Thor: Love and Thunder

[00:00:04] This is a Bramble Jam Podcast Hi, I'm Bran. I love Marvel movies. Hi, I'm Ryan and I like Marvel movies. I'm Dan and sometimes I love Marvel movies and sometimes Christian Bale. And this is the Deck The Hallmark. Deck The Hallmark, it's his podcast. Friends host his podcast.

[00:00:33] We hope you like this jolly podcast. Well, hello everybody. Oh, hi. Hey. It's great to be here today talking Thor: Love and Thunder. And Rye Guy is here with us. Sans Crocs is my understanding. What? You're not wearing Crocs today. What does that have to do with anything? So I typically wear, I have this really cool pair of Nerf Crocs. Awesome, man.

[00:01:04] Yeah, they're right off screen. Great. They're like literally, they're five paces away. That's fantastic. I typically wear them or in the wintertime. I wear this nice pair of slippers that Alyssa gifted me for Christmas a couple years ago. And a shout out to her. I typically wear them because I don't know if this is because I'm short or if because my, the chair I record in isn't the tallest or the highest, if you will. Okay.

[00:01:32] Um, you guys have seen me in person, you know, a time or two. I'm, I'm, I'm a skosh under five eight. I fib it and tell people I'm five eight. You wear it well. Yeah. Thank you. I appreciate it. I would imagine I'm of regular height for, you know, like, um, I think that's about, you know, average height. Yeah. Uh, you know, but what do shoes while you're sitting have to do with this? That's right. So I have a boost that I record. Uh, when I record in here, I have a, I have a boost. It's called what's it called?

[00:02:02] It's called. You have a, you were, you're in a booster seat right now. It's called the no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. The floor. It's called the caboose. Uh, I am not in a booster seat, but my, my chair is raised off the ground. Oh, I'm looking up the caboose. Yeah. I don't even know if it's still, I got off Amazon, uh, literally whenever I started recording in this room. So what am I, I've been here two years now. So maybe it's out of, out of product. What you're saying is because of the caboose, your boost with a K.

[00:02:32] Yeah. Because of the caboose, your feet don't touch the ground. Well, I'm it's sure I know I can reach the ground, but that wouldn't be the most comfortable. Um, it's, but I, I typically rest my feet on the, on the. On the caboose. Uh, and I, it's just nicer to have the crocs on. Cause right now I'm barefoot on the caboose. And it's not uncomfortable. Well, the caboose looks like it is made of a, uh, a metal type. Yeah. Or a hard plastic. Yeah.

[00:03:02] Honestly, this is a really good invention by caboose stink. Uh, are you, are you comfortable standing up and hold, can you hold up the, no, it's really, it's really the toughest part of getting ready to do this every week is getting the caboose like getting the chair in the caboose. It doesn't stay in the caboose. No, I take it out at the end of every episode. I mean, it's pretty intuitive. Uh, it's, I mean, it's elaborate. I mean, it's more like it would make a lot of noise. I'm very close. I don't want to hit the stuff. Why not just lower your camera?

[00:03:32] No, it's not. You're not under you. You got to come over. I mean, yeah. It's yeah. Like if I could have saved the money on the caboose, I would have done. I don't want to. Can you do it? Can you, can you do me this though? Can you, after we get done here before you take the chair out of the caboose? Yeah. Can you take a picture? Like, just show us your setup. Yeah. Maybe post that to the double decker group. So people can. That's reason to be. And we don't have to do this now. I did see barefoot on the caboose live. Really?

[00:04:01] They were phenomenal. They really were good. But also right guy, I do want to point out something else. After last week's super successful episode with a lot of positive feedback, we did get one random email and it just said 13 minutes of shirt talk question mark. That was the whole email. Right. Probably, probably not enough in retrospect. Probably not enough in retrospect. But you are this week for those of you not watching on the YouTube, you're wearing an oversized t-shirt. I can't, I can't help but notice. Not one of the ones that you got from the gap though. No, you didn't go. No, no.

[00:04:31] That's yeah. We'll get to that in a second. Cause I mean, all we definitely need is more t-shirt talk. Yeah. This is a, this is a officially licensed Marvel mighty Thor shirt. And I just got, I believe it's the medium, but I think it just, this is the sweet spot when they just run oversized to begin with. That's a medium oversized for sure. I mean, that hemline is way down here. Right. I think that's the sweet spot. Yeah. I'm also wearing my Thor love and thunder hat. It's not oversized though. Cause that'd be, those are a thing. Those are a thing.

[00:05:00] Have you seen those big hats? Yeah. They're really funny. Big hats are really funny. Yeah. Big hats. Yeah. With the oversized ones. You know what I'm talking about? No, they're just like big. They were popular in the NFL a couple of years ago. There's a baseball team that does a home run celebration with the oversized. Yeah. Yeah. You know what you're talking about? I don't have one, but they're fun. Um, I don't think this is going to be a good visual aid, which isn't to say it's not going to be a good conversation. Cause again, the feedback has been ripped roaringly positive. Well, yeah, here's one of the gap shirts.

[00:05:30] I love the fit. Also Dustin Keating is in the chat right now. Britt Bristow's husband, Dustin trophy, husband, Dustin. And he said, it's a boy's extra medium. What an, what a, what a first time for him to be in the chat. Shout out. Uh, uh, so I don't think this is going to illustrate well, especially if you're listening, the fit is perfect. What Alyssa and I are concerned about with these gap tees is that, um, we're worried that when they wash that they're going to, they're going to shrink and it's going

[00:05:59] to become like belly T adjacent. That's the, that's the problem with the box. Yeah. Okay. So that's because like the, the sleeve, like the look, the fit is great. Absolutely. No, I have an Orlando magic tee. That is a box and I really liked the tee. It's a cool pocket tee, but I, you know, I've washed it a few times now and it's just right on the edge of, but that's the problem. Your torso and me, my height, like I, the reason I, I'm, I wear not exclusively, I wear

[00:06:26] whatever black t-shirt I can find, but my favorite is this one, which is from American Eagle. It's an $8 shirt, but it's a large, it's a large tall. So like I, it doesn't, it, it is long enough for me, which is fantastic. And I usually can't find that because after like 10 or 12 wears the shirts going to start riding up for me. If it's just a regular shirt. Should I go boxy tall? Do the gap has boxy tall? I think American Eagle, you could go in this shirt, you could go medium tall and it would probably look oversized on you and be perfect.

