insult. I'm just literally stating a point of fact. I would say the reason I crafted my hot take the way I did is because I was generally bored by this episode. And I don't mean that as an insult. It just didn't capture my interest. Yeah. I, I, I, here's what I'll say. Another version of the same thing you've heard already, but I, there, there's nothing outright

[00:20:12] wrong about this episode of television. And I was, I tuned out during brand synopsis because I found the repeating, the repetition of the thing that I tuned out during. Must be nice. Boring. And I, I guys, and he did a great job of that synopsis. Cause when I popped back in, I was like, man, he really is saying things that I forgot. Look, it's not Dan Janot seems like a fun edition of the show. The 1920s is always a fun time travel place to go to.

[00:20:41] Uh, this is all well and good. And these characters and actors are more than capable. Um, I took, to make it make sense because I know that there's a lot of pushback and I, from people that I really truly respect and I appreciate as, uh, folks have known for a long time. I, here's what I did. I wrote down all the stuff I was excited about in season one or in the show. Um, the rules of the pond, huge one. Where is Jacob or what happened to Jacob? Does Del know about the pond? Uh, has she time traveled?

[00:21:10] Does, how did Colton die? Did he know about the pond? Was he nefarious? Uh, this idea of not being able to change the past or, and generational trauma from the matriarchy, like from female to female, will Kat reconcile with Del? Will she treat her daughter differently? Um, I, all of those things in season one were burning questions and they were edge of your seat reveals or what? That's what I was hoping. And I think we would all agree on all of those.

[00:21:40] Those are all very big. Um, I think we'd all agree that all of those have been answered. Um, yeah. Yeah. And so what I have left on my board is Sam and Casey question mark. Um, I, I don't, we didn't get enough Casey. I think originally they thought that Casey was a child of Kat and then they, they don't. And then is Sam nefarious? It seems like he might be. And then Elliot's mom. Those are the things left.

[00:22:11] I don't know how, like in my brain, if this show is a pizza that you're supposed to enjoy, all that's left are crusts. I, I don't know how else to, to like the most enjoyment I can get out of this is maybe there's a remnant on that crust of something that reminded me of the actual pizza. Like it just, they don't have, there's nothing left for me and I'm trying, I'm not, not trying.

[00:22:38] And this is not, look, there were some actively bad moments at where you were miserable in the 1800s brand. And this is not that I think, I think that the twenties are like, but like Fern and the movie and the lighthouse, I just, there's nothing here as we're supposed to be full steam ahead towards a series finale. There's nothing here that isn't kind of on the margins.

[00:23:06] And so it's boring and it's tedious and it's unfortunate and it's not how I wanted things to end and I would love for the last few episodes to change my tune. But while this episode marginally, I think was better than the first one. It still doesn't, it still had all of the same cardinal sins that the series has carried with it.

[00:23:28] And now we only have to unfold what's left or create another big shocking reveal that I think they will struggle to backtrack to make sense. And so it's just kind of unfortunate and boring and disappointing. And I want to be respectful, but I also am not going to sit here and tell you that I like it when I don't, because it's not good. It's time for all the feels. Rye guy, anything give you feels to the point of the pizza, the remnants of the pizza, Papa Landry popped up for a quick snipper or two.

[00:23:58] And then that dude's just a great actor. Um, and again, to try to be fair to the critics and to myself, his stuff last season, although I thought wasn't always plotted. Great. The big moments with him last season, especially in that finale, I loved and like the reveal when we realized that he was a time traveler last season, we saw him in the distance in the woods. I didn't think that ended up making a ton of sense how they did it, but I remember even last season being like, well, that's a really cool moment.

[00:24:26] And I really liked it's one of those things where it's kind of hard. You know, we were, we did a Christmas Carol adaptation a few weeks ago, uh, that was really bad. And I, what I said during that podcast was it's hard to ruin the ending of a Christmas Carol. Like it's hard to ruin Scrooge waking up and being a selfless giver and a compassionate individual that cares about the wellbeing of others. I think that works almost every time the movie we watched actually screwed it up somehow. It's hard, even though it doesn't make sense.

[00:24:54] It's hard to mess up Colton getting five more minutes with Elliot or Colton seeing, getting to relive him. It's hard to mess that up. I mean, that's just human emotion. And I think that does work regardless. So I agree. That's the plans and that, what's that? Five more minutes. We're just singing. Old Scotty McCreary. Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt your harmony. No, it's okay. I know. So that dude's great. And, um, I'll do my best from here forth, literally from here forth to not just keep lamenting what I used to like and what I don't think works. I'll try to just focus on the episodes.