[00:06:56] But that's me doing free American Eagle workout here. So I'll have to think about a lot to think about. I, I brand, I know we got a lot to get to, but I think at least five to six more minutes of t-shirt talk now feels right. I will say in the chat, you're getting some positive comments. People saying the shirt you have on right now looks great. It does. So how do you feel like what's the, how far does that go down on your body? That's a really great question, Brandon. I appreciate it. I know that it involves you getting up off the caboose. Oh, that's a, that's a great looking shirt. That's a really good. No, this shirt rules.

[00:07:27] It's one of my favorite graphic tees. That shirt is so much better than this movie. It's crazy. No, no. My favorite picture of this movie is the, you know, Natalie Portman. The first time you see her just looking ripped in the Thor outfit, I think is really awesome. That shirt's amazing. So great. Thank you. Um, well, let's all get in our caboose and, uh, talk about, you don't need one, bro. You're like six, four, Dan. Yeah. Talk about Thor love and thunder.

[00:07:57] A, uh, June 23rd, 2022 premiere ads. The Dolby. No, we were at Dolby last week. No, El Capitan. Okay. Um, and then July 8th, 2022. So almost two, two full weeks. Wow. Before, uh, everybody else here in the United, these here United States. And it went a little something like this, uh, meet Gore and his daughter love.

[00:08:23] They're the, uh, last survivors of their race and love ends up dying despite their constant prayers to the gods. And Gore finds himself not being too pleased with the gods. Why? Pray to the gods. If I'm going to lose my daughter anyway. Defy the gods. A good question. A good question.

[00:08:46] And he decides I'm going to find a weapon that will allow me to kill all of the gods. But let's catch up with our old pal Thor first. He is in shape now. He's hanging out with the guardians of the galaxy. Thor's ex-girlfriend Jane Foster, though things are not so good for her. She is battling terminal cancer. Uh, desperate for a miracle.

[00:09:12] Jane travels to new Asgard where the broken hammer mysteriously reforms and comes to her because she's worthy. Thor arrives just as Gore attacks new Asgard and is shocked to find Jane there holding his hammer. They team up with Val. Thank you.

[00:09:37] They team up with Valkyrie and my boy Korg to fight Gore, but Gore escapes with several Asgardian children because I guess that's just what bad guys do in superhero movies. Now they just take children. It's an ongoing theme. Uh, the group heads to, uh, to a city to tell all the gods, Hey, someone wants to kill us all, all the, all the gods.

[00:10:05] Um, but also will you help us Zeus though? No real interest in getting involved in this whole thing. Um, instead he tries to keep Gore from discovering the city's location. And when Zeus injures Korg Thor turns on him, stealing his magical thunderbolts before escaping with Valkyrie and the others Thor learns that Jane is dying of cancer, which obviously makes

[00:10:30] him real sad and they end up kissing through rainbow travel, uh, on the rainbow road. Actually, they go to Marble's rainbow road. Yep. Let's a go. Let's a go. Uh, Thor, uh, the group travels to the shadow realm where they discover Gore's plan to use

[00:10:59] stormbreaker badly injuring Valkyrie and leaving Jane incredibly weak. Thor realizes that the hammer is actually making Jane's condition worse by preventing her body from doing what it needs to do. Knowing that he may not have much time, Thor heads to eternity alone using Zeus's thunderbolts that he now has.

[00:11:21] He gives all of the kidnapped children powers so they can fight Gore and hopefully help save the day. When Jane realizes that Thor is in danger, she joins him to help knowing that this is going to be probably it for her. She's not going to make it through this. He makes, uh, Gore makes his wish, uh, but ends up dying. He asks Thor before he dies to take care of love. He wished that his child would come back.

[00:11:50] Um, the hits keep coming. Jane ends up dying in Thor's arms and the aftermath though, Thor returns to new Asgard and joins, uh, and love joins Thor on some adventures. Thor with hammer love with stormbreaker. And those two become an unlikely duo. And that my friends was Thor love and thunder. Yeah. We did it.

[00:12:17] I was going to say an unlikely duo called love and thunder, but then I was like, but then I have to do it again. And so it's in the movie. Yeah. We saw it coming the whole way. Let's take a break. We'll come back. We'll break this movie down here on deck. The hallmark marble board sponsored by caboose and American Eagle. Welcome back. Everybody. We should probably reach out to caboose at the very least. At the very least. Yeah.

[00:12:47] Give them a shout. I, I don't, I, I guess I don't want to say this with any firm confidence, but I'd like to think of this isn't like, you know, exalting my name, but I'd like to think that I'm their most high profile client. Right. Well, there's no way to go to their website that I didn't see anybody else. I mean, I, I, I, I always love to give the brands the free shout out before reaching out for a page. That's the killer. That's how you do it. You know, give a little taste. That's right. A little taste of what you can get. American Eagle is going to be flooded with people wanting black t-shirts. I know. And you know what I mean?

[00:13:16] Like there's just going to be crazy. Eight bucks. You're welcome. Eagle. That's right. Welcome America. I think it was on sale. Okay. Yeah. All right. Let's get to Thor. I got a bunch of colors. Not just, I just bought a bunch of colors. Wow. Just a blue and pink one, green one. It's got a bunch. You have a pink one. I've worn it in here before. It's like a darker pink. It's not like a bright pink. Maybe some people would maybe not call it pink. You know, you see me. Yeah. I think I know what you're talking about. I'll call it. We're inching closer to another 50 minutes. T-shirt. Sorry. Sorry.

[00:13:45] Sorry guy that emailed us. I apologize. Got away from us. Yeah. We love t-shirts. We love t-shirts. All right. Let's get to, look, we're starting the hot take. Yeah. We're not even close. We're already hot take in 13 minutes. We are starting the hot take in the amount of time that it took to get. Took us to finish shirt talk last week. Oh, we crushed it. We're doing really well. We're doing really good. Okay. Hot take. What you got, Ryguy? You have kind of historically said that you like this movie. Yeah. Saw spot for this movie. Saw spot. For sure.

[00:14:14] You've rewatched it now. Yeah. You're wearing the merch. That's right. I'm looking at the poster. You're looking at the poster on your caboose. You're closer to, to it than ever before. I'm higher. I'm more eye level with it than ever before. Yeah. It's the same distance, Fran. Don't be an idiot. Well, no, if you're lower, if you're not caboosed, you are further. You're further. You would by definition be. So don't, don't be an idiot. That's how the Pythagorean theorem works.

[00:14:44] Um, so I was prepared to say for however many years we've been doing this now, the Marvel boys, uh, I've been prepared this whole time, especially this less than one to say, to say that star mission, furious. Marvel is going to be an awesome ranking. Dude. I'm already like, I have, uh, I have Gie Jermaine ahead of Thor, the dark world for sure. Can you imagine having Bram rake all 85 of those movies? Him being like, what? I don't know. I don't remember that.

[00:15:14] I have Fulton slap shot. I do love adding the, the 90s sports moves. The ranking of the kids. I think that's only fair. Henry Rowan Gardner, infinity war. Yeah. Go ahead. Dustin's in the chat right now. Like, why do I hang out with these guys? What are these guys doing? Yeah. Um, so I've been prepared this whole way through from literally the start, but especially the of this week to say, which is probably something that should be said more on this network, which is that quote, this movie is bad, but I love it anyway.

[00:15:44] There you go. I love that take. Yeah. Hold on. That's what he said. He was prepared. Oh no, he's not going to say it. I don't know if so. I saw this twice in theaters, loved it both times. Um, and really is real. I was so excited about this. As I mentioned, when we watched Thor one, um, without any real knowledge of the comics, I was always like, man, Natalie Portman's one of, if not my favorite actress. It would be really cool if she was a superhero. Right. Yeah. And so the fact that this exists and comic accurate and blah, blah, blah.

[00:16:12] Like I learned that over the years, but like, it was like, wow, this is like the thing that I wanted to have happen. So I saw it twice in theaters, really enjoyed it both times, admitted its faults, which I'll get to in a second. I don't know if in good faith, and this is maybe a bit of a hedge. I still love it. I don't know if I can call it bad. Cause on third watch, I hadn't seen it since those two times in theaters. I still really, really flipping enjoyed it. Um, but here's the legitimate defense for Thor love and thunder by my math.

[00:16:40] This is the eighth time we've seen Thor in a substantial way for Thor's for Avengers films. Okay. Um, so if you look at this film, which is kind of how they, uh, frame it a lot throughout the film, a lot throughout the film as just a, another Thor adventure, a Saturday morning cartoon with Thor and a cast of characters that you've gotten to know. I think it's pretty enjoyable though.

[00:17:06] That's not to say that some of the jokes don't land cause they don't, I'm, I'm not here to think, you know, Natalie Portman, uh, you know, bop into the, the portable speaker doesn't work. Right. There's things like that that just don't work that aren't funny. Um, and if the movie was 20% more serious, which is probably what Thor Ragnarok was, right? 20% more serious. I would say 20 to 30% more serious. Yes. Right. That movie, I still have top eight. And I think by my math we'll finish at worst 10th or 11th.

[00:17:34] A lot of people have that as a top five Marvel movie. Yeah. Like considering what we have coming up and I, I have even re-ranked some things in the last couple of weeks, but it will finish at worst top 12. Right. Um, but probably eight to 10. So if this movie was 20% more serious, I think there's a version of it. That's really good. It's also worth noting two things. One, um, there is a pretty, uh, legitimate rumor that Marvel was like, this movie has to come in under two hours. Huh? I don't know why, but, uh, like they were like, maybe it was like kind of like, you know,

[00:18:03] uh, trying to reframe after, you know, kind of what they perceived as a few misses in recent tries, uh, with, uh, you know, multi versus madness mom, if you will. And a few others, the eternals, which is like forever. Like, um, so that, and then this, the original cut of this film, although not put together was apparently four hours long. Jeff Goldblum filled a bunch of stuff for this movie. That doesn't make the cut. Peter. I didn't know that. Yeah. I didn't know any of that information. Yeah.

[00:18:29] And so there's more Jane and Valkyrie and, and that cut to which, uh, uh, what TD has said that, um, I don't know if that version of the movie would have been any better for people cause there would have been a lot more humor, but there also would have been a lot more substance. Right. Um, so again, all of that to say that this movie is nutty and there is a lot of memeable moments, uh, Idris Elba's son just being a floating head and all of that stuff.

[00:18:56] Uh, and yes, there are definitely jokes that fall flat. Mileage may vary on the goats. So to say that I might be the only one who likes them. Um, but the film is absolutely never boring. Um, Christian Bale is in a completely different movie. There it is. He's, he's really going for it in that movie. In his movie, he's crushing it. Yeah. He's crushing it in his movie. Yes. The, the, the tonal imbalances of this film are obvious, right?

[00:19:23] Because I think a lot of, especially watching it this time again, a lot of this stuff doesn't work. I don't know if the Zeus sequence is really needed. Um, but a lot of that stuff still made me laugh, but Christian Bale's doing his thing. Jane Foster has terminal cancer. Uh, and we're making, uh, with TD fart jokes a lot. Right. So, and that's just a crazy juxtaposition. The movie is also a hundred percent trying to do way too much where I will defend it is the under two hours thing.

[00:19:52] I think makes that really complicated. Even if you hate this movie and a lot of people do, I think we could all agree that an extra 15 minutes would have at least fleshed it out more. And maybe you wouldn't have liked that 15 minutes, but like things like why Jane is worthy of the hammer, you know, uh, kind of like why her and Valkyrie are such good friends. Uh, just a little bit more with gore, a little bit more with Thor and Jane even probably would have helped, but I don't know, man. I really enjoyed it.

[00:20:17] And, uh, I, I just, I'm such a Natalie Herschlag Stan that there's no way I couldn't have enjoyed this. Um, I have it. Oh, I should've had, uh, I should have had letterboxd up and running. I apologize for that. Just hold on brand. Stay on your, stay on your single. Everything's going to be fine. I have it 14th overall, uh, one behind 14 overall one. That's basically right in the middle of the pack. Um, just a, a Scotia head.