[00:25:21] So it's, I'm just worried that me focusing on the episodes will be a very quick. Yeah. I didn't think it was very good. So I'll, I'll have to reckon that reconcile that over the next week. Yeah. And figure out how to, how to do better with that. My kids, uh, still will, I think, uh, at least my youngest when he, instead of saying I recognize that he'll say, I reckon that I reckon that I love that. And I will not correct him because it's hilarious. Absolutely. Um, my feels is I will focus on something that I really like.

[00:25:49] I think that this actor playing the 1920s Fern is an absolute blast. Mm-hmm. And I think she's giving a great performance. It's very fun. And every time that she's on the screen, it's very like, this is, this, it has life. Uh, maybe that's, you know, the type of character she's playing is 1920s. It's a wild time. We're doing the Charleston. Yeah, we are. Teach me how to Charleston. Teach me how to Charleston. Exactly right. Um, but I think that she's also, she's also very fun.

[00:26:15] And I think that that's, uh, helping a lot with my enjoyment and ability to pay attention because it's not like a boring character. She's, she's fun and is doing something. Dan? Uh, similarly, I will say it's our boy Dan Janot. Uh, Dan Janot is in a 20s suit. He's got a mustache on. He's doing a full thing as a prohibition agent. More on that later, I promise. But he seems to be having a blast and the dude has charisma for days. And so I'm not mad at all.

[00:26:44] The only thing I can hope is somehow he's cat's new love interest and the cat and Elliot don't end up together. That would maybe save the series. You know what I did find? I did find Dell asking if they're going to still get married because of time travel and intrigue and intriguing way out. Setting up some doubts. I wouldn't, I wouldn't get your hopes up. The way, but we might find our way though, the way home. Let's go. All right, let's take a break. We'll come back. We'll get to the way. What? And the sink or swim. Come on, Brian.

[00:27:13] Here are decked off, Mark. I'm sorry. Haven't had lunch. None of us have. You and I have had the same. We both have had a protein bar. But I read a lot. Yeah. So then you have to at least like that. But we both have had a protein bar. You're the one that's bringing it up. Well, the battery drains. I had a protein bar earlier than you had. The synopsis was really long. You could tune out. I couldn't. That's true. So I think that's important. It's true. You might have a little more gas in the tank. Snickers should sponsor the show. It's time for the way. What?

[00:27:42] So we're talking about what in this. I buy to Snickers and I'm like, season four is the best way home's ever been. Right. I anyway. What's I only have two and not because I have to go soon. Fern behind the curtain. That was you ripping the curtain down and burning it. It's finally up time. I don't know what I'm going to eat, but that's not a that's not a protein bar. No, we have some leftover.

[00:28:11] We have some leftover ground turkey, but that's not lunch. You know, like, no, not by itself. Not by itself. Yeah. It's like, you don't know the portion size on it. I know. Not a lot. You don't know the portion size. You dumb, dumb, dumb person. I hate myself. Fern hiking her skirt up to hitchhike in the 20s. That's like very risque for Hallmark. I couldn't believe it. But for time period, very accurate. Oh, yeah. I just was like, I said, oh, my.

[00:28:42] And then she teaches cat. It's just. Yeah. It's too much. And then I might have said this last season. And maybe this is just me. I turned 36 the other day. Happy birthday. Thanks, man. I really appreciate it. It means a lot coming from you. But how Alice can just have a middle of the day. Welcome back milkshake. Like, it's not going to ruin her stomach dinner and the rest of the night. Are you nuts? No lactate in sight.

[00:29:10] I don't think lactate even existed in the 70s. Are you kidding me right now? You know who else can do that, right guy? Me. Dude, you guys are nuts. I do have it. And I deal with the consequences. That's right. Dude, I had. We split the brownie at birthday dinner the other night. And there was some caramel gelato on it. And like, I didn't know. I didn't know if I'd be able to be here today. Brian and I's favorite place to eat in Columbia, South Carolina. Sometimes we end the meal with.

[00:29:39] They literally call it a softball size, but it's bigger of caramel fried ice cream. So it's deep fried, battered and fried. And it's the best. I know I'm not going to be pleased later. And I'm fine. But I never. Dude, is that like lunch? We do it at lunch. Yeah. Oh my God. Yeah. It is. It is at least. It's at least three or four cups of ice cream. And we go. We finished the whole thing. Caramel sauce, fried, batter, friendship.

[00:30:08] And I literally don't even. Like, it doesn't mess with my stomach at all. I'm envious, man. Although maybe I'm not. Because I feel like if I had that ability, if I had that superpower, I would use it. Look, I used to be 100 pounds heavy. You know what I mean? Like, I got you. Yeah, I mean, you're playing with house money here for like the next 10 years of your life, I feel like. Right? No kidding. No kidding. Good. Is that it? That's it for me. When Elliot is talking to Del in the barn, she's asking him to like do something, fix something.