[00:20:45] I know that's really high for most people for what it's worth. Top half of all Marvel movies. Top half, uh, right at the back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, back, uh, right at the top half, right at the back of the top half. I have it one behind first day of my new tongue. I have one behind the original Avengers. Uh, and, uh, I feel great about it. I, I will watch this. I gotta be honest. That hurt me personally. When you said it was only one behind the original, I originally was going to have it one ahead.

[00:21:14] And then I said, even for me, that's a step. That is a lot. I re-ranked some things. I appreciate how you looked at this critically, even though you clearly adore the movie. Right guy. Even though I'm going to disagree with you wholeheartedly, I really appreciate that take. Really do. And I do want to say, although I feel a little lasting brand. Sorry. I know that was really long. I was like t-shirt talk length. I, I like, I really, I totally understand why people don't like the movie. And like, I don't even have a defense.

[00:21:41] Although I would say that my perception of that is a little softened after this time. In my head, I was like, oh, this is a movie that I just have a super sweet spot for. Uh, and I would admit, like I said, that it's bad. I actually enjoyed the movie from a critical lens a lot more than I thought. But with that said, brand, uh, especially Dan, when you two say you don't like it, no hard feelings. Um, so I actually don't hate this movie. Uh, and it also, good review. It also isn't my least favorite Thor movie. I dislike dark world more than this movie.

[00:22:11] That's the real question. I'm not, I'm not a Ragnarok, uh, Stan. I know so many Marvel heads out there, adore Ragnarok and think it's top 10, top five. Some people it's their favorite. Five seems crazy. It does. I have it at eight feels good. Um, I'm not like this movie is very silly. It is all over the place.

[00:22:36] Um, I do think that like Christian Bale as gore, as you all mentioned, isn't a different movie, but that movie is really good. And that 30 minutes phenomenal. Like that whole sequence where it's black and white and they're in this like amazing he and like, he's given it his all, um, and is great. And the silliness of the rest of it is fine with me. Like they've clearly decided that Thor is silly. Thor is the silly character. We worked in Ragnarok.

[00:23:05] We're going to run it back again and up even a little bit more. Right. For me where the movie kind of loses me. And, uh, it's, it's like the whole terminal cancer storyline is tough for me because it like, I don't know what it is for me. He's also losing his daughter. Sure. Yes. Like it's terminal as well. Yeah. But it's like this, like this idea, like this, these superhero movies, it's, it's, it's, we shouldn't be thinking about real life. It's too, it's too real.

[00:23:34] Like, and I know that that happens occasionally. Like there's real life stuff and real life consequences that does happen. But when you bring in terminal cancer, it is like, Oh, a bit of a real big downer. And, um, in a movie that is very, very silly and fun. And if she has to die, because that is what her character does in the comics, which I assume is what happens.

[00:24:00] Like I, I would like, I wish she could have just died another way that is more in line with other heroes, but I don't like, I don't know enough to know anything. Like to me, I'm watching this movie and every time that cancer is brought back, I'm just like, Oh, like, um, and that's tough because I am having a good time. And the way that's, you know, um, my boy, uh, Grog is telling the story is fun. Like it, that works for me. You guys know I'm a Grog head. And so there is Gorg. Sorry.

[00:24:29] I don't know his name, but I don't know his name, but I am a Grog head. Well, you know what? If they, if they, if I had a toy, maybe this wouldn't have happened. Um, but I, it is fun. It is silly. And that stuff does work for me. It is just the constant, like bringing me back to earth literally, um, with all of the serious real life stuff that I don't like there's, there is a difference in my mind to

[00:24:55] Thanos snapping his fingers and making half of the universe disappear or the world because it's, that's not real. It's silly. Like when you really think about it, that's wild, huh? Like if that's, it's still like in line with like superheroes are here to save the day, but dealing with superhero stuff and the, the cancer storyline is like, it's too real and too serious and not fun.

[00:25:23] So have I got a movie about funny Hitler for you, which I do like, I like Jojo. I know a lot. I know. Um, but Jojo Reb is not a superhero. Correct. So like, there's like, I, I can watch a movie about terminal cancer. I can watch a superhero movie and I can love both of those movies, but when the two merge, it gets messy for me. Um, and so I have this movie at number 24, um, which is smack dab in between two Ant-Man movies.

[00:25:53] Ant-Man, uh, one and Ant-Man and the Wasp is where I have this movie. Snuck outside of the bottom five for you. Uh, it did. Yep. Yeah. Dano. So there's a lot to unpack here. Um, you know, the, the, the clearest cleanest hot take for me is I think that the multiverse of madness is a worse movie than this, but I hate this movie more because of the embarrassment of riches that it has at its disposal to create a tonally imbalanced mess of a movie.

[00:26:20] If you want a, uh, like the epitome of why Marvel holds the reins and not all tours, it's Thor love and thunder because what happened was Taika Waititi is, has a style of filmmaking and that style is not everyone's cup of tea. And I think people love Taika now for what he is and what he means to a lot of these properties like star Wars and the Mandalorian and Marvel.

[00:26:48] But Taika is a New Zealand filmmaker who wants to combine absurdist humor with very deep, like deep scar wound trauma, tough to watch experiences. That is who he is as from the beginning of his filmography. His best movie is hunt for the wilder people. If you've never seen hunt for the wilder people, it tackles foster care and adoption and a, and

[00:27:14] uh, uh, you know what it means to be a parent with some of the silliest, most absurdist scenes. One of my favorite scenes in movie history, Taika Waititi plays a priest giving a eulogy to someone he didn't know and getting sidetracked and trying to bring it back. And it's, it's sad. It's a heartbreaking scene and it's hysterical. This is what this guy lives for.

[00:27:39] Taika lives to make you try to balance your big sads with your big sillies. That's what he really wants to do. And Jojo rabbit, another great example of that. Some people like brand just like, can't, you can't mention the movie without him smiling. Other people hated the movie. Some people kind of in the middle. It's still a very clear work of art from a visionary auteur who knows what he wants to make.

[00:28:06] I say all that to say Thor Ragnarok. They gave him a little bit of wiggle room. Hey, nobody liked the Thor Thor, the dark world. You can make Thor a little different, but there are still stakes in that movie. We've got to rescue Hulk. We've got to go save Asgard. We've got Valkyrie. So what happened was in Thor Ragnarok, even if I'm not as big a fan of it, I can fully admit it is an absolutely rip roaring good time in a romp of a movie. And it worked for those people who were there just for the silly fun stuff.

[00:28:36] But it also worked in the Marvel cinematic universe. And that's because Marvel had a little bit of control. Well, Ragnarok goes bonkers at the box office. Biggest Thor movie ever doubled the original Thor's box office take. And so what happens? We bring Taika back and then we just let go of the wheel and let Taika Taika. And that combined with Thor is a huge problem because I can only imagine Christian Bale, method

[00:29:04] actor Christian Bale has lost and gained 80 plus pounds to play a character in the Machinist and to play Vice President Dick Cheney. This guy cares about the craft. He's one of those guys, right? Like he's deep embedded in his character. And this blockbuster Thor Ragnarok comes out and he gets approached about playing a villain that is trying to defy the great villain to defy the gods because his daughter can't be saved. It's an age old question.

[00:29:33] We're all asking if there's a God out there, why are children dying innocently? That is a big theological existential question. And he gets to sink his teeth in this role. I would have loved to see his face watching the final cut of this movie because in his he he goes MIA and you would agree with this right guy. He goes MIA for well over an hour in this movie. Yeah, 100%. And the opening scene of this movie is amazing.

[00:29:59] Like the sun, the dried earth, the shadows, like him pouring his soul out. And then you get into like screaming goats and fart jokes. And then at the end, we're supposed to really be tugged on our heartstrings by his daughter teaming up with Thor. And so what happens is Christian Bale is giving an Oscar performance from a serious superhero movie. And then the rest of this movie is Taika Waititi doing his thing.

[00:30:27] But instead of with a million dollar budget, it's with a 300 or 200 million dollar budget. And totally the ask here is huge. The ask of the viewer is huge to continually keep your head on a swivel between giant existential questions and a method performance by one of the great living British actors. And this silly world. And then Natalie Portman has cancer.

[00:30:54] And so it is just there is no balance here. There is no homeostasis of navigating through what makes life funny and tragic, heartbreaking and heartfelt. That is when Taika Waititi is at his best. That is out the window. This movie is tone deaf and even it's great scenes bother me. There is Chris Hemsworth gives two or three of the best line deliveries he's ever given on really funny lines.

[00:31:21] And it's just like the problem is, is you're just you never get set to watch the movie that's happening because as soon as you do a different movie is on screen. It's it's more unfortunate than maybe any other Marvel movie. And I wrestled with this and Thor the Dark World because the talent here is undeniable for the dark world at that point is a shorter movie and still kind of matters.

[00:31:46] I don't want to watch either of these movies ever again for very, very different reasons. Right. Was I more entertained by this than the dark world? Yes, is the dark world in my opinion by a nose right now slightly better. Yes, it is. I have this at 27 eternals 29 multiverse of madness 28 Thor love and thunder 27.

[00:32:10] It will escape the bottom five though, because we've got some, some real clunkers coming our way, but I was gobsmacked. I forgot just how crazy the whiplash is in this movie between screaming goats and Christian Bale's villain. It is unlike anything I've ever seen. I don't, I'm trying to like, like, can you imagine if like in the dark night with the Joker, there was like 40, 45 minutes of like Ricky Gervais office character, like just in there.

[00:32:39] And you're like, like, that is what's going on here. No, no. But like, and I, and I look, there are some folks out there that would follow Tycho Atiti to the ends of the earth. And like his new movie looks like it's trash. The, the trailer. You think so? It looks so bad. I thought it looked really good, but I'm, listen, the general take away. He is. Yes. Yeah. As someone that, you know, had a real personal attachment to hunt for the wilder people and still, have you seen it? Yeah. Have you seen hunt for the wilder people? I've not seen it. Okay. Like, I'm just going to keep banging this drum to you. Go watch it.

[00:33:08] It is Sam Neill may rest in peace. Like it's just an amazing movie on so many levels. And I think this, he has, he has such a unique talent that I'll see anything he makes. This is just happens to be the worst thing he's ever made. And I, I'm fine with, if we don't get any more Thor movies. So there's that, but I appreciate if you loved it, but understand that I I'm cool. I'm cool. I think that was my take. Right. Right. Very, very similar. Yeah. Let's let's get to feels really quickly. Uh, right guy. Yeah. I had a bunch.

[00:33:37] So I'll go through them quickly. Uh, herschlag, the goats, Jane steam song, the random moment where Thor gives all the kids powers is pretty baller, even though it doesn't make any sense. Um, but I did think that that scene looked really cool. Looked awesome. I also, I also would say that the brand, you mentioned it and, uh, with TD use some tech that I should have looked up and didn't, but the black and white sequence was actually filmed in a really unique way, which is why it looks as good as it does.

[00:34:03] Um, and that's the one other thing I would give this film is that we, we talk about Marvel CGI all the time. There's some moments where this movie looks like all the other Marvel films, but there's also a lot of moments where it looks significantly better. And that sequence, especially the black and white secrets in this movie. If I felt like it was so incredibly unearned would have been one of my favorite scene sequences and all the Marvel movies. But the problem is right before that there's, you know, it's a different, you know, there's Pratt falls and Bundling. It just feels like it's been dropped out of the sky.

[00:34:33] And Gorg's face is just hanging out on a ship with Tessa Thompson. I get it. Yeah. Totally get it. Those, those are some of mine brand. Yeah. Obviously there's a lot of, uh, funny bits in this movie. Um, but one that I actually don't know if it was supposed to be funny, but it did make me chuckle is just the visual of when they get back from, uh, the battle and, and, uh, Jane is in her hospital bed.