[00:30:36] He puts a screw in the middle of a piece of wood. And I, for the life of me, cannot tell you what the purpose of that screw is. There's not like something gets connecting. There's not like, it's not like a, hey, I'm going into this to do that. And if I'm catching it as somebody who is as unhandy as I am, there's a problem. There's a problem. When, what's his name?

[00:31:03] The guy in the 20s, Grayson, proposes to Fern. It's a green ring. It's a green ring. Yeah. And it's like, what is this guy? Oz or something? Green lantern over here? What is he? Is he Oz? Is he Oz? No. Is he Oz? Is he Oz? Is he of old city? What is this guy? Oz or something? Oz? Oh my God. And what about the spoil? Oh man.

[00:31:33] I wrote a wait for life in parentheses there. It's good. You got it, man. And then, I don't know. Like maybe lead with the maiden name thing or like say it earlier or something. The fact that they wait until the end of this episode to be like, oh my maiden name. Like the fact that right before jumping in is like, oh also, she could go by Augustine. Chance she goes by maiden named Tessa Cooper. Jumps in.

[00:32:00] And you think that's going to make me go, oh my God? No. What? Yeah, exactly. Maybe wait. Maybe wait. Or maybe do it first. Maybe right when you jump out. Like I'm looking for a Tessa Augustine. Do it anyway other than you did it. That's right. Maybe I'm looking for Tessa Augustine. She could go by Tessa Cooper. It could go either way. It could go either way. When you're asking people around town, do the same thing. Give them all possible options. Do the same thing. Give them all possible options. Dana? Yeah, I forgot. I watched this two days ago, and so I forgot who said this.

[00:32:30] But someone says she was a fan of T.S. Eliot. And someone else responds, the poet? No, the door dasher. Yes. Yes, the poet. The only one you can do this with is Michael Jordan because of Michael B. Jordan. You can't possibly be like he was a fan of Shakespeare. The writer? No, it's a friend of mine, Gary Shakespeare. Huge fan. What are you doing? The actor?

[00:33:00] The actor? She was a fan of T.S. Eliot. That's very fun. The poet. Get out of here. The ball player? She's a fan of Papa John. The pizza man. Guys, you can't do it. You can't. You can't do it. Hey, Fern's wearing her engagement ring on the wrong hand. We need to bring it up. It's a real weight what? Engagement rings, as far as I'm aware. Maybe I'm wrong and can learn something. Go on the left hand. In the 20s? Maybe they did. She put that. Maybe. What is he?

[00:33:30] Oz? Oz. The Oz. I don't care who says it. It's good. Right. Puts that bad boy on the right finger. And I do want to be clear. It's time for Dan's History Corner. Welcome on in. And you can leave anytime you want. The door's open. I'm going to eat my lunch. Prohibition. Thank you, guys. No, thank you for the support. I appreciate it. Prohibition did not outlaw the drinking of alcohol.

[00:33:59] Like, it didn't. Unless there was a specific city or local ordinance, you could not get in trouble for drinking alcohol. The 18th Amendment and the Volstead Act, which most people will reference, that outlawed the manufacturer's sale and transportation of alcohol. A prohibition agent couldn't see a woman drinking from a flask and go, fine, or jailed. That's not how that worked.

[00:34:24] A prohibition agent was cracking down on people who were transporting, selling, trading, or making booze. So, the idea that there's a big twist that Dan Janot's like, here's my badge, now you're in trouble. That's just not how that would work at all. And then lastly, Dan Janot comes in the room and then leaves. This is in the trailer. And then she proceeds to complain about him to Kat and calls him a flat tire.

[00:34:54] Like, as he's boring. Right? Everybody remember this. Yes. Thanks. This episode was a flat tire. That's right. You said it. Later, at the end of I'm Gone, I don't know. Can you hear me, Ryguy? I got you. Can you not hear me? Because I can't hear me. You just go ahead. Okay. Later in the episode, he drives up and she looks at him and goes, well, if it isn't Mr. Flat Tire. And that's not something he's aware of. So, like, it would be like if Ryguy, you and I, on the side, were like, what is brand? Oz?

[00:35:24] Like, but we didn't say anything to him. Can you imagine? Right? Like, like the two of us had our own powwow. And then brand walked in the room later and we went, oh, if it isn't Mr. Oz, you can't do it. And I would say Dr. Oz to you. That's right. He doesn't know. You called him that behind his back. Now you're saying it to his face like he was a part of that conversation. That's not how that would go. That's all I got. It's time for sink or swim. Right? Hi.