[00:34:57] He's outside the room and the doctor's talking to him and he's in full Thor garb. And then she just says, I'm sorry, Thor, and puts her hand on his shoulder. And that was just a very funny. Okay. Cause he's just in full, full everything that everything she's saying. Very serious. They play it. They play it seriously. Um, but also I will say, uh, I, the scene at the end of the movie with love, like is

[00:35:26] like love and Thor, I think it could be a fun little duo. I don't know if they're going to do anything with it. Oh no. I think that's, I think that's a center doomsday. Um, great. Cause I, I like, I thought that the girl, like the, the, the young actor there was really fun. Like, and had like good comedic timing with, with Thor. And I, I don't know. I don't quote me. That might be his real daughter. No way. No, no way. That's crazy. No way. Um, but yeah, I thought that she was really, really, really great.

[00:35:56] Really cute. All that stuff. Wow. That's that's Chris. She's a Hemsworth daughter. That's India Rose Hemsworth. How about that? That's great. Yep. I mean, I did love, like, I love the scene as a, just a fun, like oil and water comedic scene. And it replicates the flapjack scene from the first movie. And I think that's all great. Just completely unearned. Like that's my problem is, is like, it doesn't unearned once again, like this is a great only I, cause I don't disagree with you.

[00:36:23] I think that's really the only thing, and I don't think the movie, uh, weaves this web well enough is that like, he is trying to save a group of kids, the whole movie and trying to figure out where he belongs. I just don't think those points are ever hammered. Maybe if the, I'm sorry, go ahead. Finish. No, no, I, I, I don't, I don't fully agree with you, but I also don't disagree that. I think that we could have had more emphasis on that throughout the film. If we get Christian Bale's first scene instead sprinkled throughout the movie with flashbacks of him having good times with his daughter. Yeah.

[00:36:53] There's not enough love in this movie for, for almost like the, there should be another movie of the two of them. That's actually love and thunder. Yeah. Cause it's like, we actually get them on screen together for a minute. Yeah. It doesn't, it earns the title. It's not a gun that was ever loaded successfully to really work at the end for me. Yeah. Is it my turn? Um, so yeah, it's a bold move to really craft your entire movie around a guns and roses

[00:37:19] soundtrack, especially when you decide to mention guns and roses in the movie, in the script, but damn if it doesn't work. I mean like, I like guns and roses as a soundtrack to a Taika Waititi superhero movie makes more sense than about anything else in this movie. And there are so many guns and roses songs in this movie. And every time the needle drops, typically you're like, yep, that, that, that would work, including sweet child of mine at the end of the movie.

[00:37:46] Like I think all of those, like, I think it's almost like he reverse engineered an entire movie based upon a guns and roses soundtrack. Like I feel like he may have chosen the soundtrack first. Um, Sam Neill makes an appearance in this movie. I believe Sam Neill tries to pop up in all of Taika Waititi's films. He, he rest in peace to that guy and his entire family. One of our great actors.

[00:38:08] Um, not just, you know, Alan Grant and Jurassic Park, a legitimately great actor, uh, campy and event horizon, amazing and hunt for the wilder people. Really funny in his little role here with Matt Damon, uh, was fun to see that. Um, but there was a line that made me laugh real hard in this movie. And it's when he's back towards back in Asgard and he's with Valkyrie and they're all trying to like meet to, to figure out a plan.

[00:38:34] And you go over and there's some creature that's drawn on a marker board. And he's like, what's, what are they doing? And Valkyrie's like, she's taking minutes, like the minutes of the meeting. And Thor goes, precious minutes. We don't have. Heads earth is really funny. Perfect delivery and a great line. That's like something out of arrested development. That's like Joe Bluth walking into a Bluth construction meeting and be like, what's she doing? What's Kitty doing over there?

[00:39:03] And she's taking minutes. He's like precious. Like that's like something that you would find and like a perfect line to like, I don't know if it belongs to this movie, but it made me like I did a spit take. I was drinking something and it got like, it really got me. Like that's my kind of humor. So I did like that a lot. Uh, all right, let's take a break. We'll come back. We'll get to the way one and the what a Marvel here on deck. The hallmark. Marvel boys.

[00:39:34] Bye. We're back. I hope that you're well. Um, and that your family's well, uh, let's get to the way. What is when we're talking about what in this room is going what I'll start with you. Right guy. You know, obviously when they wrapped up end game, I would imagine that the working thought was that they would do a Thor guardians crossover movie. That obviously is not ends up ends up being what happens. And so you get what's a really cool eight to 10 minutes of the guardians of the galaxy.

[00:39:58] But again, in a movie that, you know, precious minutes, we don't have like those 10 minutes spread out to everything else we're talking about. And again, the guardian stuff was fun, but you don't that that adds virtually nothing to the film. You could illustrate Thor wanting a home and a family, uh, else, you know, in different ways. And so very enjoyable content, but odd. I, I don't have many weight. What's in this movie because I would have had to take it seriously.

[00:40:25] I, I, I, most of mine are guardians of the galaxy related and I just forgot they were in this movie. And Chris Pratt looks like he'd rather be anywhere else. I like the battle is great, but he looked like he wasn't in it at all. Why? I have to imagine for as little as he's in it. Like he had to like, yeah, probably in between things. Like, yeah. Like he had a busy, I'm not a cameo. He had a cameo appearance. No, Chris Pratt is what Chris Pratt is.

[00:40:54] We're not here to, we've commented plenty. He, he looks like in this movie, he would rather be anywhere. He is not even, I don't even know if he makes eye contact with anyone. I gotta get back to. It's ironic too, because the whole gimmick in character is the, you know, the bleep measuring contest between Thor and Star Lord. And like here they're like, Chris Pratt, you gotta be in Hemsworth's movie, like, you know, for seven minutes. Like, so he probably is great about it.

[00:41:20] I just, he just, and like, it, it was so crazy to me. It was a great scene in the movie. I love that whole sequence. And I gotta be honest of the, of the editing here to go from the Christian Bale thing to a battle with the guardians of the galaxy does kind of ease us into the absurd humor of the rest of the movie. But I was just, I kept going, man, Chris Pratt is not even being Star Lord right now. He's just here. He's delivering his lines and he's moving on. It was wild.

[00:41:49] Wants to get on that spaceship. I'll go through my, the rest of mine quickly. This bothered me on first viewing, second viewing, this viewing. I agree that the sequence to start the movie of Christian Bale is great. At one point when he finds the, his God, he eats a big thing of fruit. And then there's a lot of closeups on his face and the fruit is never consistent around his mouth. It's almost to the point where I think it had to be done intentionally. Cause it's so radically different every time, but I don't know what the like auteur artistic reason for that would be.

[00:42:19] Um, so I'm going to assume it's just really bad continuity, but maybe it was a really out there vision. There's no way you could get it right. Yeah. No way. I'm just, I'm just the big idiot on another level, brother. Yeah. Yeah. Uh, well, I mean, I could get it with a baby to caboose if you keep raising me up. Um, I don't know how or why Jane's hair grows and changes colors when she turns into Thor, but I think it's really cool. Like, you know, it's like, I know that she can look like Thor.

[00:42:46] She also becomes kind of a bumbling idiot when she becomes Thor, which is crazy. That was like a weird, like, she's like a, what a neuroscientist, a physics. She's like one of the smartest people alive. Yeah. And then she becomes like super jacked. And all of a sudden, like, I guess all that brain power went to like creatine for her muscles. I don't know. Like, I like, it's crazy how, how it's that. That's what they do here. I don't, I didn't get it. Maybe if I held a Mjolnir, like my shirt would grow a little longer, which should be convenient.

[00:43:14] Um, because, uh, and then last one, Korg just as a face is legitimately disturbing. Funny, but legitimately disturbing. And that's it for me. Um, infinity cones seems too soon. An ice cream shop called infinity cones with the gauntlet sticking out of it. Seems too soon. I don't even know if there's trillions of people died. Yeah. Um, but infinity cones. They're back.

[00:43:42] It was a really tough five years for a lot of people. Those five years that lost those five years with their families, they were on infinity cones. We're probably still rebuilding the world even now, but they're back. Like, you know, right. Probably a lot of people are homeless, but like, you know, and then I did as great as Christian Bale is in this movie, doing the thing that he's doing, which is, uh, I don't, what do you think? What, what do you think he was told about the movie?

[00:44:08] But anyway, um, at the end, he just goes, I'm dying. It was like a kid who's trying to stay home from school. I'm sick. It was very, it was clearly fake coughs. And then he just goes, I'm dying. Yeah. He had seen the dailies at that point. He was like, I do. I got to pull a Chris Pratt here and just get out. That's right. I just want to know. I would love an off the record conversation with Christian Bale about his first watch of the full, or maybe he's not seen it.

[00:44:36] Maybe he's one of those guys who's like, I did my thing and I left and I got my check, but I was in like, you got all a Christian Bale. Like, but he clearly, he gives opinions about this. Sure. I mean, like he's like, I'll do another Batman only if Chris Nolan called, like, I won't do it. Like I've never put on the suit unless Chris Nolan wants to make it. But like, he doesn't ever, if he didn't like a movie he was in, he won't say that, but he will also not rave about the movie. He'll just kind of be like, Oh, thank you so much. He's one of these guys.

[00:45:05] But if you got him off the record, maybe by that scene, he would have been like, yeah, I'd, I'd seen some stuff. Yeah. Yeah. That's his attempt at adding comedy to the movie. Cause he didn't try the rest of the time. I'm dying. I'm dying. Christian Bale's fake dying to pawn love off on Thor. I'm dying. It's bad. Uh, Dano. Uh, yeah, I don't have a ton once again. Cause I, I think the movie just kind of is a big weight.

[00:45:34] What, uh, Thor, uh, Jane comes back and I do think it's played for laughs, but Thor says it's been eight years, seven months, six days. First of all, that psychopath material full stop. Second of all, none of this is mentioned before. Now we've had other Thor movies. We've had Avengers movies. He's never pined for Jane at that level. And all of a sudden he has. And it's like, like I get that we've changed the character of Thor. This is crazy.

[00:46:02] Like this is a, like, this is not, this guy probably forgot for, has forgotten every password he's ever created. The current version of Thor is a forgetful dude. Who's kind of a bumbling idiot. He does not have, he does not have the number of years, days and months down for, for how long it's been since he's seen Jane. There's just no way. Eight years. What's the limit on that? What's the limit on that being normal?

[00:46:29] 45 days, 60, like how many? I think less, I think like less than a year. Like a year. Like one year. Eight months. Even six months feels like, yeah. But as soon as you start going six months, eight days, that's creepy. Yeah, but you can do, like, I don't know. You can do that math pretty quickly. I just think it's like, I think it's definitely under a year. I would give it less than that, but it's definitely not something that this Thor is doing.

[00:46:53] He also had to keep track while being out of shape blob Thor, which I feel like, I mean, he was focused on like Fortnite at that time. And he's not mentioned, like for a guy that's not mentioned Jane in movies years, it's just weird that he's remembered all of that information. And then last, somehow it got to me and all the way through the hot take and the feels and the way it was. And we just not talked about Russell Crowe as Zeus. I mentioned it briefly. I said it didn't work. Yeah, it is.

[00:47:23] Didn't work is this very kind, Ryan. This is, this is the, the bottom. This is the barrel, the bottom of the barrel of this movie. It is not the bottom or the barrel. It's the bottom of the barrel. That's how you say that. I'll get there. We'll get there. It's the bottom of the barrel. It is. I think he's supposed to be doing a Greek accent and is doing it like more of an Italian kind of thing. Russell Crowe was like the original Christian Bale.

[00:47:50] Like he was this very method guy who would gain weight, lose weight. Like, um, I don't know, like you've got to go to the gods to tell them they need protection and to take Zeus's lightning bolt. That is, that's a, that's tough to do. But when you want to make it like a full comedy and then have Russell Crowe, like an Academy

[00:48:15] Award winner, Russell Crowe give this performance was the movie was standing still at that point. That actually was the scene where I was like, there's nothing this bad in dark world. There's nothing this bad in dark. Like this is like, I don't know. I just, that whole, I couldn't like you got two Academy Award winners in Christian and did Portman's one, one too. Hasn't she? Yes.

[00:48:41] You have three nominated for another best actor Academy Award winners in this movie. Guys, Matt Damon's in the movie. You got four. He didn't win best actor, but still you got four. He won a screenwriter. Thor's got four. I just, what are we doing? Thor and Gore have four. Thor and Gore have four. Thor and Thor have four. You got it. Sheesh. That's all I got. It's time for what a marvel. Right guy. What are you marveling at? Yeah.