[00:35:54] There's the torn up picture, right? At the end of the episode. Yeah. And so not the person they tear out. The person closest to the tear. I thought it was Jax for a second. And I was like, oh my God, I'm going to have to start speaking positively. Yeah, it's going to be tough. And so it wasn't her. So I'm swimming that. But then I'm thinking that it wasn't her because I was really excited at the prospect. Of course. Of it being her. Yeah. A lot was happening there. You got it on the screen for us.

[00:36:22] I got this on for like, maybe it was just like the shading on my, like maybe like the color contrast on my picture. But I thought it looked like her. It does look like Jax a little bit. I could see it for sure. Yeah. Absolutely. How about that? It could have been. You guys are swinging a miss. Hallmark. Could have been Jax. Just do it already. Yeah. Just do it. Hire her. Nike, bro. Just do it. Um, I am swimming.

[00:36:51] I forgot about the segment. I'll be honest with you. You're about to have lunch. You're swimming. I'm about to have lunch. I'm thinking that we did not get any salmon this episode. And is that his name? Sam? Sam or Sam? Salmon is what I thought you said. I thought he was talking about the fish. I was like, are salmon normally appearing at the lobster social? Hey, it's the salmon. Salmon. I didn't know that you were invited to the social. I need water. I need water. What's going on at the salmon extravagant? It's upstream all day. You know what I mean?

[00:37:20] We're very social here, salmon. Same stream. Different day. Same day. Different day. Sam was the guy I thought could be a horse. No, Colton was horse. Colton was horse and the soil was magic. Sam might be nefarious. Probably not. Yeah. We didn't get any Sam and- We didn't get any- No. Sam is interesting and- What is their name? KC. KC. Where's KC? KC hasn't even been in the previously on. With the sunshine band, from what I understand. Right. Yes. Yeah.

[00:37:50] But there's a chance like KC, the way that KC ended their- That was it. Arc at the end of three, that could be it. So I don't know. Or they're just going to save it for the finale. I don't know. Yeah, we'll see. It doesn't really- It was such a peripheral- Do you know where KC is? Has anybody seen KC? Is she swimming down the street? A bear! A bear! Are these bears getting a salmon, guys? Oh, so those are the- That's a lobster. Yeah, the salmon was talking to the lobster. That's a lobster. A bear is a salmon's mortal enemy. Sometimes you guys are on another level. We are. I can't even- What is he, Oz? Yeah.

[00:38:22] You guys washed Oz? Yeah, my real swim is that Oz joke. That was- Ripper. That was a ripper. Wait for applause. I'm swimming that I also get to have lunch. I'm also swimming the Oz joke. And I'm swimming Rai Dai being done in time for his- No, it'll be fine. I just don't know when I'm going to eat. I'm thinking- Listen, wind calls the heart is fun because we know it's bad. Even on the good days, we know it's bad. I'm thinking just us having to do this. Yeah, real quick. What should I do next week?

[00:38:49] If I think the episode is as uninteresting as I did next week- I'd say you just keep it to that. You just say, hey, another said, same for me, double. It was uninteresting again. It's boring. It's not- I don't want people to think I'm phoning this in. If you want out, you can give us one more. No, I want to keep going. Honestly, even easier if my hot take, if I don't have to formulate one. I mean, so no, I want in. I just want to be very careful here, but it's tough. It is hard. I find this difficult. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, we did it, everybody. Congratulations to us. We give you permission to eat lunch.

[00:39:18] Wherever it is and whatever time it is for you, you go eat your lunch. Until then, next time, may we first wish you a Merry Christmas. Next time. Deck the Hallmark's a Bramble Jam podcast produced by Brandon Gray. And you have that Greenville, South Carolina. For more information on the show, go to deckthehallmark.com. Follow us on the socials at Deck the Hallmark. Leave us a rating and review. Five stars, if you please, on Apple Podcasts. Heading over to the best corner of the internet where people hate our way home takes. It's a Facebook community. It's a live video. Watch along. It's movie chats. It's so much more. And ad-free podcasting as well.

[00:39:47] That's bramblejamplus.com. If you'd like for us to teach you how to Charleston, stay tuned. Same goes for me double. You're about to hear some ads that help keep the lights on here in the old studio. Thanks for listening or don't listen. It's really up to you at this point. It's at the end of the show. I mean, you're listening to me. Hi. But here they come. I promise they're coming. Yep. Here they are. Happy day. Happy day. Happy day. Happy day. Thank you.