[00:49:10] To the point of Zeus, I feel very confident that in the power rankings of post-credit scenes that will never be followed up on. I don't, I doubt we'll ever see the guy from Ted Lasso as Hercules. Red Goldstein as Hercules, ladies and gentlemen. I doubt, I doubt. I would be surprised if we ever see that again. I will say I'll also be surprised and I don't think it's really meant to be a tease, but the Natalie Portman Idris Elba Valhalla Disney Plus show would slap.

[00:49:37] I don't think that's ever going to come to fruition, but that show would slap, slap hard, Bran. Yeah. Mine was definitely, I don't mean to jump you here, but mine was the, the, the, the end credit scene. You okay? Yeah. You see your hands up. I'll give you whatever you want. I, uh, the Brett Goldstein is Hercules. Like that's another case of like, this guy just was like, after he was Roy Kent, I mean, yeah. And it was like, well, we're getting in here just in case.

[00:50:04] Like when did, when, at what point did Marvel stingers become, if this goes well, let's have a crazy plan in place. Harry Styles, Brett Goldstein, like it just becomes a, Hey, this is a little taste of if you go see this movie and get like, it becomes a weird fundraiser. It's the complete antithesis of what. It's like go find me. Yeah. Let's just hope somebody calls. Um, it's the complete ant, it's the complete antithesis of what they used to be, which is

[00:50:29] that, you know, we talk about how Thanos wasn't in a ton of actual material before infinity war, but those end credit scenes were like the glue that led us not even to the necessarily the next thing, but the broader vision. There was no broader plan. Guys. Remember that the, the post credit scene in Ant-Man is a scene from the middle of Captain America civil war. Yeah. From the film. Yeah. And I know that you had problems with that, but I'd rather that. No, I'm with you.

[00:51:00] Yeah. Like these, like we're literally most likely never going to see Harry Styles or this guy ever again. So these are like some of the bigger WTF moments in Marvel. Like they're just these random stingers that have nothing to do with anything. My problem, there was timeline, the stinger itself. Like when it aired, I was like, this is a big deal. My problem was in civil war when the timeline feels a little wonky, but it still shows they had a plan to your point. Whereas this is just what is happening right now. Yeah. I mean, mine was going to be a love and thunder, but apparently we're it's a big part of

[00:51:29] doomsday. So I guess we'll find out. I mean, Google says that his daughter will also be in doomsday. I believe she'll be older. Yeah. I believe this is not like officially, but like people are reading through the lines on the teasers that that, you know, at the end of fantastic for doom, like try the baby. Yes. Yeah. I don't know if he's also stealing children at per this plot line. And it's what ran to your point. It's what the baddies do what they do. Yeah.

[00:51:58] But I think that it's something to steal the babies. Yeah. Yeah. I think it's something in that vein. And so granted that's just internet conjecture and rumor, but that's maybe a working theory as to what doomsday will be about or at least part of how mad are the Marvel boys? Not these Marvel boys. How mad are the Marvel bros going to be when Dr. Doom is not facing off directly with Reed Richards and Reed Richards is a side character in this movie. They're going to be so mad, right? Yes. Yeah. I would imagine. So I mean, like we'll get there when we get there. I don't think I haven't thought about that fantastic for movie at all. No.

[00:52:27] Seeing it in theaters. I don't even know if it's bad. Just as my memory of that movie is I was my first 40 X in Greenville. And so the 40 X was fun. That's probably the way to see it. Yeah. I really liked the flick. I mean, it was, I didn't dislike it. I mean, we'll get again, but like I haven't thought of it one time since. I need to watch it again. No, that's two summers ago now. Two summers ago already. No way. That had to be last summer. Was it last? Man. I mean, I think I kind of. Last year. Last year. Okay. Wow. Yeah.

[00:52:56] I have not, it has not, it did not make an impression. You know, time moves slowly. That's what I always hear is it moves very slowly. That was just literally a year and 19 days. So. Yeah. It's tough because Superman came out that same year. Yeah. And it's like one of those movies. And Superman came out two weeks before it. It's like an all timer superhero movie. And then Fantastic Four is a fine movie, but no one's going to remember that. Yeah. All right. Let's, let's be done. Shall we? I love that plan. We're going to be back next week with what is it next week? Is it?

[00:53:26] Oh, it's, it's Black Panther. Is it Black Panther? It's Black Panther and then Quantumania. So we'll. I will say last thing. I know we have to be done. Pretty rough. Now, granted, I don't want to make a joke because this was out of their hands, but this is two back to back movies with like very real life stakes, you know, Jane's battling cancer and then a character next week, which again was. But yeah, to Bran's point, the character next week is going to die in the world of Wakanda. And I think there's going to be. They never.

[00:53:55] I don't think they ever say what the illness is. They don't. Which is a good choice for real life reasons, by the way. I was thinking about showing this to my kids. It's two hours and 41 minutes long. So Black Panther 2 is two hours and 41 minutes long. Sure is guys. I want to say this is going. And you know what? Give me an extra hour of it. This is going from memory, but I feel like Wakanda forever. They. It's something to do with his heart because she runs in and she's trying to come up with a. You might be right. Like a way to save them. So I will say it's might be like battle related, but I don't know. I might be wrong.

[00:54:25] I will say this is the movie I am most intrigued to watch. I saw it in theaters, liked it, but kind of like Fantastic Four just hadn't thought a lot about it since Dan's reviews on it have been rave. And so literally only my second viewing. Very, very excited to see where I land on. I've seen it twice. I'm about to buy that 4k disc to watch it at home though. Do it right. All right. Come on back for that. Okay. Okay, everybody. Let's do it. I'm back until next time. I'm the first to wish you a. Merry Christmas. Deck the Hallmark is a Bramble Jam podcast produced by Brandon Gray. And yeah, that Greenville, South Carolina.

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[00:55:24] Thanks for listening or don't listen. It's really up to you at this point. It's at the end of the show. I mean, you're listening to me. Hi. But here they come. I promise they're coming. Yep. Here they are. Happy day. Happy day. Happy day. Happy day.